If we had entitled this “Steve Downie Involved in Three-Way”, you never would have clicked on it, but that’s exactly what happened this afternoon. According to TSN’s Bob McKenzie, Tampa Bay has traded Steve Downie to the Colorado Avalanche for defenseman Kyle Quincey, and then traded Kyle Quincey to the Detroit Red Wings for a first-round draft pick and prospect Sebastien Piche.

Steve Downie has a cap hit of $1,850,000 and will bring with him his charming personality and 121 season penalty minutes, while the Detroit has acquired Quincey and his $3,125,000 cap hit, who they originally drafted in 2003, and lost on waivers in 2008.

We’re obviously very broken up about Steve Downie leaving the division and will deeply miss seeing his face six times a year. We’ll make it through this somehow. The real question is, who’s going to tell Semyon Varlamov about his new teammate?

Check out Brooksy’s face. (Photo credit: Michael Martin)

The Washington Capitals headed to the mile-high city to meet the Colorado Avalanche with hopes of a perfect road trip. NOPE.

Cody McLeod chipped the puck from the blue line; Neuvy didn’t even see it. Alex Semin scored his first goal since November 23 with a really smart wrister. Erik Johnson snapped his own goal drought just a minute later. That was the GWG. Avs beat Caps 2-1.

• The Capitals’ performance on the faceoff was– in a word– owuebfiwebwe.  Winning only 37%, the Caps struggled with possession throughout the game. Jeff Halpern, a faceoff specialist who wins 62.4%, took just 8 of 52 faceoffs (2 in the last minute). Why?
• Mathieu Perreault fell ill during the first period and didn’t return to the game.
• Just back from injury, Matt Hendricks fought his old buddy Cody McLeod. Unfortunately, McLeod pwned.

• Alex Semin‘s goal is his first since November 23, busting a slump and relieving– temporarily at least– the accusations of sandbagging that someone people (i.e.) have been leveling lately.
• What does the Caps’ power play have in common with the honey badger?  The honey badger also had just 3 shots on three power play opportunities on Saturday night. What a coincidence.
• Michal Neuvirth gave highlander Cody McLeod a really flukey goal early in the first. Neuvy didn’t even see it. That wasn’t the performance Neuvirth wanted to follow his shutout on Thursday. Nonetheless, despite some shaky looks, Mikey kept his team in the game, 26 saves on 28 shots. File under: Not His Fault.
• The altitude is not an excuse.
• Dale Hunter’s Caps haven’t beaten an American team yet.

Joe B suit of the night

What a snoozer. The Caps did not hold a lead and were tied for only about four minutes.

When the Capitals surrendered a goal just one minute after tying the game, their offense disappeared. Usually the team behind in the score increases its offense, but the Caps did the opposite. The third period saw only ONE shot on goal until the closing minutes.

Why? Is this roster stocked with emotional basket cases who cannot cope with not having the lead? Is that the fallout from a gamut of postseason heartbreaks, last year’s losing streak, and getting their coach fired? If so, how does a team come back from that?

I don’t have the answers, but I can think of better things to do on a Saturday night than watch this team huff and puff and pout and sulk.

Mike Knuble Watch: 12:06 TOI.

In 1972 Doug Johnson was sent to prison by a military court for a crime he didn’t commit. He promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, he survives as soldier of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find him, maybe you can hire the Puck Buddys.

The Puck Drop: Caps fans and booze-hounds, rejoice! We proudly announce this season’s newest, bestest, most assured to get you F’d up cocktail! The Rockin’ Red Flame Out! Directions: grab some high-priced this, pretend to add some top-shelf that, splash with vaguely European liquor, shred ice, and shake! Mix! Toss about round n’ round! Throw in a blender and oscillate! Back and forth, back and forth, up and down, over and over and over again! That’s the spirit!

Drink and regret. Clean out your blender from top to bottom (well, don’t go nuts) and repeat. Mmm…now that’s satisfaction.

