<?xml version="1.0" encoding="UTF-8"?>
<rss version="2.0"
	xmlns:content="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/content/"
	xmlns:wfw="http://wellformedweb.org/CommentAPI/"
	xmlns:dc="http://purl.org/dc/elements/1.1/"
	xmlns:atom="http://www.w3.org/2005/Atom"
	xmlns:sy="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/syndication/"
	xmlns:slash="http://purl.org/rss/1.0/modules/slash/"
	>

<channel>
	<title>Russian Machine Never Breaks &#187; Brandon Oland</title>
	<atom:link href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/category/brandon-oland/feed/" rel="self" type="application/rss+xml" />
	<link>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com</link>
	<description>A cheerfully demented Washington Capitals site with a healthy fixation on Alex Ovechkin and his Russian bros. CRASH THE NET!</description>
	<lastBuildDate>Tue, 21 May 2013 23:55:28 +0000</lastBuildDate>
	<language>en-US</language>
	<sy:updatePeriod>hourly</sy:updatePeriod>
	<sy:updateFrequency>1</sy:updateFrequency>
	<generator>http://wordpress.org/?v=3.5.1</generator>
		<item>
		<title>Pens Will Host Caps in 2011 Winter Classic. Time For Payback!</title>
		<link>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2010/05/28/pens-will-host-caps-in-2011-winter-classic-time-for-payback/</link>
		<comments>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2010/05/28/pens-will-host-caps-in-2011-winter-classic-time-for-payback/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Fri, 28 May 2010 22:01:28 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russian Machine Never Breaks</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Brandon Oland]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[News]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[2011 Winter Classic]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Alex Ovechkin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[God I hate Pittsburgh]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Heinz Field]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Pittsburgh Penguins]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Sidney Crosby]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Terrible Towels]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Washington Capitals]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/?p=4603</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[When his queue frees up and motivation strikes, award-winning Carroll County Times&#8217; Features Writer Brandon Oland does columns for RMNB. After today&#8217;s announcement of the 2011 Winter Classic, Brandon just had something he had to get off his chest. The Washington Capitals will face the Pittsburgh Penguins in the latest edition of the hockey classic [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><em>When his queue frees up and motivation strikes, award-winning Carroll County Times&#8217; Features Writer Brandon Oland does columns for RMNB. After today&#8217;s announcement of the 2011 Winter Classic, Brandon just had something he had to get off his chest.</em></p>
<div id="attachment_4607" class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 254px"><a href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/sidney-crosby-terrible-towel.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-4607" title="Sidney Crosby Terrible Towel" src="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/sidney-crosby-terrible-towel-244x300.jpg" alt="Gary got his wish: Sidney Crosby and his Pittsburgh's idiotic fanbase will host the 2011 Winter Classic." width="244" height="300" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Gary got his wish: Sidney Crosby and his weeny terrible towel will be hosting the 2011 Winter Classic.</p></div>
<p>The Washington Capitals will face the Pittsburgh Penguins in the latest edition of the hockey classic at an outdoor arena.</p>
<p>The two teams will play on New Year&#8217;s Day 2011 at Heinz Field, home to the Pittsburgh Steelers.</p>
<p>This is an annoying development, of course, for the possibility that the Penguins fans will want to wave Terrible Towels at the hockey game. Terrible Towels are puny hand towels that Steelers fans wave with fury at home games.</p>
<p>So I have a suggestion for any Capital fans planning to make the trip to Pittsburgh. Capitals fans should come up with their own version of Terrible Towels that will mock and irk intellectually inferior Penguins fans to no end.</p>
<p>I propose every Capitals fan who travels to Pittsburgh should bring the biggest red beach towels they can find and wave them at tailgate parties. It would be a symbol of Washington&#8217;s financial superiority to rundown Pittsburgh. After all, beach towels are bigger and more expensive than hand towels.</p>
<p>If Penguins fans ask what you are doing, simply point out that you thought everyone was supposed to wave towels inside Heinz Field. Then wad up your towel and beat the Penguins fan over the head with it. What are they going to do? Strike back with a Terrible Towel?</p>
 
<span class = "facebook_like" style = " "><iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2010/05/28/pens-will-host-caps-in-2011-winter-classic-time-for-payback/&layout=standard&send=false&show_faces=false&width=450&action=like&colorscheme=light&locale=en_US&font=" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:px"></iframe></span>]]></content:encoded>
			<wfw:commentRss>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2010/05/28/pens-will-host-caps-in-2011-winter-classic-time-for-payback/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>8</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>The Significance Of Blogs In The Mainstream Media</title>
