Early in the first period, as CSN+ came back from commercial, the end-zone camera zoomed in on Washington Capitals defenseman/dudebro John Carlson chatting with a referee. As Carly skated away for the face-off, he did some open-mouth breathing and we noticed something curious.
It’s hard to make-out, but indeed, Carly is still wearing the patriotic Team USA mouthguard he wore in the Sochi Olympics.
Don’t believe me yet? Take a look at this Alex Trautwig photo from February 28th.
Enhance! Quadrant 42-epsilon!
Yup, that’s totally it.
I’m not sure why Carly is still wearing it. Maybe it’s super comfortable on his teeth. Teeth comfort is important. Maybe he figures the Capitals are the most patriotic team in the NHL, considering their colors and their grand total of one American suiting up every game (Carlson).
If you ask me, I would have burned that thing after Team USA lost 5-0 in the Bronze Medal Game.
That thing is bad luck. It’s got bad vibes, bad juju. And if the Caps miss the playoffs, it’s officially Voldemort in dental mold form.
Russian Machine Never Breaks is not associated with the Washington Capitals; Monumental Sports, the NHL, or its properties. Not even a little bit.
All original content on russianmachineneverbreaks.com is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported (CC BY-NC-SA 3.0)– unless otherwise stated or superseded by another license. You are free to share, copy, and remix this content so long as it is attributed, done for noncommercial purposes, and done so under a license similar to this one.