Hit em for Beagle: John Erskine vs Arron Asham (Photo credit: Rob Carr)

The Pittsburgh Penguins’ first appointment in D.C. might also mark the beginning of drastic reformulation for the Washington Capitals. This was also the first meeting between Sidney Crosby and Alex Ovechkin in 335 days and Crosby’s first date in D.C. since his concussion. Lots of hype, very little offense. Here’s how it went down:

Arron Asham hooked up Craig Adams for a lay up made even easier by some bad D from Orlov and Schultz. Chimera tied it up in the second with a blind backhand. Chris Kunitz beat everyone to give the Pens the go-ahead goal. The Caps just didn’t shoot. Pens beat Caps 2-1.

• Offense, baby. The Capitals were without a shot on goal for half of the first period. There was no offense whatsoever until Coach Dale Hunter combined Ovechkin, Backstrom, and Knuble for the first time in a long time (the first under his regime). That shift fired three shots, but the line disintegrated in the second before returning briefly in the third.
• We are witnessing a sea change in Caps’ systems, but we’ve got no perspective yet; we’re just too close and it’s too darn slow. More forechecking– yeah, that’s obvious. As is some increased defensive involvement by forwards and an inching towards man-t0-man defense. But it’s super duper early in the Hunter regime, and these things will be revealed in time. It’s fascinating to watch. Also painful.
• HITS. It’s an awful stat, tallied by feckless trolls in darkened corners, full of lies and whispers. But whatever. Final tally was Caps 43, Pens 28– making this game only slightly less violent than Robocop 2.
• Alex Ovechkin set up Nick Backstrom for a monster shot that was either the save of Marc Andre-Fleury‘s career or a flukey deflection off the shaft of his stick. Yeah, it’s the latter. [UPDATE: MAF confirmed the puck went off the post, not his stick.]
• What kinda cereal will you find in Jason Chimera‘s breakfast nook? I need to know. The Capitals leading scorer (jeezus, still???) recorded another tonight– using his patented blind/backhand/how-the-hell-did-that-work shot to the far side. If you check Chimmer’s hockey reference page (which I recommend just for the ad…), that gives Chimmer 10 goals after 24 games– tied with last year’s total and putting him 7 off his career best.
• We called this one: John Erskine challenged Arron Asham to a fight, and Asham accepted. It was a monster brawl with Big John emerging the winner by a margin. Props to Asham for stepping up, more props to Erskine for defending his boy Jay Beagle, who is still nursing a not-concussion concussion. Let’s consider this matter settled. Watch the fight:

• Giveawayapalooza. As the Capitals struggle to reassemble their puck-possession, it’s a feeding frenzy for the other team. The Caps coughed up the puck 13 times, most of them in the first period alone. Let’s keep an eye on this stat and turnovers in general, as they might be a proxy for growing pains in coming weeks.
• Alex Ovechkin: 1 shot, 10 hits. Would that we could reverse those stats.
• Nick Backstrom was a faceoff machine (never breaks). He won 15 of 17 faceoffs.

Ugg. Buddy, you’re killing me. (Photo credit: Mitchell Layton)

Joe B suit of the night

If you need this game boiled down, here it is: shots were 35-17, the lowest count of the Caps’ season. No matter what exciting systems changes or boosts to morale Coach Hunter brings, this team is an offensive non-entity for now. The power play offered a grand total of 1 shot on 2 opportunities. Only five players fired more than one shot, and two of them were Mike Knuble.

But there are bright spots we cannot ignore. Roman Hamrlik damaged the team not at all from his seat in the press box. Alex Semin didn’t commit a penalty. These are the little victories.

The Caps didn’t get blown out by the Pens, so that’s something. No, really. The Capitals are slowly emerging from interregnum, with all of the civil unrest that comes with it. Meanwhile, the Penguins are the best in the East– firing on all cylinders– with a star player in ascent.  This game was white-knuckle tense, and that’s a testament to … well, something. We’ll let you know in May.

Winter has come.

Saturday is Senators night in D.C. See you then!

Heeeeeere’s Doug Johnson of PuckBuddys fame. Tweet his face.

The Pre-Game: I think it was Benjamin Disraeli who said “Sometimes cities just suck.” Or maybe it was Don Rickles. We’re getting our historical figures mixed up.