		<link>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2010/01/19/the-significance-of-blogs-in-the-mainstream-media/</link>
		<comments>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2010/01/19/the-significance-of-blogs-in-the-mainstream-media/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 19 Jan 2010 06:53:42 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russian Machine Never Breaks</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Brandon Oland]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Blogs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mainstream Media]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Newspapers]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/?p=898</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Allow me to break into the excellent coverage Peter provides on the Capitals to discuss the significance of blogs in the mainstream media. I am a newspaper reporter, so it may surprise many of you that I even know what a blog is. The general consensus of blogger nation seems to be that newspaper reporters [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><div id="attachment_904" class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 310px"><a href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/newspaper_boy_11256594754.gif1.png"><img src="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/01/newspaper_boy_11256594754.gif1-300x295.png" alt="CAPTION" title="newspaper_boy_11256594754.gif" width="300" height="295" class="size-medium wp-image-904" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Seriously. Someone buy this newspaper!</p></div>Allow me to break into the excellent coverage Peter provides on the Capitals to discuss the significance of blogs in the mainstream media.</p>
<p>I am a <a target="_blank" href="http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/4/4c/Front_page_movie_poster.jpg">newspaper reporter</a>, so it may surprise many of you that I even know what a blog is.</p>
<p>The general consensus of blogger nation seems to be that newspaper reporters don&#8217;t understand online media, and that&#8217;s why our industry is &#8220;dying.&#8221; I bring this up because the folks at <a target="_blank" href="http://www.camdenchat.com/2010/1/18/1256707/monday-bird-droppings">Camden Chat ripped me apart</a> for a <a target="_blank"  href="http://www.carrollcountytimes.com/articles/2010/01/17/sports/8_commentarys_oland.txt">negative column</a> I wrote about how much the Orioles are going to stink this year. Basically, one of the commenters said negative columns like mine are the reason why the print industry is dying.</p>
<p>Allow me this rebuttal. </p>
<p><span id="more-898"></span></p>
<p><a target="_blank" href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com">Russian Machine Never Breaks</a> is one of of the best focused local sports blogs you are going to find. My brother Ian is an outstanding designer who knows how to draw traffic to a Web site. The writers here are proven commodities who are giving you reasons to check in daily. Guess what? Unless Ian is stiffing me, which is entirely possible, we&#8217;re not making a dime. And without <a target="_blank" href="http://www.csnwashington.com/">Comcast</a>, <a target="_blank" href="http://www.washingtonpost.com">The Washington Post</a> and other news agencies who cover  and broadcast the Capitals on a daily basis, our fine bloggers would struggle to provide information.</p>
<p>Blogs are wonderful. I&#8217;ve contributed to several in the last five years both for company newspaper sites and independent ventures like this one.</p>
<p>But make no mistake: The print and broadcast journalism industries are still here providing the news and leading the fray. The information-hungry world needs all three, and hopefully we can find an advertising model that allows all three to function as this economy starts to turn around.</p>
<p>And I suppose I should finish this post with some sort of Capitals insight. Here&#8217;s what I&#8217;ve noticed lately: Mike Green scores more goals than Joe Reekie ever did. It&#8217;s remarkable.</p>
<p>Now <a target="_blank" href="http://russianmachineneverbreaks.spreadshirt.com">go buy a shirt</a> so my brother can pay me. I really want an <a target="_blank" href="http://www.apple.com/ipodtouch/features/">iPod Touch</a> and/or an <a "_blank" href="http://www.sportsauthority.com/product/index.jsp?productId=3369562&#038;CAWELAID=272011403">Andre Johnson T-shirt</a> (I&#8217;m a Redskins fan, but he&#8217;s my returning stud in keeper league fantasy football). I&#8217;m dependent on you guys for helping me get this stuff.</p>
 
<span class = "facebook_like" style = " "><iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2010/01/19/the-significance-of-blogs-in-the-mainstream-media/&layout=standard&send=false&show_faces=false&width=450&action=like&colorscheme=light&locale=en_US&font=" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:px"></iframe></span>]]></content:encoded>
			<wfw:commentRss>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2010/01/19/the-significance-of-blogs-in-the-mainstream-media/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Former Roommate Brandon Oland Shares His Thoughts On Corey Masisak &amp; The Demise Of The Washington Times Sports Section</title>
		<link>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/31/former-roommate-brandon-oland-shares-his-thoughts-on-corey-masisak-the-firing-of-the-washington-times-sports-section/</link>
