varly-tumbles

As evidenced by some Instagram photos last weekend, former Washington Capitals goaltender Semyon Varlamov is back in the states to start training for next season– just like his Russian compatriots Evgeny Kuznetsov and Dmitry Orlov.

Varly, who finished second in voting for last year’s Vezina Trophy, is working out with expert trainer Steve Saunders for the third straight offseason.

Last week, to improve his explosive strength, Varly attached himself to a bungee cord and did some power jumps away from the wall. It did not go well.

GIFs

Okay, so far so good. Why did I want to write this post again?

Oh, this is why. The exercise equipment almost rips Varly’s pants off.

And the tumble ends with an elegant crash into the wall and floor.

GIFs by varlyvarly

I’m happy to report Varly was not injured on the fall, but I’m pretty sure his pride is still healing.

Video via Semyon Varlamov’s Instagram

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  • Bobandy

    looks like a drunk idiot

  • Clifford Snarlington

    What’s Russian and is pulled back faster than Varly? A missile battery out of Ukraine.

  • Monty B

    Let’s give him a break here. Assaulting and beating your girlfriend takes a lot of energy. He’s tired.

  • Myan

    Heheh this makes me very happy :)

  • bggb

    That woman-beater should bungee his way to jail. So glad I don’t have to root for him.

  • SeminAllOverTheIce

    Apparently someone doesnt read all the stories. Girl made it up to try and get money out of him. I still cheer for Varly. Hands down the best goalie we had. GMGM should have named him number one and traded Neuvy.
    VAR-LY!

  • bggb

    Dismissed due to lack of evidence is not the same thing as it not happening.

  • SeminAllOverTheIce

    That was her case, yeah. But I forget where it was, but it came out that it was like a plot to get money out of him.

  • bggb

    Got any links? I never read or saw that.

    The prosecutor said they believed her story but as is usually the case with abuse, getting a jury to convict is another thing entirely.

  • SeminAllOverTheIce

    I dont off hand no, but it was right around when the prosecution dropped the charges (not dismissed). It was dropped by the prosecution after new information surfaced from the witnesses. Didnt think they could win…hmm.

  • bggb

    I couldn’t find a single reference or article to your claim.

  • Sarah

    We have a reader and regular commenter who’s a lawyer who provided a much better legal interpretation of that case than you can get from reading Puck Daddy or other sources that don’t provide legal expertise. It appears the case was extremely weak. I care a great deal about domestic violence and don’t excuse such things just because someone is talented and famous, but part of caring about victims of violence is respecting due process and presumption of innocence. Take it from someone who’s had to serve as a witness.
    Unfortunately, a lot of that got lost in this case due to the muddled coverage– fame can result in terrible injustices either way.

  • Sarah

    Well, getting slammed against the wall should help prepare him for playing against some teams in the league. I swear to God, it’s like bowling for goalies out there sometimes.

  • SeminAllOverTheIce

    Dont get me wrong, I by no means condone abuse. Not in the least. But calling someone a wife-beater without knowing for sure the truth is wrong. Once labeled, he will always deal with this regardless of guilt/innocence. If he did it, by all means, bash away. I agree celebrity status makes a mess of things.

  • SeminAllOverTheIce

    Here’s to hoping Orpik brings that much needed crease clearing presence we havent had in years. Our goalies get hit all the time and nothing ever happens. Hence they do it again and again.

  • Sarah

    Oh, goodness, I completely agree! I found Graham’s explanation really helpful, and who knows, maybe he can chime in and help again (we need some sort of lawyer version of the Batman sign). As there was a dearth of evidence and the case appears to have been weak, and as we have presumption of innocence in this country, I fully agree, supporting Varly does not mean condoning violence.
    Sadly the coverage was so screwy it looks like we’re probably going to have to have this discussion every time there’s a post on him. Oh well. Slander is a crime, too, and if that’s what happened (which seems the more likely case by now) then we need to clear that up too.
    I by no means thought you were condoning abuse.

  • Sarah

    Hear, hear!

  • SeminAllOverTheIce

    Good to know. Rather than spark this old story up, lets talk about a more recent crime that needs to be addressed. Justin Bieber sporting a Caps hat. NOOOOOOOOOO Someone call Orlando.

  • Sarah

    What the hell??? I thought he was a Leafs fan. I have this on the authority of the Dallas Stars publicity people… the last time Bieber had some run in with the law the leafs were in town and the Stars flashed Bieber’s mug shot (without his name) up on the jumbotron with “Toronto Maple Leafs fan” underneath. Classic trolling.

