Photo credit: Chris Gordon

You watched games one and two. You know New York Rangers fans taunted Alex Ovechkin. You know Ovi had some trouble hearing them after scoring the game-winning goal on Monday.

Here’s how it works: The Madison Square Garden crowd counts down to the 8-minute mark of each period and then chants “Ovi Sucks!” Here’s it in action:

As Ana explained earlier, the chant is a bastardization of what Ottawa Senator fans do at the 11-minute mark to celebrate their captain, Daniel Alfredsson. So it’s like an homage, except mean-spirited and awful. Good news is that Caps superfan Sam “Horn Guy” Wolk plans to redeem the tradition with a remix of the remix. Please consider the following for Game Three tonight.

At 8:08 of each period, start counting down the seconds 8 – 7 – 6 – 5, etc.  until the 8:00 mark.

Then you will chant  ”O-V!” eight times.

It’s quick. It’s easy. And it shows solidarity for Ovi (even if he doesn’t need it).

But really, it’s how we’ll remind Rangers fans that we still do their own cheers better than they do.

Sam tells me the horn will not be involved, and everyone’s screams need to be in unison. To make that happen, you’re gonna have to tell your friends, family, and everyone that you know who’s going to the game about this post and prepare them. Spread the word.

Make us hear you.

Not Alex Ovechkin. (Pic via capitals.com)

For those of you who like the All-Star Game, good news: this game was just as loose and ridiculous as you could have possibly dreamed. For those of you who dislike the All-Star Game, good news: it’s over.

We return to real hockey on Tuesday and thank goodness for that, but it was a nice weekend of rest for most of our team, and a nice weekend of dumb, mindless spectacle for hockey fans. I expect to see the rest of the Caps come back with suntans, and Dennis Wideman to come back with a smile on his face. As silly as most of the actual events of the weekend are, recognition is and always will be one of the best feelings in the world, especially for a guy like Wideman that rarely gets what he deserves.

It’s still official Dennis Wideman Day for the rest of Sunday, and then after that you can go back to your regularly scheduled Caps fandom.

Best Moments

• Remember that time that Henrik Lundqvist said that Marian Gaborik couldn’t score on him? Gaborik should have made him bet on it. He had two goals against his teammate, and on the first one he went down into Artem Anisimov’s “shotgun” goal celebration. Luckily John Tortorella appeared to think this was very funny. Either that, or that was his crazy laugh.
• Dennis Wideman was paired with Dion Phaneuf today…in a game where players don’t hit, which basically negates any value that being paired with Dion Phaneuf could have had. Sorry, Dennis.
• A good moment to ask Alfredsson for an in-depth retrospective on his career is definitely when he is on the ice in the middle of a hockey game.
• Due to overwhelming demand, Drake performed at intermission. We were in tears. He is truly this generation’s Shakespeare.
• Tim Peel was a referee for the game, and had to be told several times to stop trying to call diving on Alex Semin.
• Gaborik scored three goals for a hat trick, but no hats were forthcoming. One guy tried to throw a hat on the ice–a referee threw it back. Buzzkill.
• Hartnell after he scored: “Woo! The Sedin triplets!”
• The Kessel-Lupul line scored twice. The Ottawa crowd was quick to celebrate their careers and accomplishments in a game that crosses all team lines. Also tonight in almost-irony: Tyler Seguin was the other player on their line.
• Hometown hero Daniel Alfredsson scored twice in the second period, and the crowd tried to blow the speakers out with the “Alfie” chants. Great moment.
• Scott Hartnell kept tempting us with baby checks–the broadcast team classified them as “bumps”. We just want somebody to flat-out check somebody else. Just one time. Ryan Suter on this: “Someone’s going to have to settle him down. He’s running around there hitting guys.” The horror!
• Steven Stamkos stopped a puck with his stick from the bench so that Dan Girardi didn’t have to chase it down for icing. That’s so illeg–ahhhh, it’s the All-Star Game.
• Awkward Kessel of the night. “Phil, you look good out there, your legs look like they’re moving better than last night!” “Oh, I don’t know about that. I feel awful.”
• The broadcast team recklessly encouraged Claude Giroux to trip Scott Hartnell, who not only immediately took their suggestion but also tried to get other players in on it as well. #pushHartnelldown

Priceisms

Pic: Fred Chartrand

• “Carey, did you get a piece of that?” “Nope. I’ll say I did though.”
• To the ref, when he covered the puck: “Don’t blow that whistle, I want this thing to run out here!”
• On his goalposts stopping pucks: “These guys are awesome tonight. They’ve been excellent all year.” “Did you kiss your posts like Patrick Roy?” “No but I gave them a pretty good love tap here. They were awesome in that sequence.”
• On his teammates: “These guys are playing hard for me right now! I might have to buy them a dinner afterward!” This is apparently very new for Carey Price.
• “Oh, here we go,” I have deciphered, is Price-speak for “please shut up real quick, people are trying to score on me.”