		<comments>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/31/former-roommate-brandon-oland-shares-his-thoughts-on-corey-masisak-the-firing-of-the-washington-times-sports-section/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 31 Dec 2009 05:35:47 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russian Machine Never Breaks</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Brandon Oland]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Corey Masisak]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The Diamondback]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[The Washington Times Sports Section]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[University of Maryland]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/?p=432</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[[Editor's note: Brandon Oland is currently the Features Writer at the Carroll County Times. He has worked for the Frederick News Post's Sports Section, Interned at the USA Today &#038; has written for The UMD's Diamondback] During my freshman year at the University of Maryland, I shared a dorm room with Corey Masisak. Turns out [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div id="attachment_436" class="wp-caption alignright" style="width: 310px"><a href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/Corey_Masisak.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-436" title="Corey_Masisak" src="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/12/Corey_Masisak-300x208.jpg" alt="Washington Times Corey Masisak. On the Caps beat no more." width="300" height="208" /></a><p class="wp-caption-text">Washington Times Corey Masisak. On the Caps beat no more.</p></div>
<p><em>[Editor's note: Brandon Oland is currently the Features Writer at the Carroll County Times. He has worked for the Frederick News Post's Sports Section, Interned at the USA Today &#038; has written for The UMD's Diamondback]</em></p>
<p>During my freshman year at the University of Maryland, I shared a dorm room with Corey Masisak.</p>
<p>Turns out we had a lot in common. We wanted to be sports journalists. We wanted to work at the college newspaper. While many of our freshman cohorts were partying it up, Corey and I made it a priority to get the attention of editors at <a target="_blank" href="http://www.diamondbackonline.com/">The Diamondback</a>, the daily newspaper on campus.</p>
<p>Corey was a success from day one. He served as The Diamondback&#8217;s sports editor and football and basketball beat writer. He earned the respect of many and landed a job at T<a target="_blank" href="http://www.washingtontimes.com/">he Washington Times</a> after he graduated. He worked his way up to Capitals beat writer and did a tremendous job covering the team.</p>
<p>He tirelessly wrote stories for the print product. He kept up a <a target="_blank" href="http://www.washingtontimes.com/weblogs/in-the-room/">useful blog</a> I checked several times a week. He did everything asked of him, yet it wasn&#8217;t enough.</p>
<p>The Washington Times <a target="_blank" href="http://twitter.com/TWTSports/status/7208786524">announced mass layoffs Thursday</a>. I&#8217;m assuming Corey was one of them. <a target="_blank" href="http://www.sportsjournalists.com/">SportsJournalists.com</a> is reporting the entire sports staff got axed as The Washington Times tries to reinvent itself without a sports section.</p>
<p>The demise of The Washington Times sports section is not a surprise. After Monday night&#8217;s game, Bruce Boudreau addressed Corey&#8217;s fate at the end of his press conference:</p>
<p>&#8220;Corey, if this is your last game, I&#8217;d like to thank you for everything you&#8217;ve done in the covering of our team for the last couple of years,&#8221; Boudreau said, <a target="_blank"  href="http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/12/29/AR2009122902804.html">according to The Washington Post</a>.</p>
<p>I&#8217;m absolutely devastated for Corey. He loves sports journalism. He is passionate about hockey. I&#8217;ve seen far too many former coworkers and classmates lose their jobs in the last 18 months as the contracting print journalism industry sheds incredibly talented people.</p>
<p>Best of luck to Corey and all those affected.</p>
<p>[Also see: <a target="_blank" href="http://www.japersrink.com/2009/12/29/1223619/a-big-loss-in-a-season-of-wins">Japers' Rink</a> &#038; the <a target="_blank" href="http://voices.washingtonpost.com/dcsportsbog/2009/12/goodbye_to_the_times_sports_se.html">DC Sports Bog</a> for their heartfelt opinions on the firings as well.]</p>
 
<span class = "facebook_like" style = " "><iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/31/former-roommate-brandon-oland-shares-his-thoughts-on-corey-masisak-the-firing-of-the-washington-times-sports-section/&layout=standard&send=false&show_faces=false&width=450&action=like&colorscheme=light&locale=en_US&font=" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:px"></iframe></span>]]></content:encoded>
			<wfw:commentRss>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/31/former-roommate-brandon-oland-shares-his-thoughts-on-corey-masisak-the-firing-of-the-washington-times-sports-section/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>1</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Brandon&#8217;s Take: What Should the Capitals Do With Alex Semin?</title>
		<link>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/21/brandons-take-what-to-do-with-alex-semin/</link>
