We Need to Hear From You: RMNB 2014 Survey

Hey, guys. We need your help!

We’re going through a lot of changes as a blog. For us to figure out what to do next, we need to learn what’s working and what’s not. We’ve put together a short survey– 10 minutes, tops– that’ll help us do exactly that. (Plus, we really wanna settle the Chipotle/Qdoba argument.) If you could, please take a couple minutes to answer some questions for us.  We’d really really really appreciate it.

Please check out the RMNB 2014 Survey

<3 <3 <3


Bet: Ian Thinks Adam Oates Will Be Back Next Year

Ian and I were doing some blog biznass this morning when I learned something stunning. Ian actually believes Adam Oates will be back as head coach of the Capitals next season. This is astonishing, so we made a bet.

The Bet: Ian bets Peter that Adam Oates will be head coach of the Washington Capitals in 2014-15.

The Stakes: 77 cents, in pennies, and a $10 gift card to the burrito restaurant of the winner’s choice.

You guys are witnesses. I also want to point out that Ian is running a very cold streak in bets lately. Also also: Chipotle > Qdoba, all day, every day.

Continue Reading

Tagged with:

Making RMNB Last

Hey, can we talk?

We started RMNB in 2009 on a lark. Ian and I liked hockey a lot, and we liked making stuff and sharing it with the Internet, so we thought we could have some fun.

Mission accomplished. RMNB has been tons of fun. We’ve published about 3000 stories for about 3 million readers, and we are pleased beyond words about that. We never expected this level of success. We also also didn’t expect how much work it would be.

Among the whole team, we’ve spent somewhere around 15,000 hours (maybe more) working on RMNB. We’ve spent our own money on hosting and equipment and travel and giveaways and translations. We’ve made a little money off of t-shirts, but we’re deeply, deeply in the red.

To make RMNB sustainable, we need to generate enough revenue to offset our costs. To make RMNB rewarding for our contributors, we’ve got to compensate them. To make RMNB a disgustingly rich multinational multimedia conglomerate that can throw decadent parties and give away crazy swag, we’ve got to start selling advertisements.

Continue Reading


Regarding Voldemort


We’ve recently got a bunch of comments about “bringing back Voldemort.” I want to address them real quick.

For those of you unfamiliar, in December of 2010, RMNB replaced the normal design of our site with a collage of sad images (seen above). It was part of our “panic protocol” during the Caps’ pivotal eight-game losing streak under the harsh lights of HBO’s 24/7. The Caps ended that slump by switching from a successful, offense-focused system (which we at the time called “scoar moar goals”) towards a meeker, less successful, and much less fun “trap” style (which I now call “Beat Dat Beat Up“). As we restored the site back to cheerful red and blue, we didn’t yet know the real dark stuff was yet to come.

No, we won’t be bringing back Voldemort now or any time soon. For all their losses, the Washington Capitals of December 2010 were still much, much better than the Washington Capitals of March 2014. “Going dark” was our way of joking through one of those occasional and inevitable valleys among a whole bunch of peaks and making light of fan freak-outs.

What’s happening now is different. I don’t want to laugh it off.

Continue Reading


Not Hockey: Introduce Yourself

We’d like to think we’re building a community here, and that means you, dear reader, are an indispensable part of RMNB. Without you, we’re just blogging into the wind.

Would you please take a moment to introduce yourself in the comments below, adding a photo if you’ve got one. This whole thing goes a lot better when we can see each other’s faces and remember that there’s a real person on the other end of the comment thread.

You don’t have to use your real name, but I think it helps.

Tell us who you are, what you do, what you see, your favorite player, and what you want out of 2014. That way, once we all meet up for a party (soon), we’ll be able to put a face to the name, and that’ll be great.

The RMNB team will be participating below, so come say hi.

Tagged with:

The Most Popular RMNB Stuff of 2013


You’re not gonna be surprised which was RMNB’s most popular story of 2013. Out of almost 1200 posts this year, the one that garnered the most attention was our blow-by-blow recap of the meteor strike in Evgeny Kuznetsov’s hometown of Chelyabinsk, Russia, on Valentine’s Day. It was a weird story, one that we had a peculiar perspective on, and as a result it went viral to a degree I doubt we’ll ever see again.

But we wrote about a lot more than astrophysics this year, so let’s take a real quick stroll in the wayback machine to check out the stories you guys loved the most. This should be fun. See if you can guess what’s in the top five.

Continue Reading

Tagged with:

RMNB Wishes All Its Readers Happy Holidays!


Not a creature is stirring in our little corner of the blogosphere that doesn’t wish you and yours a happy holiday. Have a good one and we’ll see you back here in a couple days.

(P.S. tweet us your Caps-themed Christmas presents so we can be jealous.)

Tagged with:

Programming Note: PuckBuddys is (are?) Taking Over


I’ll be out of town on business this week, so Craig and Doug from the always-perfect PuckBuddys site will be taking over game recap duties. Through Friday’s game against the Devils, they’ll be sharing their take on the game that was.

I’m sorry that I’ll miss the first full week of Caps hockey in over half a year, but I’m delighted to have them take over the reins while I’m gone. Please go check out the PuckBuddys site, which is full of good writing even if you’re a breeder, and be nice to them while I’m away. Seriously, don’t embarrass me in front of the guests.


Russian Machine, Creative Commons, and Aaron Swartz


Effective immediately, all original content on RussianMachineNeverBreaks.com and its related sites is covered by the Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike license. This means you can share, copy, and remix anything we create — so long as it’s done with attribution and not for commerce. This license applies to our writing, our illustrations, our videos, and photos by our team.  It’s a lot of content (2000+ posts), so go crazy.

Continue Reading

Tagged with:

Clear Your Cache: We’ve Redesigned the Site


R.I.P. The Gray Thing 2009-2013

Happy hockey day. Peeking at RMNB today, you might notice we’ve made some changes. The new RMNB has a new main navigation along with a new design. It’s a little more toned down than the old design– with less Ovi and more focus on the things that you actually do on our site. See all our social stuff along the top, there? Ain’t it spiffy?

If you can’t see it or if it looks a little weird, clear your cache. You can hit CTRL + F5 if you’re on a PC. If you’ve got a Mac, just throw it in the trash and get a new one. You can probably afford it.

This is just the first step in a series of site improvements that we’ve been planning for a while. We’ll be doing a full redesign sometime in the near future. For now, we’ve got a bunch of new pages on the site, which you can check out by clicking around that pretty top nav. We’ve also put all our original content under a Creative Commons license, which you can read about later. When we started RMNB a few years ago, we didn’t expect anything like this level of success. We’re gonna keep working to make RMNB a rewarding experience for you guys.

Let us know your thoughts! Thanks!