Here’s the deal. I can’t believe I’m writing this yet again. For weeks I’ve been thinking about what to say about Denver – the team, the city, the doped-out state of mind. How Denver is nothing of the above: at the end of the prairie but not quite prairie, near the lip of the mountains but not in the mountains. Neither East nor West, North or South. The Hollow-Man City; the place that everyone forgets… or tries to. The cosmic rendezvous at the event horizon; the bong-water swamp where memory ends. In short, the Vortex Sutra of All That Is and Nothing That Isn’t. The confused, abandoned, cardboard bastard child of America.

And yet – hahaha we stink. Almost exactly half the time. Meaning all the mean things I said about Denver? They’re still half true, but we’ve got no room to swagger. Not despite, but precisely because of the last game.

The Naughty and Nice List, Quarta Edizione

• Naughty: Alexandr Valeryevich Semin. The Great 28. How disappointed are we; we who adore you? You don’t even get a funny comment, that’s how much. There’s nothing to laugh about anymore.
• Nice: Mike “Kanoooobs” Knuble has never disappointed, and Thursday night he again… failed to, um, not disappoint. Or something. Meaning Papa Knuble stands for everything that is awesome-sauce about the Knaps lately. Extra Xbox for the kiddies under the tree for you. But our special vánočka cookies go not to Santa but to his elf, Michal Neuvirth. Humbuggers may scoff at his stats (SV% .885) plopping him near the bottom of the NHL, but he’s shown dazzling sizzle (and other zazzley words we can’t think of right now) in moments throughout the season, and Thursday’s shut-out – though not of his own making – held moments of brilliance. Double-puppy-dog thanks to you, Neuvy.

OK, we’ve contractually gotta do this “Avs R Hawt” thing, so strap in. And to help us out, we’ve enlisted Michael “Bandito” Cox of GForce Hockey and some law skool or something out in Denver. The PuckBuddys pulled him away from his hotbox — haha, we mean finals! — long enough to offer some informed thoughts on the Avs. (ATTN prospective employers: we kid the kid – he’s straight-arrow, whip-smart, hot on his feet and has no earthly idea what a “hot box” is.)

What Makes Them Hot

1: Touche Douchene. Sure, he’s a little guy with a big ol’ -7, but Matt Duchene at 11G – 11A is second only to the comically named Ryan O’Reilly (who went to school with Paddy McShamrock) in total points, and still the Avs leading scorer. Says Cox: “He has some Crosby-esque, stylish moves up his sleeve that Caps should really watch out for, but this goal gets extra points.” So…apart from the C-word mention, he’s good. Oh, and if you’re so inclined, he’s also smokin’ hot.

Gabriel Landeskog

2: Names We Can’t Pronounce: Captain Milan Hejduk (9G, 12A, -5), the aging Czech right winger, and compatriot Gabriel Landeskog, the youthful left wing (5G, 8A, +4) are the sort of Yin/Yang to this team. Cox on Hejduk: “Their Knuble equivalent, and he’s even more of a papa because the next oldest forward is 29. Been with the Avs since ’98, he’s their captain and go-to veteran.” And on the other blondier one, simply: “He’s their Viking Warrior God.” We’ve seen pics of said deity, and we can confirm our colleague’s astute assessment.

Semyon Varlamov

 3: Space Cadet: Oh, guess what tonight is! Dinner with our Ex! Well, that’s always fun, eh? Yeah, we’re meeting up once more with Semyon Varlamov (SV .896%) near-giant Russian slab o’ puck-stoppin’ treat…and ex-Cap. And still handsome as hell. Says analyst Cox: “Some nights he’s a jedi, others he’s a space cadet.” We still miss you, Varlmonster, although we’re not missing what you didn’t do in our crease. That just sounded obscene. Anyway, you get it: Varly & Neuvy (we expect) face off. Russia v. Czech Republic. Vodka v. Pivo. Them v. Us. Sorry Varly, you’re off our Christmas card list.

What Makes Them Not

1: Is That A Stat, Or A Demographic? Oh harhar, the Avs are 14-17-1, placing them somewhere behind the Oilers and the Sun City Retirement Village Senores Y Senoritas squad. Not that that’s stopped us before from ignominious (look it up) defeat. Still, if you want to get your confidence back but you’re not quite at all confident, why not pick on the smaller kid? Oh that’s right, because it’s douchey. But may also be a path back to Caps believing in themselves again.