  • Sarah

    Btw, what I mean by “part of caring about victims is respecting due process…” is that when you have to testify about violence– which my job has put me in the position of doing with depressing frequency– you absolutely cannot come across as biased or the defense will pick you apart, even in the face of credible evidence. I feel like our culture projects a false choice sometimes, that either you care about victims or you care about the law. Not only can you do both, you must do both if you want to be a credible advocate and/or witness. Besides, due process and presumption of innocence exist in our legal system for good reason: some accused folks are innocent.
    Trust me, it’s really hard in the face of blatant abuse to maintain a neutral, objective tone and choose words carefully, but it is an absolute must or guilty people can walk.
    Anyways, hoping we can get back to hockey now…

  • Yo8

    It’s a Russian article where her friend recorded her saying on the phone “that’s the only thing I came for” referring to the only reason why she came to the USA and immediately got herself a lawyer. There was also an interview from a guest show where Varlamov’s dad went and also people who know the girl and her “friend.” She was asked (on a phone since she was still in Colorado) why she got herself a lawyer when getting to Colorado and she storm off.

    I don’t remember if the blog on the Denver post translate it but you can find it on the HFboards on the Colorado Avalanche Semyon Varlamov’s case trend.

    Suit yourself.

  • VeggieTart

    Our goalies may get hit, but damn, Holtby is all too willing to hit right back.

  • VeggieTart

    And that’s the rub. He may be guilty, he may not be. But since there was not enough evidence, the prosecutors had to drop the case. I just hope both he and the girlfriend can get their heads screwed on straight so it doesn’t happen again.

  • Searle

    the exchange between Holtbeast and Peverley is my favourite Holtby moment so far in his career.

  • Graham Dumas

    We SO do not need a lawyer-batman sign!

  • VeggieTart

    Oh, that was excellent. I think it’s my boyfriend’s favorite too. Equally awesome was when he destroyed Travis Moen (and Jack Hillen–oops!)

  • Sarah

    But all you have to do is stick fangs on the bat!
    No, seriously, thank you for your help on that. I guess I wouldn’t want to be on call for every time somebody brings this up either. ;)

  • Jonah

    my favorite HOCKEY moment so far….

  • Graham Dumas

    It’s not that, it’s just I honestly can’t remember what I said! I think at the time I was doing a bunch of sealed-records cases at work, so I focused on the importance of the presumption of innocence absent an actual conviction. Also maybe something about the meaning of the technical disposition of the case?

  • Sarah

    Come to think of it, I think it was in the comments of the entry titled Varlamov “Maniacally Protects the Crease,” under related articles. That just reminded me.
    I love how, possibly due to the wardrobe malfunction in the gif, these are listed next to a men’s underwear ad…

  • BD

    Check this post out for more info and links to Russian press stories on the ex gf.

    http://nhlwagsnhl.tumblr.com/post/77467170406/varlamov-is-on-the-russian-olympics-team-and-people

  • BD

    They broke up at the time of the incident so there will be no future events between them.

  • Ash

    Uh. Yeah, no, to Varly being the best goalie we ever had. What the hell is Olie, chopped liver?

  • SeminAllOverTheIce

    Well first off, I said best goalie we had…as in when he was here. Never said he was the best we EVER had (although the argument could be made). It’s also really hard to judge two different players from different playing times. Having said that, I’m a huge Olie fan. Met him numerous times, excellent guy, great person, really good goalie. But talent wise, Varly probably is better…will be better. The kid is physically gifted/talented. Olie had a great 98, no doubt. Only time will tell though since Varlys career is just beginning. And again, the game changes often, so always hard to compare players from different decades.

  • Ash

    Heh. Okay, I’d be willing to allow Varly might have been the most TALENTED one we had out of the three headed baby goalie monster, but I don’t think you could call him best either– like it or not, injury history plays into it, and if you can’t play, that certainly is a factor. And a player can be the most talented and still not the best player (heeeey, Alex Semin!) I still do that trade every day of the week and twice on Sundays– you can’t let a player dictate to the club to the extent that he wanted to, and he hadn’t legitimately earned the starter role at that time in history. If he was willing to not report because he wasn’t named starter when he still hadn’t earned it, that’s not an attitude that’ll serve the team well.

    If he becomes the next Lundqvist, maybe I’ll regret that, but so far, he’s had his share of good and poor seasons, and I don’t think the good has been consistent or large enough to say he’s best. I’m simply not ready to proclaim him as the best between he and Holtby now, or in the near future, until there’s a couple more seasons. The sample size is just too small.

    And you’re selling Olie a bit short by only mentioning 98, no? Comparison between two bodies of work aside and eras, they overlap each other by several years, a bit more than comparing, two players when one is from the 80’s and one’s from 2000. As you said, only time will tell. But right now, Olie has the better career by dint of longevity and actual accomplishments, and Holtby and Varlamov are still in process of being compared and have too small a body of work to definitively say one is best.

  • OvechkinFiresAndScores08

    Remind me, why isn’t he still playing for the Caps? Oh thats right Mcphee.

  • OvechkinFiresAndScores08

    I thought he like the Blackhawks