What is Pierre McGuire Doing? (GIF)

The play happens at the 38-second mark.

During Friday’s series-sweeping Boston win over the Pittsburgh Penguins, Brad Marchand did his thing. But I’m not here to chronicle another Louganisian dive or a infuriating cheap shot, instead I want to take a look at what happened when he tried to steal Sidney Crosby‘s stick during a line-change.

As Crosby dumps the puck into the Bruins zone, Marchand, loading up to make a big hit, instead softly shoves the Penguins captain in the left shoulder. Crosby skates away, but Marchand isn’t finished chatting. He grabs Crosby’s stick and refuses to let go.

Marchand is a toddler, sure, but the interesting part is Pierre McGuire and his reaction. Pierre, with a look of concern, raises his right hand twice and then, after flinching backwards from the players, lunges forward, and smiles. It’s creepy.

pierre-wut

GIFs by welshhockeyfan

I’ve been thinking about this for almost 24 hours and I still have no idea what he is doing. I’ve got four possibilities:

A) Adrenaline has taken control, and Pierre tries to protect himself from getting hit in the dome with 87’s stick.
B) Pierre is waving to Czech homeboy Jaromir Jagr.
C) Pierre is trying to play referee, reach for Crosby’s stick, and break the play up. Then he thinks better of it.
D) Pierre is just so emotional over Crosby getting picked on, he has a temporary breakdown.

Best take another look. Enhance quadrant J-5!

pierre1

pierre2

Please note that the other guy between the glass doesn’t flinch. At all.

Let’s wrap it up with an excerpt from an AP story about the NHL and its great ratings in the playoffs.

The innovation Sam Flood (executive producer for NBC Sports) considers his best is the in-game segment called “Inside the Glass,” which features analyst Pierre McGuire in a section between the benches, updating viewers in real time with information he’s picked up from that unique vantage point.

“It changed the way the game was perceived at home, offering things we’d never get from an announcer two decks above the ice,” Flood said. “Coaches barking orders at players, players challenging each other — that kind of access is critical.

“It’s one more piece of the puzzle, like what NASCAR was doing with reporters in the pit, giving fans access to a place they weren’t previously allowed. The feedback’s been great,” Flood chuckled. “People tell us it’s like being part of a secret club.”

Having a reporter between the benches to give more insight into the game is great. Alan May kills it during the one game per season he is down there. But I have not met one person who enjoys Pierre McGuire’s coverage. I would love to hear this “great feedback” Flood speaks of. All I see is a bootlicking weirdo who injects himself into the story at every turn. Can someone hire him as a coach or GM already?

  • http://twitter.com/kat326 Rachel Cohen

  • Shea

    That other guy is Glenn Healy from CBC!

  • http://www.facebook.com/aemoreira81 aemoreira81

    Hey Bergy (Patrice Bergeron), I hear you have a “long stick”.

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland
  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/ Peter Hassett

    CBC? Sounds foreign. I DON’T TRUST IT.

  • benonijump/Jonathan Kenny

    I’m gonna give McGuire a break and say that I don’t mind him at all “between the glass.” My problem with him–he is certainly not the only analyst on NBC Sports Network that I have this issue with–is his commentary at intermissions or after games “in the booth.” Of course, i am thinking about his/their comments as relates to the Caps, e.g. the SE division is weak w/o any acknowledgement that the NW is arguably worse; criticism of Alex Semin that I didn’t always feel was justified and certainly didn’t appreciate all aspects of his game (I will say, though, that I think the Canes were crazy to give him $7M/year. THAT much is TOO much); and, mostly, criticism of the Caps and in particular their top players (Ovi, Backie, Green) for their playoff losses. It’s not so much their criticism of the Caps, but that they seem to be lacking an equally critical eye when it comes to other “underperforming” playoff teams, namely the Penguins. Recall that the Pens also lost to Halak and the Habs as well as Roloson and the Bolts. Last year the Pens were embarrassed and discombobulated by the Flyers. The video above makes has no mention or criticism of the Pens after one of the most star-studded line-ups we have seen just got swept by a team that was having trouble with the Maple Leafs 3 weeks ago. Crosby, Malkin, and Letang combined for ZERO points yet I don’t hear any of the criticism that I imagine i would if Ovi, Backie, and Green had suffered the same fate. As for McGuire in particular, I don’t think many Caps fans minded his between the glass comments during this game:

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ktKrvz0qpsY

  • cobra617

    It actually looks like he is blessing Crosby’s stick.