Look, there’s nothing that stinks about San Diego, the actual place. It’s lovely. Or Phoenix, for that matter, if it weren’t for all the whack-a-doodles. Vancouver: now there’s a dandy city for you! If you can just get over all the residents piously reminding you just precisely how dandy it is.

On the other end, there are places like Mogadishu, a city that, I can comfortably assure you, sucks. Or vacation paradise Pripyat!  – home to the entombed Chernobyl perpetual light bulb. Pyongyang. Philadelphia.

Then we come to the middle ground: decent places inhabited by truly awful organizations. Pittsburgh comes to mind. Hoorah, it’s beautiful and their food isn’t too toxic and the local rumor is that there’s even a museum or something. But it’s also home to the rat burrow of unctuous fink Richard Mellon Scaife and his poisonous heirs, and the ‘Terrible Towel’, which we rank as only just below Scaife as scabes-inducing. The Pittsburgh Penguins… and Dan Bylsma. Think about that for a moment: both the Penguins AND Bylsma (and his douche-hat) compressed into one geographic point. That single distinction alone  is enough to push Pittsburgh to new title holder: Epicenter of Suck.

The Puck Drop

Every game matters. Pens games matter more. This game matters very much more.

Unless you’re living in a cave on Mars with your fingers in your ears, or are Alex Ovechkin,you understand that the swap of Coach Mustard for Coach Hunter has scrambled the Capitals squad at an inopportune time. Yes, everyone wants to be on their best behavior for the new teacher (was that a goal, Nicky?), and no, everyone clearly still does not understand what their role is on the ice (*coughWidemancough*), and whoops!, now all of a sudden players are actually expected to perform or else. (Don’t ask who or what.)

But this is not the time for scrambling. It is the time for righteous beatdowns of those self-entitled prigs in Pittsburgh. But are we ready? Ugh, I cannot believe I have to write this next section.

What Makes them Hot

Jordan Staal

1: Don’t Make Me Do This: A bunch of stuff. Players, mostly. Jordan Staal (12G 6A, plus-4), hatched somewhere in Canada, continues to prove the cynical criminality of the Staal breeding experiment. Shut out against the Rangers, and a little dry of late, he’s still a damn hard skater, one who rarely gives up and is quick to take advantage of weak defense (ruh-roh.) James Neal (14G 11A, minus-1) and vampire Kris Letang (3G 16A, plus-5) are also showing their mettle. We say vampire given Letang’s punishment from the Habs’ Max Pacioretty last Saturday, only to rise from the dead to score the GWG. Vampire or zombie? Let’s let his hair be the judge. Add to that Pascal Dupuis, Tyler Kennedy and a raft of other flightless birds that are just messing things up. They clearly command play in their zone and at the other end of the blue line, which gives us pause.

Nobody in particular

2: Really! I Can’t Do This!  Self-appointed Captain of the whiners, Sidney Crosby, is once more up to his soulless robotic ways. Scoring, hitting, scoring, smiling vacantly for the cameras. There is not enough room in Heaven or on this Earth to heap enough scorn on Sidney Crosby and his media-whoring ways. Unfortunately, on this plane of existence we need to contain him on the ice.

Hero-coach Hunter squired squads against Crosby in the early days, meaning a few years ago. “We had to put a checking line against him and pay special attention – he still scored points and goals — we limited him, anyways,” Hunter said this week.

Solution? Remember what teams did two years ago once they had to face the Ovech-ka-juggarnaut? They swarmed and gobbled him up. Gobble up Sidney Crosby this Thursday, Capitals. Unwrap him, devour him, and throw what’s left into an acid bath.

Dan Bylsma

3: For the Love of God, Please Stop! No! There is no amount of torture that will force me to admit that Dan Bylsma is a decent coach. I mean: hardly a decent human being. Like Coach Boudreau said a while back, can you really imagine Coach Douche-Hat “playing” with anyone, let alone his offspring, during the holidays? Nice staged photo op, jerk. How about you use everyone else in your life as a prop for your own mealy-mouthed self-aggrandizement? Oh wait! You’re doing the Movember thing? Really? Moustaches around the nation have done great work for raising money. But no moustache has spoken truer than that spiral cut ham rotting on Bylsma’s lip. Quoting: “Dan Bylsma’s moustache to world: ‘I hate you, and am cutting myself off from all human contact.’”

