brouwer-gets-squirted

Playing the Winnipeg Jets on Tuesday, Troy Brouwer scored a powerplay goal — his third of the year — off a pretty, pretty pass from Nicklas Backstrom. Brouwer got mobbed by his teammates, skated back towards the bench, and… hey wait a second.

Go to the 27-second mark.

Is that what I think it is…

Let’s slow it down a bit.

brouwer-gets-squirted5

One of those SOBs on Winnipeg squirted Troy Brouwer with Gatorade after he scored! What a jerk!

But who did it? I need to know.

After watching the video and GIF a few times, I couldn’t find any clues, so I had to go frame by frame.

As Brouwer skates by, one of the Jets players wearing an A can be seen holding the offending Gatorade bottle.

who-sprayed-brouwer

The A of course means that this player is an alternate captain. So I checked the roster report. The Jets had two alternate captains dressed that night.

jets-alternate-captains

Olli Jokinen and Dustin Byfuglien.

Now logic dictates that a defensemen is way more likely to sit at the end of the bench, closer to their team’s defensive zone than an offensive player.

But dammit, that’s not enough evidence.

If only there was another clue…

olli-jokinen-took-penalty

Oh, that’s right. Jokinen was in the box during that Caps powerplay.

Therefore, we have enough evidence to finger one man on the Jets.

dustin-byfuglien-jerk

Photo credit: Vincent Pugliese

Big Buff, you sir, are a meanie.

Thanks to @firefghteremt08 who first pointed the squirting incident out to us.

  • Brouwer Rangers

    You should get some sort of medal for this.

  • Brackaphobia

    Incidents like that should happen more, so posts like this can happen more.

    A fine job, sir.

  • dylan wheatley

    They won a Stanley cup together so I’m gonna guess they’re pals

  • Chris Cerullo

    This is the investigative journalism you were talking about on twitter last night. I see now. Haha. Probably buddies from Chicago.

  • vt caps fan

    weren’t these guys teammates in chicago? probably Dustin’s way of getting back at an old buddy.

  • zoltoner

    Back, and to the left. Back, and to the left.

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    Or maybe like Kobayashi, Big Buff is just dousing him with liquid before eating him whole.

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HgqbCq_sxmo

  • http://hollowboy.com/ hollowtim

    “…we have enough evidence to finger one man” ~Tobias Fünke

  • RedRockingElla

    job well done!

  • Oviespillow

    Sorry I think your wrong. In the picture you can see the droplets ahead of him but buf is behind Brouwer. You’ve been reassigned to the case.

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    Two things:

    1) “Sorry I think your wrong” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=13FV1GaA20I

    2) It was a good, precise shot from Buff. Buff shot in front of him. Look at the video. He lead his squirt into Brouwer, like a quarterback throwing to a wide receiver. It makes me think Buff’s a veteran squirter, he’s done this before. Okay, this is getting weird.

  • Mikey

    Are there Emmys for blogs? Seriously, you all should get one. I’m not sure what the category would be but it would be something like ‘kick ass’.

  • Brouwer Rangers

    A veteran move, indeed. Wait until the victim is right about in line with or just past you and lead the squirt ahead of him so he doesn’t notice you’ve done it until it’s too late.

  • Ash

    This is awesome but okay, I’ve now had to think of Buff in terms of both being “fingered” and “a veteran squirter” and I DON’T THINK I LIKE LETTING MY MIND GO THERE.

  • Janiac

    Funny, I saw that and Troy look back during the game and wondered if I was seeing things. Thanks for checking this out :)

  • Bryan Egan

    Looks like Ian has a raging clue.

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lcHy8xEt2QI

  • Tall28guy

    I’m not saying it was not him however now that I watch this a few times the angle of the liquid does not match his location (even if he lead him some). lt looks like it was shot from farther up the bench……… your photo also shows Byfuglien’s bottle pointed up. I agree with what you are saying with the exception of the forensics of the liquid (coming at him and downward). It was shot arched upward and going from the left to the right. #AlmostGotTheMoneyShot

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/ Peter Hassett

    okay, that’s our south park quota for the day

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    I have the number of an optometrist you might want to call.

  • Manda

    Someone needs to ask Brouwer to comment on “Gatorate” (sorry)!

  • manda

    P.S. I don’t think Big Buf has been quite the same since he posed with The Cup wearing his Thrashers jersey. Ouch.

  • KarmicAbyss

    It’s also a fairly dark hand on the bottle, hence Byfuglien

  • Rhino40

    quod erat demonstrandum
    I can see the headlines now:
    Best Blog Busts Big Buff’ for Bestowing Bilious Beverage Bath on Brouwer

  • Tall28guy

    LOL it’s all good. I did not study too much.

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    hahaha

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    Haha. We’re cool, but really, I spent like 3 hours on this. I’m 200% sure!

  • Cord

    They were teammates on the Blackhawks, it was probably good natured.

  • yv

    The only person who immediately coming into mind is notorious JOKInnen. I’d be not surprised if he, mad on refs and Caps, quickly skated from the box to the bench and greeted Brouwer with water there.

  • schwoogiejoe

    AHHHHH MIMI BEARDSLEY

  • Drew

    You guys definitely do your research!

  • Jim

    Three hours?