Over the last few weeks, we’ve seen RMNB t-shirts literally everywhere as the Capitals try to march deep into the postseason. We’ve seen them in our Twitter mentions, in our Instagram tags, at Kettler, and at our local Frederick Wegmans. Basically, you guys are insane people and we love you for it.
We were thinking as a group on how to thank you. And this was what we came up with: MAKE MOAR SHIRTS.
Above, you’ll see our first new design, the Sorry, Penguin tee. It’s inspired by this wonderful Ovechkin commercial. If you like your Deadguins tee, then you’ll love wearing this ditty under your jersey too.
The city of brotherly love, Philadelphia, has a history of less-than-brotherly behavior when it comes to sports.
Most recently, we’ve seen Philadelphia fans pelt athletes with plastic bracelets after a scary near-injury, but there have also been snowball-struck Santas, Michael Irving lying on the field with a career-ending injury while Eagles fans boo, and the constant threat of ballistic weaponized batteries.
RMNB commemorates the spirit of Philadelphia fandom in our newest t-shirt.
Over the last six years, we’ve sold enough t-shirts to cover the naked torso of every man and woman living in Brunswick, Maryland. This happened despite the fact our Spreadshirt shop was a usability nightmare. You guys struggled though tiny buttons, even tinier text, and never-ending scrolling to buy merch. We really appreciate your support (I don’t know if we can ever say that enough), which is why I was tasked with redoing our merch store over the weekend.
Ten hours and five Red Bulls later, we have a responsive, easy-to-use t-shirt store that allows you to begin shopping by our designs, not our products. Plus, checking out is a breeze on your phone or tablet.
We’ve also created three new t-shirts for you and brought back a few old favorites. We’re also now offering sizes larger than 2XL, which has long been a request.
When Dmitry Orlov scored his first NHL goal four years ago, Peter blurted out something brilliant on the RMNB account. To this day, I still don’t know how he thought of it.
SCOARlov! First NHL Goal!!!
— RMNB (@russianmachine) January 15, 2012
Since then, Orly doesn’t score mere goals. He SCOARLOVs. On Saturday night, we got our first Orly goal in nearly two years. There was no guarantee we’d see that after a badly broken wrist in the World Championship threatened Orlov’s career. Our new t-shirt commemorates that perseverance and welcomes the many scoarlovs yet to come.
Halloween has come and gone, which can means now we prepare for snowy days, roasting turkeys, and the arrival of ear-splitting annoying carols on forever loops in retail shops. The holiday season is here!
To properly celebrate, RMNB is proud to present its first ever Ugly Holiday Sweater!
Alex Ovechkin, TJ Oshie, Evgeny Kuznetsov. With the injury to Nicklas Backstrom that kept him out of the preseason and first few games of the regular season, Kuznetsov soon found himself centering the top line with Ovechkin and Oshie. And the result so far has been magical. In five games, the top line has combined for 16 points and led the Caps to a 4-1 start.
We wondered what nickname our new top line should have. RMNB reader Andrew Dionne came through in the clutch.
— Andrew Dionne (@sentientcheese) October 18, 2015
Saturday night, I watched in horror as the Anaheim Ducks lost in game seven to the Chicago Blackhawks 5-3. I, the sadistic Caps fan that I am, was rooting for Bruce Boudreau to make it to the Stanley Cup Finals because of how much he did for this area while he coached Washington and Hershey. Instead Bruce’s team collapsed in another big game. He was so tantalizingly close.
Pro Hockey Talk described Bruce’s futility in game sevens, and it’s pretty much the most depressing thing you’ll ever read.
No matter what happens Wednesday, the Washington Capitals have had a fantastic season and two dramatic playoff series we’ll all remember. Along the way, we’ve learned a new phrase uttered by one of our favorite Russians, we’ve closed a coliseum, and we even saw our beloved goaltender go into beast mode.
With all the special projects we’ve done this season, there hasn’t been much time for shirts. Today we have five. Hopefully, you’re going to love them.
When we started RMNB in 2009, we didn’t have high expectations. A couple readers and a few laughs would’ve been enough. Then things got a little out of hand, and we became one of the biggest unaffiliated hockey blogs out there.
It’s been a blast. We love it. Have you seen the parties?
But we didn’t expect how much work it would be to grow the way we have. For Ian and me, RMNB is like a second job. Plus, we’ve got escalating hosting costs, licenses to purchase, hardware to do the work, and contributors to support. And don’t forget an upcoming, mobile-friendly redesign of the site. (We are very excited about that!)
Getting all that stuff costs money, and to be honest we don’t make a lot. Advertisements cover some of hosting, and t-shirts keep our heads above water, but we’re not able to grow– or even sustain our current pace.
So we’re passing around the hat. (Hey, it was your idea.) Here’s the deal: If you donate $25 or more, you’ll get the most popular RMNB t-shirt in history before it goes away forever.
There are a bunch of perks, but the t-shirt is really rad. Still– any amount would help. Whatever you can spare will keep RMNB alive for years to come.
Russian Machine Never Breaks is not associated with the Washington Capitals; Monumental Sports, the NHL, or its properties. Not even a little bit.
All original content on russianmachineneverbreaks.com is licensed under Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported (CC BY-NC-SA 3.0)– unless otherwise stated or superseded by another license. You are free to share, copy, and remix this content so long as it is attributed, done for noncommercial purposes, and done so under a license similar to this one.