Photo: Gregg Forwerck
One year ago, an April game between the Carolina Hurricanes and the Washington Capitals would be a huge deal. The main reason the Caps made the 2013 playoffs was Carolina’s swoon. Now, the picture couldn’t be more different. This game didn’t matter to either team– and it showed.
And I get to recap it! Lucky me. I’m sure you guys are just lining up to read this.
Joel Ward scored from Fehr and Chimera early on. Then Chimera scored from Fehr and Ward. Jiri Tlusty notched a shorthanded goal against the suckasoft Caps PP defense, but Troy Brouwer restored the two-goal lead with a one-timer off Marcus’ great cross-slot pass. Eric Fehr scored from Chimera and Ward. Brouwer notched another goal in the third. Radek Dvorak rearranged your keyboard with a late goal for the Canes, but it was already over– on multiple levels.
Caps beat Canes 5-2. This changes everything.
Here’s Joseph Beninati’s suit of the night:
Now, for something completely different.
(9:09:28 PM) Peter Hassett: Hey Ian.
(9:09:34 PM) Ian Oland: hey
(9:09:40 PM) Peter Hassett: What’s your favorite Katy Perry video?
(9:09:45 PM) Ian Oland: Roar
(9:09:51 PM) Ian Oland: are we doing this
(9:09:53 PM) Ian Oland: lol
(9:09:56 PM) Peter Hassett: Roar. Why do you like Roar, Ian?
(9:10:30 PM) Ian Oland: the song is good, but the way she looks in the video is even good-er
(9:11:14 PM) Peter Hassett: See, it’s not my fave version of Katy personally. The whole Tarzan thing? Not my bag.
(9:12:36 PM) Peter Hassett: Okay I’m watching it now and I’m seeing your point.
(9:12:47 PM) Ian Oland: Her clothes are tattered and almost falling off. She makes the #LattaFace
(9:12:57 PM) Ian Oland: There’s good typography
(9:13:00 PM) Peter Hassett: Hahaha. Okay, but quick counterpoint: Teenage Dream.
(9:13:54 PM) Peter Hassett: But in Teenage Dream, she’s basically singing exclusively about premarital sex between really attractive people.
(9:14:05 PM) Peter Hassett: And the video is SHOWING that. They’re not even doing metaphors. It’s just right there.
(9:14:11 PM) Peter Hassett: That’s what high school was supposed to be like.
(9:15:03 PM) Peter Hassett: Instead of playing Dungeons and Dragons and watching South Park in a basement with guys named “Saco” and “The Gimp”
(9:16:25 PM) Ian Oland: Yes, I’ve seen it. It’s almost raunchy
(9:16:29 PM) Ian Oland: I mean every Katy Perry video is a wonderful collection of sexually suggestive pixels. I like my sexual metaphors more coy and cute.
(9:16:48 PM) Peter Hassett: That’s where you and I differ. I want it LITERALLY in my face.
(9:17:02 PM) Peter Hassett: None of this “Dark Horse” junk.
(9:17:35 PM) Ian Oland: I’m re-watching the video again. Her clothes are also tattered in this one. I’m noticing a theme.
(9:17:48 PM) Ian Oland: she’s now humping a car seat
(9:18:01 PM) Ian Oland: she looks more dangerous to drive with than Ovi
(9:18:20 PM) Peter Hassett: No one is more dangerous than Ovi. Except maybe Vince Neil.
(9:18:37 PM) Ian Oland: And there goes her pants
(9:19:19 PM) Ian Oland: If you come out with a song called “I Kissed a Girl (And Liked It)”, when you’re’ actually singing about sexuality with a man, you really gotta bring it.
(9:19:34 PM) Ian Oland: and by bring it, I mean no clothes
(9:19:56 PM) Peter Hassett: See I didn’t like the early Katy stuff. Except for Hot and Cold. This song– not just the video– is so great.
(9:20:06 PM) Peter Hassett: Alright, good talk. I should wrap up the recap. We’ll talk more later.
(9:20:09 PM) Peter Hassett: About Katy
(9:20:11 PM) Ian Oland: sure okay
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