  • ChuchutrainLA

    “The undisputed greatest player in hockey endured the most miserable playoff series of his career.

    Crosby actually played his finest game of the series in Game 4 and was probably the game’s best player, other than the unflappable Rask.”

    —> God bless the biased-ass Pitt media. This would make the head editor of Soviet “Pravda” smile. Even the acknowledgement of failure, is somehow a compliment and evidence supporting Crosby’s undisputed greatness.

    http://triblive.com/sports/penguins/4151722-74/penguins-bruins-series?utm_source=feedburner&utm_medium=feed&utm_campaign=Feed%3A+tribunereviewpenguins+%28Penguins+Stories%29#ixzz2Vhm8PTEn

  • Rhino40

    OMFG ROTGDFLMMFAO!!!!! hahahahahahahahahaha)))))))) Best!

  • Andy

    I just like the american football link.

  • http://twitter.com/kat326 Rachel Cohen

    The longer I watch this, the funnier it gets.

  • leaveittobeagle

    i needed this. thank you.

  • bskillet

    Pierre wants so much to be a part of the game. He really is creepy, ask about any player pro, college, minors etc….he knows strangely way too much. Aside from that and having to watch those games he’s in the glass on mute he’s really…..well.

  • Rhino40

    Well said. Of course, there are those who will respond with the resumed beating of that old fossilized Eohippus: “But the Pens have 3 Cups and the Caps have none!” So what?.

    IMO, the best things to happen to televised hockey are:

    HDTV–no, I/m not talking about the Galactic Master ‘Honey-Do’ List Generator, but about High Definition Television technology. This–coupled with ever-larger and ever-sharper TV screens–was mainly responsible for TV viewers being able to follow the action without stupid, lame gimmicks like Fox’s glowing puck.

    Innovative camera placement Generally, I’m talking about more cameras covering the action from more angles. But more specifically, I am referring to the special camera setup used by NBC Sports Network back when they used to be Versus.

    A few years ago, Versus was covering the NHL All-Star Game. In addition to the usual plethora of overhead and ice-level cams, they also mounted aluminum rails along the top of the glass on each side, running the length of the rink. On each of these rails was a motorized motion-control camera setup (much like that used for Star Wars™ space battles before CGI became the filmmaker’s “weapon of choice”). Kind of like the mechanical bunny at the dog track.

    The Versus control room would cut to one of these cameras and send it zipping up and down the rail on every breakaway.

    The result for the home audience was Full of Epic Awesomeness: It didn’t just look like you were at the arena watching the game in person–it was as if you were on the ice with the players!!!

    “Hey Bäckis!!! I’m open!!!!”

    I think NBC SportsNet would do well to bring back the “mechanical bunnycam” (as I like to call it) and dump McGuire…These things would go a loooong way toward making their broadcasts less Penguin-centric.

  • Rhino40

    Hey Ian…What is the correct pronunciation of “Louganisian“?

    a) “Loo-gun-EE-zhən”?

    b) “Loo-gay-NIS-ee-yən”?

    c) “Lou-GAY-niss-ee-yən

    d) “sdfgjmqrjgrkj”? (This is thought by many to be the Czech translation, because it lacks any vowels whatsoever).

    …and while I’m at it, what about “Louganic”, “Louganoid”, “Louganese” or “Louganite”?.

    I kid, of course. As always, you rock.

    Peace,

    Das Rhino

    P.S., I propose that, henceforth, whenever the Caps host Boston or Pittsburgh and an opposing player dives to draw a penalty, the Multimedia Gods at Verizon Center shall play an audio clip from the Beatles’ song “Yellow Submarine”. Heh.

  • kemiisto

    Is not he just trying to use The Force?

  • Rhino40

    LOL