 |
On Tuesday night, CSN analyst and great head of hair Alan May took to Twitter to complain about his lack of a personalized t-shirt.
@alexsemin every one has a great MayDay tee, but me. Hook a brother up
— Alan May (@MayHockeyCSN) May 1, 2013
We’re on the case.
Happy playoffs, hockey people!
On this very special day, we’re releasing a bunch of new shirts to the RMNB store– and we’re sure you’ll love at least one of them. If you’re into Perreault’s post-game celebrations, The Wagon, or meteors, we’ve got a shirt for you. And if you hate Pennsylvania (and who doesn’t?), we’ve got you covered as well. Seven new shirts in all, in men’s and women’s cuts, all printed on the finest natural synthetic fabrics available.
Wwith Mother’s day coming up, all Women’s tees are 15% off. Just use the coupon code MOTHER2013 during check-out.
We’re real proud of this new batch of shirts. Take a look and let us know what you think!
“What’d you call me?” (GIF by jaybeagles)
Hockey players are accustomed to terrible nicknames; they’ve got a lot. The current iteration of the Washington Capitals includes Patsy (Aaron Volpatti), Crabber (Joey Crabb), and Carly (John Carlson). Now we know Steve Oleksy‘s too, though he won’t be happy with RMNB once his teammates read this. See: Oleksy’s lifelong nickname isn’t Stevie O (as head Adam Oates called him); it’s Binky. And we’ve got the story behind that.
“When I was younger, I was sick and I was in the hospital quite a bit,” Oleksy told me recently. “I called my pacifier my binky, and every time I started crying the nurses would tell my mom to put my binky in. She started calling me that, and then the kids at school caught on, and it just kind of grew with me.”
As a reminder to all of you hooligans to vote today, we’ve unveiled a new t-shirt in our store. While we all may have wildly different opinions on who we think would be best in the White House for the next four years, let’s all agree on this: Barack Obama is an amazing singer Voting Yes For Number 8. This finely printed red shirt will be available in our Spreadshirt store for today only. Check out the shirt, buy one or two or ten, and be the envy of all your friends.
Before you start hassling us да means yes in Russian. Here’s a bigger version of the graphic.
Listen: I know the Capitals are a regional team, drawing fans from Maryland and Virginia, in addition to the District. But Piney Orchard and Capital Centre are proof that the team’s roots are deep in the Old Line State. And it’s for fans from the great state of Maryland that we debut this new RMNB shirt.
As Caps fans, most of us were already aware that Matt Hendricks was awesome. Perhaps we were not aware until this season just how awesome he really was, but we’ve had our eyes opened one shootout stunner and monster playoffs shift at a time. As the games have gotten bigger, so has he. All-Star goaltenders everywhere have come to fear him, and superstars brace themselves when they see him about to finish a check.
In honor of the nickname Craig Laughlin coined for Hendy earlier in the season — “The Paralyzer” — we present our new Minnesota license plate inspired t-shirt, lovingly designed by Ian Oland. You can check the shirts out in our t-shirt store here. Also, shipping is free right now through May 8th when you place an order over $30. Just use the coupon code MOTHERSDAY12 at checkout.
The weather is getting nice, and we at RMNB thought you might need some new t-shirts to wear. Well, that and the whole playoffs thing.
And since I didn’t have anything to do with the making of these shirts, I can tell you this without reservation: These shirts are totally freaking awesome. Let me show you them.
People, we’ve got a ton of new shirts in the store.
There are 6 new shirts, featuring original artwork by Ian Oland and Rachel Cohen. These have been a labor of love by our talented art crew, so feast your eyes and maybe cover up your quivering naked torso.
And for today only, while America loses billions in lost productivity, we are discounting everything by one dollar. We’re also offering free shipping on all orders over $50 through Christmas (Coupon codes – US: SHIPFREEUS, Canada: CADSHIPFREE).
If you follow me the past jump, you can get a first look at our new bundles of joy.
RMNB’s New Rally Balloon T-Shirt. Click here to view all colors and sizes.
LaBarbera swipes at the Rally Balloon. (Photo credit: Ann Heisenfelt)
The Rally Balloon. It turned a struggling team– who had lost four straight, with one star benched and another under scrutiny, with an embattled head coach and a bunch of grumpy fans– into winners.
When the Capitals were down 2-1 in the second period, an unassuming red balloon floated out from the crowd. It hovered ominously twenty feet over Jason LaBarbera’s head. The annoyed Coyotes goaltender swiped at the ‘loon before knocking it up in the air with his stick. No biggie, right?
The Capitals promptly scored three inspired goals and defeated Phoenix 4-3.
First star of the game? Among fans it’s the #RallyBalloon. There’s now a RallyBalloon Twitter account, a rollicking Rally Balloon hashtag, and now our Rally Balloon T-Shirt.
To prepare for the playoffs, we at RMNB were compelled to revamp our store. Gone are the Bruce WTF, inSEMINation & We Want Wings tees. In their place we bring you five awesome, new designs. Peep the store and chat it up in the comments.
RMNB’s answer to the Wizznutzz’s jaw-dropping Agent Zero Metallic Gold Portrait Tees, the Game Over Portrait T-Shirt shows everyone’s favorite disrespected defenseman mugging for the ladies. The shirt comes in black and green, and with or without the psychological baggage of the Olympic snubbing. Also, for the first time ever, our Game Over graphics will be printed in a beautiful, space-age Metallic Silver. You can microwave a pizza on it!*
* Please don’t microwave a pizza on it.
RMNB depends on reader participation. If you’ve got news, photos, or a cool story, send it our way.
All original content on russianmachineneverbreaks.com is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported (CC BY-NC-SA 3.0)-- unless otherwise stated or superseded by another license. You are free to share, copy, and remix this content so long as it is attributed, done for noncommercial purposes, and done so under a license similar to this one.