Yet he keeps winning, and keeping his stars in check. Why is there no moustache justice in this world?

What Makes Them Not

1: We Got a Warning Light. The Fetid Stink Birds have allowed only 63 goals this season, compared with our 75. Their win percentage is better, their players are performing while ours are floundering. So what’ the ‘Not’ here?

Crosby @ MSG (Photo: Reuters)

Let the H8trs rip me up, but I’m not convinced Pittsburgh is much more than a well-oiled one-trick machine. There’s no juggling like we’ve had, or locker-room turmoil (that we know of), or serious disruptions. But they’re still only a few games ahead of the Caps. This isn’t whistling past the graveyard, but acknowledgment of a truth that seems to have gotten lost lately: the Caps, almost entirely from head to tail, are the best NHL collection of talent in the last decade. Maybe not this game, or the next, but quality is going to start to shine through. As we’ve seen before, the Penguins will rise, then fall, then settle into meh; I believe they’re already showing signs of this now by their play. If I were a bookie in Vegas, I would see the warning light flashing from Pittsburgh, and adjust accordingly.

2: We Got a Red Alert. Think back to the days when the Caps would ‘get up’ for the big game. OK…I’ll give you a moment.

There! Got it? When they played like the Caps of 2009? When everyone on the bench would perform, swarming in the Dzone, crashing the net in theirs? Good…hold that image in your mind. With the exception of the newish Caps (and not all of them, as we think Halpy has been up and on his toes from the very start), our team remembers that, too. That’s the image they’re holding in their minds. That’s the visualization of performance they’re seeing and reliving.

James Neal

There’s no game bigger than this, and they know it’s happening in front of their loyal hometown. There’s no need to spur us – the team or the fans – to Unleash the Fury this game, as it begins fury unleashed, and only gets uglier from there. Red Rally Balloon? Rock the Red? It’s a Red Town Thursday, and we’re here to eat Pittsburgh’s lunch and steal their cookie.

3: We Got a Time Bomb Ticking. Dumptruck Arron Asham decided to give our Jay Beagle a pounding he wouldn’t forget. Or would, apparently if Asham had his way. As in: men with concussions don’t really remember what happened to them in the first place. In our book Arron Asham is no better than a drunk driver. No, he’s worse, actually: someone supposedly in control of his facilities (or what passes for them) who intentionally chooses to send a man to the hospital with a swollen brain injury. Nice going, Asham.

Beagle may not remember, but we do. Asham: you are a horrible human. We are watching you. There’s a timebomb ticking… and you’re not going to like it when it goes off.

The OT Shoot Out: Of all things that gave us heart this week, it was GMGM’s quick dismissal of Swedish star Mattias Sjögren. Apparently unsatisfied with Hershy Bear’s play, he sulked back to Sverige this week, fuming that he wasn’t getting enough NHL play. McPhee’s response: in a word, go. If you’re quitting on us, go. Begone. Away with you.

This, even more than Boudreau’s dismissal, has given us heart that the head office is in this to win it.

The games begin Thursday at Verizon. Come be with us to cheer on the Caps.

And remember, Pittsburgh:tick-tick-tick-tick…

Editor’s note: Download and print out some DALE signs. Like a billion of em. Make it rain like Newsies.

Photo credit: Gene J. Puskar

Thursday’s game between the Penguins and Capitals was an exciting affair, but it was the third period fight between Jay Beagle and Arron Asham that got people talking.

After roughing Kris Letang, Jay Beagle was approached by Arron Asham, a known fighter with more than 70 bouts on his rap sheet according to hockeyfights.com. The fight left Jay Beagle apparently knocked out, bleeding on the ice, and requiring help to get up. Asham skated away from the fight and made pro-wrestling-style gestures that could translate as “it’s over, he’s asleep.”

Beagle spit out blood, pulled out a tooth, and retreated to the locker room. As Beagle got up, Asham banged his stick from the penalty box out of respect. Arron and Jay served matching major penalties, Beagle doing so from off ice.  Also served by Beagle was the original two-minute penalty for roughing Letang. Asham was not assessed an instigator penalty.

