The Awesome Index: Mutant Shootout, Roads, and Barry

Eliot J Schechter

Photo: Eliot J. Schechter

Alright, lemme just start with this, because if I don’t I won’t be doing the Awesome Index right.

The Caps haven’t lost a game in #rego in fifteen days. That one on December 2nd was kind of a lame one too. The Caps’ record ain’t bad. That’s awesome.

I’ve got some more awesome stuff for you below, including my 2014 “best of” list.

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How Will The KHL Get Through Russia’s Economic Crisis?

dmitry-chernyshenko

Sochi’s Olympic boss Dmitry Chernyshenko will face the hardest challenge in the KHL’s history in his first year as president. (Photo: Sergey Kuznetsov / RIA Novosti)

Russia’s financial crisis is in full throttle as the ruble fell below 65 to one dollar (as opposed to 33 one year ago), while Russia’s main export, oil, has fallen below 60 dollars per barrel for the first time since May 2009.

The changes in the economy will affect Russian hockey.

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tom-wilson-backy-dad

In episode one of The Road To The Winter Classic, EPIX brought us into the luxury apartment of Caps forwards Tom Wilson and Michael Latta. It was the best segment of the night– probably because their apartment wasn’t so luxurious as we might have thought.

Not-Liev Schreiber described the design of Wilson and Latta’s bachelor pad as somewhere between “minimalist and utilitarian.” If your ping pong table is also your dinner table, that’s pretty accurate.

“I roast him on it a lot,” Wilson joked.

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On Tuesday night, as EPIX’s The Road To The Winter Classic began, the Caps began what became the longest shootout in NHL history. The scheduling conflict forced fans to make a difficult decision: reality TV or live hockey. For those who stuck with the live hockey, they got a shootout that went a record twenty rounds, five more than the previous record, which also belonged to the Caps. Nicklas Backstrom and Alex Ovechkin actually shot twice in the losing effort.

Karl Alzner, Michael Latta, Nate Schmidt, Brooks Orpik, John Carlson, and Tom Wilson all got their first career shootout attempts in the same game.

With all the wackiness on the ice and the game determined not to end, the Caps turned to a late-game baseball tradition to influence the outcome: rally helmets.

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ovechkin-back-tattoos

You’ve been missed, Ovechkin back tattoos.

Did you guys watch the first episode of Road to the Winter Classic? We did! (If you didn’t, here’s how you can watch it now.)

A lot went down. Teows went to the quiet room, Trotz got in a spat with Devorski, Ovi’s back tattoos came back, and the Caps wiseguys stole the show. Come relive the memories with me and Ian, who almost agree about it.

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Eliot J Schechter

Photo: Eliot J. Schechter

Kind of a snoozer in Sunrise. The way the Washington Capitals played against the Florida Panthers was so button-up and boring I was waiting for the dowager countess of Grantham to say something snarky. No team wanted to win this one, and then things went completely apenuts in the shootout.

Mike Green choked up the puck to Scottie Upshall to give Derek McKenzie a layup, making it 1-0 for the Panthers going into the first intermission. Troy Brouwer tied it on the power play in the second, getting the puck back after a block by Willie Mitchell. A washed-out kicked goal by Brooks Laich meant we were headed for overtime, which was exciting enough I guess, but no result.

Prepare yourself for the shootout bullet epic!

  • Fehr didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Huberdeau didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Backstrom didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Bjugstad didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Kuznetsov didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Boyes didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Ovechkin PUT THE BISCUIT IN THE BASKET.
  • Jokinen also put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Brouwer didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Kopecky didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Latta didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • My god this is going long. Epix show is almost over by now.
  • Barkov didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Brooks PUT THE BISCUIT IN THE BASKET.
  • Bolland also put the biscuit in the basket. Harumph.
  • Johansson didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Flash didn’t put the biscuit in the basket. He burned the biscuit.
  • Schmidt didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Upshall didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Ward PUT THE BISCUIT IN THE BASKET.
  • MacKenzie also put the biscuit in the basket. It never ends
  • Carlson PUT THE BISCUIT IN THE BASKET.
  • Bergenheim put the biscuit in the basket. This is my hell.
  • Beagle didn’t put the biscuit in the basket, but shoulda been a biscuit-delivering beagle.
  • Hayes didn’t put the biscuit in the basket. Life is meaningless and full of pain.
  • Green didn’t didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Campbell didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Chimera’s biscuit missed the basket by a mile.
  • Gudbranson didn’t put the biscuit in the basket. You can’t put a biscuit in the 5-hole.
  • Wilson didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Ekblad didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Niskanen didn’t put the biscuit in the basket because the stupid crossbar.
  • Kulikov didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • BORPIK PUT THE BISCUIT IN THE BASKET!!!!
  • Olsen didn’t put the biscuit in the basket. 17 rounds down.
  • Alzner didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Mitchell didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Backstrom, part II, didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Jokinen, part II, didn’t put the biscuit in the basket. I no longer fear death.
  • Ovechkin didn’t put the biscuit in the basket.
  • Bjudgstad put the biscuit in the basket! WINNER. FINALLY. I’M OKAY WITH THIS.

Panthers beat Caps 2-1 in the longest shootout I can remember!

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episode-one-epix

The first episode of Epix Presents the Road to the Winter Classic is below.

Hit play and let’s chat in the comments. It’ll be a blast.

Go Caps.

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Photo: @CapitalsPR

Before the Caps and Panthers faced off in Sunrise, Alex Ovechkin, in those ridiculous yellow spandex shorts, met up with some joe schmo during warmu… OMG, that’s Bobby Orr!

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green-stick

Sometimes I hate writing about individual plays, because some people think it makes the man. It doesn’t. Even when John Scott blows by Brooks Orpik for a goal.

So when I show you this Mike Green turnover, I want you to remember that Green has been the Capitals best defender this season and I’m 90% writing about this because of what happened afterwards.

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road2

The Road to the Winter Classic debuts tonight at 10 PM ET on a network called EPIX. You almost certainly don’t have EPIX, so you may have some anxiety about how to watch.

Let us help you.

Because the channel isn’t everywhere (read: anywhere), you can catch free online using a whole bunch of sources. We’re going to try to embed the episode right here on RMNB. But if you want to watch it time-shifted/on demand/whenevs, you’re gonna need a free trial subscription. You should probably do that now.

Now, here’s the skinny.

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