A few nights ago on Twitter, I received this private direct message from one of our followers and it was genuinely heart-warming. It read: “Hey Russian Machine, you’re hysterical. I love your posts. You alone are a good reason to follow Twitter during the game.”
I really appreciated that. And frankly, I’ve also greatly appreciated the 123 followers we’ve accrued so far, and the popular people who have played along with our extremely fake tweets. So here’s to you, our fans, for making this first week so noteworthy.
Below after the jump are some highlights from the week I felt were worth sharing. Please follow all our friends and follow us on Twitter if you haven’t already!
Russian Machine Tweet Highlights
- Russian Machine back from suspension. Maybe score 5 goals tonight, prove point to Mike Green that he isn’t worthy to have as many pts as me.
- Had 4 helpings of pre-game nachos. Feel good. Ready to score hat-trick for Varly’s groin.
- If pothier lunge like that one more time, he be on Injured Reserved with Varly.
- I worry for Brooksie — he stranded with 2 Bears on his line. And not the kind that I wear on expensive Dolche and Gabbana winter coat.
- Russian Machine loves girls! You may be my Friday. Hooter Girl Saturday. RT @Hello_Courtney @russianmachine I think I love you!
- Watch me score more goals while I slide on ice. RT @ngreenberg @russianmachine down 3 goals – what would gretzky do?
- I eat more Nachos. Ovie feel good! Me and Backy and Sasha will focus on game instead of make pretty passes, smile at camera.
- What is this? They do not show this in Russia. RT @DanaWalker_chat OH NOOO…MY DVR IS TRYING TO RECORD GLEE & MODERN FAMILY.
- Until I knock him over… RT @heatherjolee Andrew Brunette is such a stand-up guy. #nhl #mnwild
- #nhlpasswords Mike Green: IamaBoringChrisCooley
- #nhlpasswords bruce boudreau: whataboutthecupholders?
- Russian Machine doesn’t understand why #Flyers play so bad. Maybe God get them back for fans who boo me.
- @Pensblog I tell you what I tell #Flyers fans, you should follow me so you know what true goal scorer look like.
- I’d go with you but I sit with Backy and Sasha on Bench RT @ahwahoo2006 Anyone want to go to the #Caps game tomorrow? I have an extra ticket
- @Greenie5252 Toughest Defenseman to get past? Probably Schultzie when he farts during practice after 1 of his barbecues.
- Hey #NHL fans, make sure you tell @Pensblog how much you hate them and their team, unless you fan of Crosby’s flesh colored beard.
- You just respond, maybe this is Pittsburgh Education failing you. RT @Pensblog sorry we don’t respond to blogs with under 50 followers, fag
- oops I hurt Gleason again. Sorry I shoot puck at your face. Get well soon!
- I think Sasha is upset he has to skate with Brooksie. He keeps yelling expletives at him in russian. Bruce reunite us soon
- Pssttt I’ll tell you locker room secret… Backy is icing his ass right now after blocking first shot of career in Overtime.
- @felixpotvin Did I ever score goals on you? If not let’s get hose and make rink outside in parking lot before I fly home.
- Joe B. is wrong! Wayne Primeau no whisper sweet nothings in my ear. He slash my legs and say “you %^#ing #$%^ I kill u”
- Varly and his Ben Gay travel with us on Road trip but I don’t think he play. RT @kueble #caps fans do we know anything about Varly returning
- @JapersRink In honor of your new found love for Sarge, I want to buy you 55 beers.
- @Souchkin Thanks for being 88th Follower! Now I don’t have to think of terrible team and Crosby and #marchofthepenguins.
- Sasha is gonna be pissed when they overturn this! RT @ngreenberg Laich make goal like Pele
- Denver doesn’t sound happy with that period. We at hockey game @avs fans, not funeral!! Didn’t you see my sick assists?
- Bruce remind me in lockerroom that we up mile high. So I be responsible about how long I stay out on shift: keep it under 5 minutes.
- Not true. He fetch Russian Machine’s nachos. RT @cmasisak22 Kyle Wilson is back … looks like it was a skate issue
- Do my eyes fail me? Was that Sarge actually shoving someone?
- Tom Poti learn that move from curling team that practice at Kettler after us.
- Bad news. Greener wake up and eye swollen shut, but no concussion! This is good! But then he walk into door and now he have one.
- Last night Sasha go to palm reader after we get dinner. Crazy lady say she can’t tell future with him. Say he too mysterious.
- Russian Machine can’t say same! RT @davesteckel39 There’s no truth to the rumor that @jeffschultz55 had an affair with Scott Hartnell’s wife
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