We do not yet know the severity of Jay Beagle’s injury.

Here’s the fight:

Following the game, Asham took a lot of blame– some of it from us– for taunting and grandstanding after injuring a player. Alex Ovechkin said of the fight:

[Beagle is] not a fighter; it’s not his job to fight. I don’t know, it looked kind of not respectful for players on [a] different team. I don’t know what people think, but I think it’s not respectful.

Speaking to the Washington Times, defenseman Karl Alzner added:

It’s classless. But I know that happens in fights. It’s really crappy to see. Have some class a little bit, ya know?

…

That’s the way Beags is. He’s not going to back down from anybody. It’s unfortunate the way it happened. Hopefully he’s not out for too long. Asham’s doing his job. But I didn’t see what it did, but if he did do something, I expect more from him.

Aware of the criticism to his taunt, Arron responded:

It’s unfortunate the way the fight ended. Obviously I want to win. I don’t want to go out there and hurt anyone. My gestures at the end there, I was into the game. It was uncalled for. Classless on my part. I think those guys over there know that I’m not that type of guy to be going off. It was a big game you know. I wanted to get my bench going. Classless move on my part.

Where do we go from here?

For those allegations of classlessness, Asham gets mercy. He was contrite without being forced, and he faced his criticism head-on, which you have to admire.

The missing instigator call is disappointing in this writer’s opinion. Rule 46.11 of the NHL rulebook makes a good case for this example, but the rule hasn’t not been enforced regularly lately. So why is it on the books at all?

Our peers in Pittsburgh brought up the possibility that Beagle should have been penalized for wearing a visor during a fight, but skimming the rulebook (75.2.iv) tells us that call is only for instigators.

We asked our friends and readers, the really hockey-smart ones at least, to share their thoughts about the fight. Is there a warrior’s code that dictates the victor should be solemn in victory? Was Asham out of line? Was Beagle unwise to engage?

Gary L.:

from Dan Bylsma’s perspective, Asham did all the right things. The fight started because Asham felt he needed to defend Letang, which is pretty much the reason a guy like Asham is on an NHL roster. Added bonus: Pens are down a goal, and this is an opportunity to fire up the crowd and his bench. Asham wins the fight, he celebrates, firing up the crowd even more.

Beagle needs to make a better decision there and decline the fight when a guy like Asham challenges him. Also, when the instigator rule specifically notes “obvious retribution for a previous incident in the game or season” as one of the criteria for an instigator penalty, how does Asham not get an instigator here?

BJ G.:

I don’t think it was right at all. You gotta act like you’ve been there before. No one takes kindly to gloaters.

Jeff B.:

I wouldn’t go as far to say that a player should be totally solemn after winning a fight, especially in a rivalry game where he won with a strong knockout blow. No harm in a cocky smile or a look over at the bench, but I think the warrior code would say that such actions are an invitation for somebody else to step up and challenge him.

I do think that the gestures were over the top, and that a real warrior would let the punch speak for itself. It doesn’t break the warrior code, but it does indicate that the guy isn’t really much of a warrior.

Abram F.:

In itself I don’t think the fight was warranted, but Asham saw Beagle messing with Letang and it’s understandable on his part to step up. Beagle accepted, got his butt whupped, and that’s fine.

It’s not okay to taunt after knocking a guy out like that. In my mind, that doesn’t mean that a winning fighter shouldn’t be excited or demonstrative. I would have been fine if Asham had just raised his hand or interacted with the crowd or his teammates. It’s fine if you draw attention to yourself as a winner, and if it’s a fight to give your team energy, to draw attention to that. Fighting is showmanship. It’s absolutely out of line to make fun of an opponent’s injuries. Yeah, Asham skated away after dropping Beagle, but he was well aware that he did some serious damage with his last two punches, and that demands respect.

I’m not sure there is a real warrior’s code. There is one, inasmuch as people like Don Cherry, Mike Milbury, and lots of other people in the media say there is. Is there a code in the practical sense, as observed by the players? Not so sure. There’s respect and understanding, but not this whole “unwritten” code like the one that gets lionized in baseball.

Photo Gallery

(Warning: these photos are a little graphic and could be upsetting.)

Photo credit: Gregory Shamus

Photo credit: Gene J. Puskar

Photo credit: Justin K. Aller

Photo credit: Justin K. Aller

Additional reporting by Ian Oland.

