On Wednesday, Jason Chimera broke his nose in the most grotesque way possible. It looked like a boomerang. It had so much curve our readers made graphics where it helped spell the word Capitals.
On Saturday, Chimera took the ice against Tampa with two black eyes, which is the maximum number you can have. He looked like a raccoon.
Last night after Jason Chimera broke his nose in the most unsightly way possible, the Brouwer Rangers made a request to us on Twitter.
@russianmachine please 'shop this with his nose as the c in capitals
— Brouwer Rangers (@brouwerrangers) October 30, 2014
We didn’t really think that’d be the greatest idea, but @mdm1129 definitely did.
Washington Capitals forward Jason Chimera went for a big offensive zone hit on Detroit Red Wings defenseman Brendan Smith. Smith however, noticed the hard-charging Chimera coming and leaned into him with his shoulder. Chimmer fell over hard, then made his way to the bench.
When NBCSN cameras caught him with trainer Greg Smith, we were met with the most brokenest nose in the history of broken noses.
Photo credit: @recordsANDradio
One day in 7th grade, I was playing basketball at recess with some friends. After I missed a layup, one of my female friends made fun of me and I called her a not-so-nice word. She responded by tapping me on the shoulder and then kicking me in the business. The next three hours were spent in the nurse’s room, wailing and applying an ice pack to my nether regions.
On Tuesday night, Washington Capitals forward Matt Hendricks did everything I couldn’t back in middle school. His grit on full display for the 168th game in a row, Hendricks broke his nose during a second period scrum and didn’t miss a shift. Instead of yelping in the corner like a normal human, Hendricks had a superb game in which he put two shots on goal, had five blocks, and won three of four face-offs.
Spotted by the media after a practice in Tampa Wednesday, Hendricks showed off his stitches and guessed at how many times his nose had been recalibrated.
Russian Machine Never Breaks is not associated with the Washington Capitals; Monumental Sports, the NHL, or its properties. Not even a little bit.
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