My girlfriend teaches a lesson to her fifth graders: RUSSIAN MACHINE NEVER BREAKS.

My girlfriend teaches a lesson to her fifth graders: RUSSIAN MACHINE NEVER BREAKS.

Sometimes there are pinnacle moments in your life when you look at your significant other and go: Yes, you are the one for me. And today was one of those days. Since I was too busy slaving away on designing Vacation Rental Websites on the other side of Columbia, I’ll let Ashley tell her story. I hope you enjoy.

As a teacher in a conservative school, it’s not often that I get a lot of choice on my wardrobe. Today, however, was the finale of our spirit week, “Jersey Day.” Though I have managed to collect a few random t-shirts from the Capitals, Ravens and the Orioles, I have never made the jump to a costly Capitals jersey. So I donned my secret weapon, my incredible smile, and allured my boyfriend Ian into lending me his sacred signed Ovie jersey.

The conditions for the loan were thus; that I not eat, drink, or go outside in it, that I lock it up when doing one of those things, and that I take pictures for RMNB.

My school had a variety of sports teams, from Maryland to the Colts. I did pose for a photo strangling one poor girl with a Roth-berger jersey, but it was too violent to publish.

I proudly strutted with my oversized Caps jersey, realizing that it’s hard to discipline and manage kids when my sleeves are too long even to show my hands. I have a good enough Capitals base at my school to hear a few whispers of, “Is that really Ovie’s signature?” behind me as I ran copies and searched for troublemakers.

Coincidentally, I had promised a few of my students that we’d play hockey today after school, and that was a blast. I got the only adult-sized hockey stick and played on the blue team, a.k.a. my homeroom. We found a few fourth graders and played 3-on-6. When more 5th graders showed up, I took the happy neutral position of blowing my whistle when the fourth graders did something annoying or odd. I pretended that they were the Penguins, and sure enough, we -I mean, my students- won the match.

  • WashCapsRock

    Ashley – this was great! I think someone *cough your boyfriend* needs to buy you a proper jersey. They are on sale at the pro shop at VC tomorrow (5/15).

  • Cool! I wish I had a cool teacher. xD Hahaha. Ashley is awesome! Haha. I agree with WasCapsRock. Hehe. It’s cool that you played with them too. How nice. 🙂

    btw, I read The Giver last year. I cried. But my English teacher was not very good with reading schedules, so we took a long time readin that short book.

  • Awesome! But really, how can Ian not have bought you a jersey of your own already? Ian, get on that!

  • BobbyG

    This is a great story. I’d like a follow-up on the students’ essays about Ovie’s greatness. Sure, we here at RMNB know but I for one would like to know what the kids think.

  • TEF

    Ashley, that was a great story! Did people offer to pay you to touch that famous autographed jersey? You could sell tickets! Go Caps! (well, maybe next year)

  • One of the classes I teach (high school level) is anatomy and physiology. I also teach forensic science. Needless to say, I tend to wear my #28 jersey on the days when I talk about semen. 😉