UPDATE: The White House Responds To Barack The Red

- Barack Obama’s Secret Love For Hockey is finally exposed by RMNB.

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Really, our mission is simple: Russian Machine Never Breaks wants to show Barack Obama that he would make a terrific hockey fan since he's resisted all efforts to coax him to the Verizon Center and a Caps game thus far.

Apparently, a 14-game winning streak, a two-time MVP, the most electrifying offense in the NHL, and a dancing Astronaut are just not the President's thing. So today we're beginning a grassroots project called "Barack The Red.” We're hosting a Facebook petition and soliciting artwork depicting President Obama as a hockey fan.

Hopefully, the President will surf on over to this site, see the groundswell of support and enthusiastic artwork, and will realize what it would mean to us if he attended a game. We think President Obama, a former community leader and grassroots organizer himself, will appreciate our labor and change his mind about Washington hockey. Oh, the audacity of hope!

“Sir, these are trying times. Unemployment is in double digits, and our military is engaged in multiple wars overseas. The citizenry grows cynical, and the legislature is gridlocked. The budget deficit has never been higher, and the symptoms of climate change continue to imperil the world. But we have found something that gives us hope, something that inspires to try harder and dig deeper. As you've probably guessed, we're talking about the Washington Capitals hockey team.” - Continue Reading...

Imagine a sold-out crowd of 18,277 at Verizon Center with one voice asking President Obama to attend a Caps Game. Friends, imagine no more. With one mouse-click, you have the power to make it happen.

For those who are interested in eternal glory, we will be soliciting creative artwork that shows Barack Obama as a hockey fan. All respectful entries will be placed on our Facebook Page & the Top 5 will be placed below. The Grand Prize Winner, as selected by RMNB, will win a Free T-Shirt.

The President treats hockey like some of us treated the girl with body odor at prom; he doesn't want to hurt her feelings, but he's not going out of his way to dance with her either. We'd gotten our hopes up in July, when in a speech at the New Economic School in Moscow, Russia, President Obama name-checked Alex Ovechkin. But later, when pressed by Chuck Todd on an appearance on Meet The Press, Obama’s true feelings came out:

Chuck Todd: “You mentioned Ovechkin in there, our friend in Washington. Do you think should you have been transparent and said you've never been to a hockey game? Are you going to fix this?”

Barack Obama: “The truth of the matter is that I have watched this guy play, and he's outstanding. But you know, Chuck, I grew up in Hawaii....”

Chuck Todd: “Don't tell those Blackhawk fans that. You became a Bulls fan!”

Barack Obama: “We have basketball [in Hawaii]. We didn't have hockey. I love watching hockey."

The President must dig himself out of this hole or face losing the hockey constituency forever. There's a political truism that might as well read like this: "As goes Caps Nation, so goes the actual, real-life nation." President Obama must be made to love hockey, and it seems fitting that Ted Leonsis be the one to do it.