		<comments>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/21/brandons-take-what-to-do-with-alex-semin/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 22 Dec 2009 00:46:58 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russian Machine Never Breaks</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Brandon Oland]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Opinion]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Alex Semin]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Bob Evans]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Washington Capitals]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/?p=159</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Let&#8217;s say you worked as a manager at Bob Evans. One of your cooks is an aloof guy who rarely speaks to the waiters and waitresses. Every once in awhile he&#8217;ll overcook a burger and call in sick to work. But when he&#8217;s focused, he&#8217;s capable of making the best Wildfire Chicken dinner of anyone [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/images/what-to-do-with-alex-semin2.jpg" alt="What To Do With Alex Semin" style="border: solid 1px #00204d" /></p>
<p>Let&#8217;s say you worked as a manager at Bob Evans. One of your cooks is an aloof guy who rarely speaks to the waiters and waitresses. Every once in awhile he&#8217;ll overcook a burger and call in sick to work.</p>
<p>But when he&#8217;s focused, he&#8217;s capable of making the best Wildfire Chicken dinner of anyone in the entire chain of restaurants. Despite the cook&#8217;s shortcomings, the manager would do anything possible to keep the chef around.</p>
<p>Alexander Semin is the slightly flawed cook of the Washington Capitals. Sure, he makes mistakes. No, he&#8217;s not particularly adept at English. But he&#8217;s one of the league&#8217;s most dangerous goal scorers when healthy and motivated. He needs to be resigned.</p>
<p>I suppose you could argue that the Capitals would be best served trading him for a physical, stay-at-home defenseman or a goalie better than Jose Theodore (which would be just about anyone). But I think the current Capitals are the most fun team I can remember watching because of their propensity to score goals in bunches.</p>
<p>Remember the B.O. (Before Ovechkin, not body odor) era? Aside from Peter Bondra, the Capitals never seemed to be able to find complimentary scorers. It led to suspect power plays and way too many &#8220;dump and chase&#8221; hysterics.</p>
<p>Even if it means taking a serious salary cap hit and not being able to fix a back line that could use an established star, I think the Capitals should keep Semin. If there aren&#8217;t enough cooks in the kitchen, it&#8217;s much harder to be successful.</p>
 
<span class = "facebook_like" style = " "><iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/21/brandons-take-what-to-do-with-alex-semin/&layout=standard&send=false&show_faces=false&width=450&action=like&colorscheme=light&locale=en_US&font=" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:px"></iframe></span>]]></content:encoded>
			<wfw:commentRss>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/21/brandons-take-what-to-do-with-alex-semin/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>2</slash:comments>
		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Michael Nylander&#8217;s $4 Million Can Buy You&#8230;</title>
		<link>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/15/what-can-nylanders-4-million-buy-you/</link>
		<comments>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/15/what-can-nylanders-4-million-buy-you/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 15 Dec 2009 06:01:50 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Russian Machine Never Breaks</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Brandon Oland]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Hartford Whalers]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Michael Nylander]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Washington Capitals]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/?p=86</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[10 Major League Baseball players making the league minimum. 66,796 copies of EA Sport&#8217;s NHL 2010 video game for XBox. 666,666 copies of an autographed 8&#215;10 photo of Nylander in a Hartford Whalers uniform (currently retailing for $6 on eBay). 133,333 tickets to the Eagle Bank Bowl in Washington featuring UCLA vs. Temple (cheapest ticket [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<ul>
<li>10 Major League Baseball players making the league minimum.</li>
<li>66,796 copies of EA Sport&#8217;s NHL 2010 video game for XBox.</li>
<li>666,666 copies of an autographed 8&#215;10 photo of Nylander in a Hartford Whalers uniform (currently retailing for $6 on eBay).</li>
<li>133,333 tickets to the Eagle Bank Bowl in Washington featuring UCLA vs. Temple (cheapest ticket is retailing for $30 on Stubhub.com).</li>
<li>100 print sports reporters to cover the Washington Capitals (assuming the writers are making $40,000, a real stretch)</li>
</ul>
 
<span class = "facebook_like" style = " "><iframe src="http://www.facebook.com/plugins/like.php?href=http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/15/what-can-nylanders-4-million-buy-you/&layout=standard&send=false&show_faces=false&width=450&action=like&colorscheme=light&locale=en_US&font=" scrolling="no" frameborder="0" allowTransparency="true" style="border:none; overflow:hidden; width:450px; height:px"></iframe></span>]]></content:encoded>
			<wfw:commentRss>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2009/12/15/what-can-nylanders-4-million-buy-you/feed/</wfw:commentRss>
		<slash:comments>3</slash:comments>
		</item>
	</channel>
</rss>