Dennis Wideman celebrates his OTGWG. (Photo credit: Gregory Shamus)

For the third time in three games, the Washington Capitals required extra time to make a decision, and for the third time the Capitals proved themselves the better team. The Pittsburgh Penguins did their best to play a classy game of hockey, but then they realized they’re the Penguins and punked out. Read on and you’ll find out how.

James Neal was wide open to take a wide pass and make it 1-0 on the game’s first shot. Mike Knuble worked hard to kanoob the puck to tie it back up. Alex Ovechkin deflected a Mike Green shot that required a review to be called a goal. On a late power play, Malkin found Neal with a cross-ice pass to tie it up. Into OT and on the power play, Dennis Wideman put enough stank on the puck to evade Johnson. Caps beat Pens 3-2 (OT).

• Alex Ovechkin finally welcomed himself to a goal in this still-young season. Yeah, it was a deflection off of Mike Green and Alex was otherwise a non-entity, but whatever. We’ll take what we can get.
• Arron Asham and Jay Beagle fought. Beagle acquitted himself quite well until Asham knocked his visor into his mouth. There was blood. A lot. Arron didn’t give Beagle much of a choice. Why is the instigator rule even in the book if it’s not enforced?

• Here’s hoping Jay’s okay after that fight.
• Mike Knuble‘s 2nd period goal makes his 31st against Pittsburgh. [Insert apolitical joke about killing penguins and man-made climate change here.] It was one of his filthiest, most kanooblian tallies of all time ever in the history of man. He didn’t even need a stick.
• The Penguins defense did a stunning job suffocating an inchoate Capitals offense for most of the game. Possession was the name of the game, particularly in the first, and the Pens had it won. The Great 8, in particular, was mostly nullified by the claustrophobic coverage provided by Zbynek Michalek. Unrelated point: Z‘s should not be followed by B‘s ever. If you name your kid Zbynek, it’s sadly too late to sterilize yourself.
• The Caps got utterly mauled in scoring chances 11 to 25, 10-20 at even strength. There was only one scoring chance on the power play, the one Dennis Wideman converted. So yeah: this was a squeaker of a win if there ever were one.
• A bad night for Marcus Johansson, who wasn’t his usual self. He was on ice for 9 Pittsburgh scoring chances, five of six in the first period. Yeesh.
• There’s a PIM differential of 8 in the Caps’ direction. This surprises no one and is hardly worth a bullet, but it’s still pathetic. At least the Caps spoiled all but one Pens power play. But that last one by James Neal… grah. That burns.
• Tomas Vokoun made for an easy target after last game, but consider this: the dude took over 40 pucks tonight in front of a defense that didn’t really have his back. The first goal against was the result of poor coverage, the second the fruit of a gorgeous Malkin pass. There were 19 stopped scoring chances in the interim. So let’s all dial back on the Vokoun bile now.
• Neil points out that Jeff Halpern took three offensive draws tonight, equal to Brooks Laich and one more than Nick Backstrom. Why aren’t the scoring lines being deployed when they have a better chance to score? Is it because Jeff isn’t trusted in the defensive zone?

Okay, Alan May. This is just creepy:

That was like two hours before Ovi’s goal, so it’s time to be afraid of May’s hockeybrain.

Joe B suit of the night

Man, the Caps are not making it easy for us. These OT games are fun, but they’re also white-knuckle vasoconstricting mammajammas. Still, it’s probably good to make every game a high-pitched struggle that takes until the final tick to resolve. Like dogs slobbering before the dinner bell, maybe the Caps will respond to long hockey games by playing with leg-moving urgency throughout. Sustain that intensity for the full duration, knowwhatImean?

Who’s next? Senators? Who cares? This game was a monster, and the Caps are 3 and 0. Let’s take a day off and regroup on Saturday for hockey with some team from somewhere.

Let’s leave you with this image and remind you of a date: December 1st.

Additional reporting by Neil Greenberg, warden of the #fancystats.

UPDATE: From Dave Molinari:

Asham: Gestures after fight “uncalled for” and “kind of classless on my part.”

Everybody screws up, but it’s just the good people who apologize for it. Maybe we give Asham a mulligan on this one?