Screengrab via @CarrottBazooka

Since Alex Ovechkin has opted out of the All-Star Weekend (and has better things to do anyway), Dennis Wideman is now Washington’s lone representative in Ottawa. While Wideman is perhaps slightly less likely to don a hat and sunglasses and do trick shots, he’s a Capital, so we love him all the same. We’ll be covering Wideman’s foray into the glamorous life of an All-Star, so check back for updates, because let’s face it, you’re already bored without hockey.

Dennis Wideman was picked in the 15th round with the second-to-last pick that could be used on a defenseman, before only Canucks defenseman Alexander Edler. This means that we can get hipster now if we want and call him underrated. We knew Dennis Wideman when he wasn’t cool. Logan Couture was picked last overall and won a brand new caaaaarrrrr! Somehow it just wasn’t the same without Ovechkin there laughing and taking pictures.

Best Moments

• Pavel Datsyuk went first overall to Team Chara. Erik Karlsson got picked first for Team Alfredsson because he babysits Alfie’s kids, apparently.
• Alfie got confused about what round it was multiple times, leading to excellent cutaways of him asking everyone around him.
• Do the Leafs suck? I feel unsure. I wish that someone would have clarified this.

• Carey Price, clearly not expecting to be picked by a Bruin and a Leaf, had a mouthful of water when he was picked by Team Chara, and spent a good thirty seconds remembering how to swallow. It wasn’t an actual spit-take, but it was close.
• James Duthie somehow talked to Tim Thomas about the White House scandal without ever once actually mentioning what happened. Because, you know, he wouldn’t want to distract from the event at hand.

Best Quotes

• Joffrey Lupul on being booed every time he took the podium: “I like it. I don’t want to be cheered in Ottawa anyway.”
• Jason Spezza: “I owe Malkin 20 bucks. I told him he’d get picked before me.”
• Carey Price: “Is Z going for offense or defense? Wait remember, there’s no defense.”
• Tonight in unintentional rhymes: “Our third pick…Jonathan Quick.”
• Jarome Iginla to Patrick Kane: “Hey, what’s up man?” Kane: “Yeah, you too.”

via penslove.tumblr.com

• Chara to Tyler Seguin after making him wait till the second-to-last round: “Hug it out?”
• Cody Hodgson on ending up on Team Chara “It wasn’t my choice.” Pained face.
• Jason Spezza and Erik Karlsson discussing Sedin mythology: “I wonder if him and his brother will have any chemistry in the game?” “Doubtful.” “Aliens.” “They know where to pass the puck without even talking. It’s insane.”
• Alfredsson on Marion Gaborik being picked by Team Chara: “We were hoping Gaborik would be left, but Hank said you can’t score on him anyway.”

Important Questions

• Do they know who each team is going to draft beforehand, or do they just have two of each sweater for everyone?
• Who is most desperately in need of a haircut: Letang, Stamkos, or Hartnell? Discuss.
• What do you call a person who lives in Ottawa? Is it Ottawan? Ottawaian? Ottauan?