2: Deep Thoughts: From future 1-percenter and current forward Michael Cox: “Dale Hunter spent his final year in the NHL with the Avalanche when they went to the western conference finals, but they lost. We traded Varly to the Avs for a 1st round pick next year and a 2nd round pick in 2013 (Thanks Colorado!), Fliechman spent last year with the Avs before going to Florida, Scott Hannan (gone now) the D-man last year came from the Avs.” So…if I’m reading this right, the Avalanche is sort of the Caps dumping ground. Hmmm?  No? Well, let’s dump on them all the same.

Meme of the Night

When George McPhee traded Semyon Varlamov to Colorado in early July, not only did he gain the roster flexibility to sign Vezina-hopeful Tomas Vokoun to a discounted one-year pact, he also netted two valuable assets from the Avalanche: a first-round pick in the 2012 NHL Entry Draft and a second-round selection in either 2012 or 2013.

In a year’s time, Colorado could seriously regret this deal. Why? With two injury-prone goalies in Varlamov and Jean-Sebastien Giguere, and an offense that has few proven scorers, the Avalanche could fall into the lottery or possibly even finish dead-last in the West. That would give the Capitals a chance to pick in the top five for the first time in five years (they nabbed Karl Alzner fifth overall in 2007). It also presents McPhee and company with a shot at bringing a new Russian superstar to DC. His name: Nail Yakupov.

Let’s get you caught up. Yakupov was selected second overall by the Sarnia Sting in the 2010 Canadian Hockey League (CHL) Import Draft. Before this, he played in the Russian junior league (MHL) for his hometown team, Reaktor Nizhnekamsk. Instead of biding his time and trying his luck in the KHL with Reaktor’s parent-team, Neftekhimik Nizhnekamsk, Nail thought joining the Ontario Hockey League would be a quicker path to his dream to play in the National Hockey League.

So far, his decision looks to have paid off. Yakupov is currently ranked number one in the vast majority of prospect rankings, though it’s still too early to make any stone-cold predictions for next year. However, many analysts say that Yakupov “has it all” and will surely go number one come draft time in 2012.

In his first year with the Sting, the 17-year-old 5′ 11″ 167 lb. winger was named the OHL’s Rookie of the Month three times. He also broke records previously set by current NHL superstar Steven Stamkos. At the same age, Stamkos posted 42 goals and 92 points. Nail finished his season with 49 goals and 101 points, winning both the OHL and CHL’s Rookie of the Year awards.

For those of you who have never seen him play, here’s a video — with glorious techno music of course — of Yakupov dominating in the OHL:

Wow. After watching this, it’s hard to disagree with the praise Nail’s earned from HockeyProspect:

Maybe the easiest way to compare Nail Yakupov is a smaller version of Alexander Ovechkin. Although it is extremely unlikely for Nail to reach Alexander’s 6’3” 225lb size, he plays a very similar game and has a great number of similar traits.

Travis Yost, HockeyBuzz’s Senators and OHL blogger, agrees:

With as much strength as there is at the top of the draft, the Washington Capitals have to be absolutely salivating. In a best case scenario, imagine that the Avalanche completely tank, and the Capitals go and grab the venerable Nail Yakupov from the Sarnia Sting.

By all accounts, Yakupov is already NHL ready and could hit the National Hockey League as a blue-chip. You know, the ‘can’t-miss’ prospect that’s sure to dominate the league for years and years to come.

A player of his talent could single-handedly marginalize the probable loss of Alexander Semin, who should be in another hockey city come 2012. And, you’d have to imagine Yakupov would love playing alongside one of his country’s most respected and heralded players in Alexander Ovechkin.

Despite his limited size and Russian hockey education, Yakupov is not a complete liability on defense. He also can play both wings — just like fellow Russian Evgeny Kuznetsov. He’s also not afraid to mix it up.

Or check someone through the glass.

