RMNB on CRL: Reliving Olie Kolzig’s Caps Commercial

olie-impressed-with-himself

When I started submitting rough ideas for our segments on CRL this summer, there was one subject I was determined to address: those great Washington Capitals commercials from the late 90’s. The story goes like this: in 1999, a little after Ted Leonsis first bought the team from Abe Polin, he commissioned Doug Liman, the dude who made that awesome Tiger Woods trick shot commercial for Nike and the director of The Bourne Identity, to do commercials for the Caps.

They were amaaaazing. Andrei Nikolishin and Steve Konowalchuk face-offed for salad. Chris Simon checked an old lady at a grocery store to defend Peter Bondra’s honor. And then there was Olie Kolzig.

Kolzig, who was one of my childhood heroes growing up, goes out on a romantic dinner with an actress playing his wife. Then Kolzig pours the wine, and that’s when the magic happens.

Video






A few observations.

  • This interview was shot in a kinda/sorta-blocked off area at Rock Bottom at Ballston Commons Mall.
  • I apologize to the people dining in the restaurant that day. After I filmed the wine shot (Olie, thankfully, had left by that point), I ripped off my soaking wet shirt (because it was very, very cold) and ran, toplesss, to the bathroom to wipe myself down with cheap paper towels. That was weird. They chafed.
  • Here are some exclusive bonus photos from Chris Gordon: 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5.
  • You might say, “Ian, why didn’t you bring a towel? You scripted this. You knew what was going to happen.” These are all good points. I have no excuse.
  • I smelled like raspberries for two days.
  • Olie Kolzig really was my hero growing up. Look at us here from my high-school days, total bros.
  • Olie made a lot of jokes about breaking sticks across people’s shins. I think he’s proud of how physically imposing he was as a goaltender.

GIFs

A toast.

The revealing of the figurine.

When in Rome…

Yup, totally nailed it.

Contest! Win This Signed Olie Kolzig Postcard

Like last time, we’re running a contest for this segment. We’ll pick at random one person who retweeted our tweet or publically shared our post from Facebook. That person will win these sweet postcards Olie signed after the shoot below.

kolzig-postcards

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  • Chris Cerullo

    Him and Bonzai need to have their jerseys in the rafters very soon

  • Shawn Murphy

    NAILED IT

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    Yes. Piney Orchard was the best.

  • Justin Siegel

    Wow, awesome post. Olie was one of my favorites growing up too. I definitely had that second figuring you showed. Makes me miss the days when we knew who the Caps starting goalie was night in and night out. Thanks for the memories.

  • Andrew Merewitz

    So easy to get autographs and get close to the players

  • Andrew Merewitz

    This is awesome. I love this commercial and Godzilla… I still have the mask they handed out during the 1998 playoff run

    http://imgur.com/kf0jYYr

  • Shaun Phillips

    I tried so hard to forget that jersey. Why?!?

  • brian!

    Nice! I must have missed the masks, but I have a bunch of the playoff rally towels they handed out.

  • Ken Young

    I have tried unsuccessfully to find the Crazy Ron bit. It has to be out there somewhere!

  • Igor Kleyner

    THAT shirt! I never asked for anything, Ian – but I want the shirt!

  • Patrick Neimeyer

    For years I never knew where Braden Holtby’s “Post-Goal Giving Up,” Celebration came from…well Olie the Goalie you are a ladies man and a king among tenders :)

  • https://twitter.com/Haddaweezy Holy_Cal

    @ianoland:disqus What bottle of wine was wasted? I enjoy me some raspberry wines.

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    Only the finest of Raspberry Cranberry juices.

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    ..

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    Hm. I’ll trade it for a piece of the Chelyabinsk meteor. You are both Russian and work for NASA. Should be easy!

  • https://twitter.com/Haddaweezy Holy_Cal

    Ahhh, so not real wine?

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    That is so cool! Thanks for sharing. Brings back awesome memories.

  • Andrew Merewitz

    Yeah, found it a few years back when cleaning out my old room. Definitely brought me back to the OLIE-OLIE-OLIE chants

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    Nope! It wasn’t. I mean it wasn’t going in our tummies anyways, so it was not worth spending $20 bucks or so for something fancy.

    Me and Olie actually joked about it in the interview, but it was probably too frivolous to include in the final segment. There was just so much good stuff from Olie. Really. Dude is such an amazing story teller.

  • https://twitter.com/Haddaweezy Holy_Cal

    Frivolous?! You mean to tell me Uncle Teddy didn’t foot the bill with that AOL money?

    You probably could’ve gotten away with charging a 1961 Chateau Latour… whether or not wasting that would be a good idea is up for discussion though.

  • Fedor

    Are you sure you’re supposed to reveal stuff like that?

  • http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com Ian Oland

    Am I not supposed to tell people that we didn’t get drunk at 11 am on a Monday?

  • MuzzMuzzington

    Brace yourself. A red variant of it is coming for the Winter Classic (god, I hope not…)

  • Diller M

    I know I’m gonna get a ton of thumbs down for this, but I gotta say it, I was never a fan of Olie. Yes he carried us in 98 and I will never forget that, but in the dead puck era his career numbers aren’t that good. He was a career below average goalie (.906) with one amazing season and playoff run. Just a little overrated for me, and personally I think he’s screwing up our young guys, who are better then he ever was. Ian please don’t delete this:)