On October 10, 2013, In Game Recap, By Peter Hassett
Derpfaces akimbo (Photo: Patrick McDermott)
It has been a long, five days since the last Washington Capitals game. The world just feels different now, ya know? The temperature dropped 40 degrees for one thing. Alex Ovechkin surrendered the scoring lead to a tween for another. No matter: the Carolina Hurricanes came to town and we finally got our hockey back. If you were looking for an even-strength exhibition, whoops.
Jason Chimera scored– doesn’t matter how; he just did. Elias Lindholm scored the first goal of his career in the second, a weird one that bounced off of John Carlson’s skate.
Ugh, I hate weird goals.
Alex Ovechkin scored a weird goal by deflecting Steve Oleksy’s shot, introducing all kinds of brownian motion that Khudobin couldn’t savvy. Soon after that, Alex Semin tied the game by converting a 5-on-3 pretty much instantly.
The Capitals defense reasserted its crumminess in the third, as John Erskine (6’4″, 220 lbs.) was unable to box out Nathan Gerbe (basically Rudy from the movie Rudy).
On September 24, 2013, In Preseason, By Peter Hassett
The Washington Capitals will play their Metropolitan Division neighbors, the Carolina Hurricanes, five times this season. That means five wacky nights of Alex Semin vs Alex Ovechkin. Greater Sasha and Sasha Minor bashing skulls and chewing bubble gum times five! What will happen? Will Semin take a restraining penalty? Will he smoke cigarettes outside the team bus? Will it be awko taco between Semin and Grabo? Will Semin get sassed by Troy Brouwer? Let’s hope for yesses across the board.
Game one is coming up soon, and the rest are evenly spaced out through the season:
THU OCT 10, 2013
TUE DEC 3, 2013
FRI DEC 20, 2013
THU JAN 2, 2014
THU APR 10, 2014
Troy Brouwer’s return to the score sheet for the first time since March 30th came in three parts. First was the power play goal, a zippy shot from the slot set up by Mike Ribeiro. Then came the empty-netter, in spite of Alex Semin’s cross-check, sealing the deal with only seconds to spare. And finally came the trash talk: Troy Brouwer letting ex-teammate and international man of mystery Alex Semin know what he thought of — well something, I guess. Lipreading is not our bag. If lipreading is your bag, give it a try in the comments below.
Alex Semin has signed a highly lucrative contract with the Carolina Hurricanes for 7 million dollars a season over the next 5 years. The contract is a serious payday for a player whose skill has distinguished him in recent years.
Semin has 8 goals and 22 assists this season.
The Carolina Hurricanes have signed a highly ludicrous contract with Alex Semin for 7 million dollars a season over the next 5 years. The contact is a serious overpayment for player whose skill will be declining distinctly in those years.
Mark Gandler is always good for a pot stirring. As an agent for Alex Semin, Gandler has rarely hesitated to drop a bombastic statement about his client or his critics. With Semin moved to the Carolina Hurricanes, playing pretty well, and pulling in a cool prorated $7 million for 48 games of work, Gandler must have figured it was his time to speak. In an interview with Sovetsky Sport’s Pavel Lysenkov, Gandler talks about how great Semin is doing in Raleigh, how underappreciated he was in DC, and why the Washington Capitals are so bad this year.
Tuesday morning at 7:25, former Capital Alex Semin got his wake-up call courtesy of Elliot in the Morning. EITM’s resident mama Diane quarterbacked the call, gently chiding Semin for sleeping through morning practice. After a few monosyllabic grunts, Semin hung up. Twelve hours later, he set up Joe Corvofor the game-winning goal. #BlameEITM.
On Tuesday, Alex Semin finally earned a point against his former team, an assist on Joe Corvo’s first period goal. But one nightmare shift in the second period threatened to spoil Sasha’s whole night.
Right after a faceoff, Alex Ovechkin shot the puck, the blade of his stick catching Semin flush in the cheek during his follow-through. Ovi’s ex-BFF fell to the ice like a sack of vodka. When Semin got up, he had a bright red mark on the right side of his face.
For the first time in 290 days, Alex Semin, the 5th greatest goal scorer in Washington Capitals history, was back in his old barn. Now wearing visitors white, the 28-year-old forward was booed each time he touched the puck. Despite four shots on goal, Semin finished the game without a goal.
Here are my 28 favorite Semin-related photos from the night.