So, Caps fans, let’s hope for an awful season from the Avs this year. I truly believe Nail Yakupov is a superstar in the making, a perfect player to compliment Ovechkin and eventually replace an expensive — and possibly declining — Alex Semin on the second line. And really, it’s nothing personal, Colorado. You’ve won your championships. You have your banners. Now it’s time for the Caps to have some good luck!

Additional reporting by Ian Oland.

All photos by Sweetest Hockey On Earth’s Kyle M.

On July 1st — the first day of Free Agency — the Capitals dealt 23-year-old Semyon Varlamov to the Colorado Avalanche for a first-round pick in the 2012 Entry Draft and a second-round selection in either 2012 or 2013. After weeks of speculation that pointed to Varly not returning to Washington and even potentially landing in the KHL, the Avalanche submitted an offer that General Manager George McPhee couldn’t refuse.

“We were hoping to have Semyon back this year and play a full season so we could get that kind of value for him next summer because we knew next summer we were going to have to do something with one of the goaltenders,” McPhee told The Washington Post the day of the deal. “But we got that value now, and given the injury, I’m surprised we got that now.”

Varlamov immediately signed a three-year, $8.5 million contract with the Avs, who will give the young Russian every opportunity possible to be their starter. “Of course, every goalie wants to be No. 1,” Varlamov said when he was introduced to the Colorado media. “Injuries, everything is behind me. I see my future in Colorado right now.”

Meanwhile, the former Cap has good reason to be confident going into next season. Forty or so miles north of the Mason-Dixon line, Varly has been working with nationally-renown physical trainer Steve Saunders in Lancaster, Pennsylvania. Saunders’ Power Train Sports Institute has worked with some of the most well-known athletes in this area including the NFL’s Hines Ward, Todd Heap, and James Harrison.  He has also trained former Hershey Bear Grant McNeil and Philadelphia Phillies’ ageless-wonder Raul Ibanez.

Varly has been plagued by a variety of injuries during his NHL career, suffering multiple groin pulls over the past two seasons. Saunders has been working with him on strengthening certain muscles around his groin to avoid the injuries recurring in the future.

“[Varlamov is] a very explosive guy,” Saunders explained to ABC27′s Gregg Mace in an exclusive interview. “The way he changes directions, as explosively and as fast as he does, we need to make sure those muscles are strong. And not only those muscles, but the muscles around it. That’s really where he’s had the problem. It’s really not his groin that’s weak. It’s very strong. It’s the muscles on the opposite side of that, that need work because he overuses his groin so much.”

Mace interviewed both Varly and Saunders at Power Train in Lancaster on Friday.  The entire interview and photos of the training session can be seen below. Gregg’s full feature will be aired on ABC27 News in Harrisburg on Monday night at 6 and 11 PM. Make sure to check it out.

Interviews

Additional Photos

No goal. (Photo credit: Mitchell Layton)

Matt Bradley drops the gloves with Cody McLeod. (Photo credit: Jacquelyn Martin)

EVEN LATER UPDATE 12/12 1PM: Per Bob McKenzie, Alex Semin has been fined for his crosscheck on COL’s John-Michael Liles, and will play tonight against NYR.

UPDATE 12/11 11:50PM: Dmitry Chesnokov heard that Alex Semin will not be suspended.

Let’s get the hell out of town. The Washington Capitals have lost five games in a row, four of them at home base. The Colorado Avalanche brought their fast-paced offense to town as Washington tried to re-awake theirs. Despite showing more effort than in recent games, the Caps failed to stop, drop, shut em’ down, open up shop.

Kevin Shattenkirk got lucky with an early goal that Michal Neuvirth should have stopped. Mike Knuble responded with his 250th career goal, a typical Knuble score from inches out. Tom Poi was woefully out of position, allowing Ryan Wilson to waltz in and score the go-ahead goal. Piling on was Paul Stasny, who converted on the powerplay. Matt Hendricks launched a comeback with a no-looker from the crease, but the home team ran out of time. Avs beat Caps 3-2.

• The Capitals led in scoring chances 25 to 13. Is this whole slump due to bad luck?
• Alex Semin lost his temper. Sasha Minor retaliated for a crosscheck by dangerously crosschecking John-Michael Liles in the back of the head. Semin earned his 5-minute major and his game misconduct. We expect to see a suspension from Colin Campbell, which would also be earned. Though, then again, extra punishment from the league is always unpredictable.

• Former Av Matt Hendricks was your player of the game. He was on ice for 8 5v5 chances for and zero against. He scored the best-looking goal of the night, and he delivered some mondo hits. Maybe he was playing hard to show up his former teammates, those ungrateful bastards. Or maybe he really is this versatile of a player.
• Hey, Tomas Fleischmann. Good to see ya, pal. How ya been? Cool. Hey, you know you contributed absolutely nothing to this game, right? The Capitals were literally ignoring you in those post-whistle scrums.
• Big ups to Mike Knuble for recording his 250th career goal. And how appropriate for that 250th to be a nasty deflection from point blank.
• Eric Fehr has been on ice for one goal for in the last twelve games. Benching is imminent.
• Alex Ovechkin played all but 18 seconds of the Capitals 5:30 ice time. In that time, the Capitals had only one scoring chance. The powerplay is still disappointing.
• Shattenkirk. No note. Just a funny name.

Joe B's suit of the night > Alan May's

That the Capitals are enthused about the game is baffling. Post-game interviews, particularly the ones with Bruce Boudreau and Mike Knuble, were pretty mellow. Well yes, the offense played better at even strength, but the power play has been struggling for far too long. Unless we can consider Matt Hendricks our new man-advantage scoring agent, this team still has a serious problem. You can’t say that this team has hit rock bottom until they start heading in the other direction. And to me, that means a win.

See you tomorrow night at MSG. Maybe the change of venue will do some good.

Additional reporting by Neil Greenberg

Either the rumors were true, or even a blind squirrel bumps into a nut sometimes. In the end, Tomas Fleischmann is now a mile high, traded to the Colorado Avalanche for blueliner Scott Hannan.

If we look at the trade from Flash’s point of view, it’s a great move. He goes to a team that wants him, most likely to fill a Top 6 spot left vacant when leading scorer Chris Stewart broke his hand in a fight with Minnesota’s Kyle Brodziak. Sometimes a change of scenery is just what a player needs to get back on track. RMNB wishes him the very best.

The move makes sense for the Capitals for a variety of reasons:

1. The price for shutdown defensemen only goes up the closer you get to the trade deadline. We learned this past summer that “shutdown” defensemen are in hot demand like iPads in the holiday season. When you are stacked with blue chippers on the blueline and in goal, it makes sense that other teams would hold your feet to the fire.

2. Chemistry developed earlier is better than chemistry developed later. Hannan has a jump start on this already, having played in the AHL and NHL with Matt Bradley and with Hendricks on Colorado last year. Coach Boudreau has the time he needs to find Hannan the right partner, whether that’s part of the top pair with Mike Green or bottom pair with Poti or Erskine.

3. Clear upgrade on the blueline. Sloan, while good as a fill in, is not dependable enough to get a sweater every night. Plus, this move gets the Caps another step closer to a sustained playoff run, and that’s where Hannan shined last year. Hannan, along with Kyle Quincey, spent 85% of their even strength time against the Sharks’ top two lines, and posted the best chances differential among all Colorado defenders.

4. Everything else remains intact. The Caps keep their draft picks, prospects and players essential to their long term plans (Carlzner, Neuvirth, etc.) without compromising future cap space. Fleischmann, while considered a top six forward by some, just wasn’t. At least not yet. Besides, his linemates do better away from him than they did with him.

5. Maybe Mathieu Perreault gets a shot. To me, the move signifies that Marcus Johannson is going to be given every opportunity to solidify himself in the second center spot. That leaves the third pivot open for Mathieu Perreault, who currently has 8 goals and 16 assists in 16 games played for the Hershey Bears. If we translate that to the NHL level, he would project to have roughly 4 goals and 8 assists in 16 NHL games – an upgrade over Flash’s 10 points in 23 games.

It may have taken months, but it looks like the Caps got the better end of this deal. George McPhee is certainly excited. Leave your thoughts on the trade in the comments below.