Results

• Winner: Team Chara, 12-9. I can see why the NHL wants higher-scoring games. This was so thrilling and suspenseful.
• Goal Scorers: Gaborik (3), Malkin, Spezza, H. Sedin, Tavares, Lupul (2), Pominville, Alfredsson (2), Kane, Kessel, Iginla, Giroux, Hossa, Chara, Perry, D. Sedin.
• Game MVP: Marian Gaborik
• Wideman ended the night with 20:27 of ice time, a -2, and one assist.
• If you are looking for an extensive gallery of artistic crotch shots, Getty Images has got you covered. This is what the spirit of the All-Star Game is really all about.

And we’ll leave you with this. (Pic: Gregory Shamus)

Screengrab via @CarrottBazooka

Since Alex Ovechkin has opted out of the All-Star Weekend (and has better things to do anyway), Dennis Wideman is now Washington’s lone representative in Ottawa. While Wideman is perhaps slightly less likely to don a hat and sunglasses and do trick shots, he’s a Capital, so we love him all the same. We’ll be covering Wideman’s foray into the glamorous life of an All-Star, so check back for updates, because let’s face it, you’re already bored without hockey.

Dennis Wideman was picked in the 15th round with the second-to-last pick that could be used on a defenseman, before only Canucks defenseman Alexander Edler. This means that we can get hipster now if we want and call him underrated. We knew Dennis Wideman when he wasn’t cool. Logan Couture was picked last overall and won a brand new caaaaarrrrr! Somehow it just wasn’t the same without Ovechkin there laughing and taking pictures.

Best Moments

• Pavel Datsyuk went first overall to Team Chara. Erik Karlsson got picked first for Team Alfredsson because he babysits Alfie’s kids, apparently.
• Alfie got confused about what round it was multiple times, leading to excellent cutaways of him asking everyone around him.
• Do the Leafs suck? I feel unsure. I wish that someone would have clarified this.

• Carey Price, clearly not expecting to be picked by a Bruin and a Leaf, had a mouthful of water when he was picked by Team Chara, and spent a good thirty seconds remembering how to swallow. It wasn’t an actual spit-take, but it was close.
• James Duthie somehow talked to Tim Thomas about the White House scandal without ever once actually mentioning what happened. Because, you know, he wouldn’t want to distract from the event at hand.

Best Quotes

• Joffrey Lupul on being booed every time he took the podium: “I like it. I don’t want to be cheered in Ottawa anyway.”
• Jason Spezza: “I owe Malkin 20 bucks. I told him he’d get picked before me.”
• Carey Price: “Is Z going for offense or defense? Wait remember, there’s no defense.”
• Tonight in unintentional rhymes: “Our third pick…Jonathan Quick.”
• Jarome Iginla to Patrick Kane: “Hey, what’s up man?” Kane: “Yeah, you too.”

via penslove.tumblr.com

• Chara to Tyler Seguin after making him wait till the second-to-last round: “Hug it out?”
• Cody Hodgson on ending up on Team Chara “It wasn’t my choice.” Pained face.
• Jason Spezza and Erik Karlsson discussing Sedin mythology: “I wonder if him and his brother will have any chemistry in the game?” “Doubtful.” “Aliens.” “They know where to pass the puck without even talking. It’s insane.”
• Alfredsson on Marion Gaborik being picked by Team Chara: “We were hoping Gaborik would be left, but Hank said you can’t score on him anyway.”

Important Questions

• Do they know who each team is going to draft beforehand, or do they just have two of each sweater for everyone?
• Who is most desperately in need of a haircut: Letang, Stamkos, or Hartnell? Discuss.
• What do you call a person who lives in Ottawa? Is it Ottawan? Ottawaian? Ottauan?

Photo credit: paparazzi.ru

This week, the Caps went 3-1-0 against the Lightning, Hurricanes, Islanders, and Habs, and if you asked someone who they thought was the only team to beat us, they would probably be surprised by the answer. Despite being outshot 77-136, the Caps still managed to outscore opponents 9-7 and take 6 of 8 points. Especially if you blindly ignore that Tuesday ever happened, it was a pretty good week.

Elsewhere in the NHL, a compelling case was made for wearing helmets in warmups, Mrs. Pronger made us sad about Chris Pronger again, Brian Elliott was re-signed in St. Louis, Chara and Alfredsson were named captains of the All-Star Game, Rangers owner James Dolan apparently has no idea the Stanley Cup is not awarded in January, and Ryan Kesler and Alain Vigneault had a lovers’ quarrel.

In case you were wondering the most important question–how does everything in the world apply to the Washington Capitals?–here’s a helpful guide to what’s terrible this week.

Best of the week

• Dmitry Orlov has a pretty hard shot.
• This graphic will be helpful for tonight!
• Terrifying enforcer Karl Alzner fought Steve Downie.
• Alex Ovechkin, rap star.
• Dmitry Orlov’s face after scoring his first NHL goal.
• If you haven’t watched the Rene Bourque Punch-Out Video, watch the Rene Bourque Punch-Out video.

Follow Ana on twitter, or on her blog, you know, if you feel like it, or get really bored.

Photo credit: Fred Chartrand

Alex Ovechkin’s had a tough year. He’s failed to find consistency in his game. He’s been benched, seen the coach that benched him get fired, and trails Jason Chimera in goals. He’s been criticized by almost every big-time NHL columnist in the country. Even future Hall of Famer Teemu Selanne has been asked what’s wrong with Ovechkin.

Tonight, however, we saw the first real flash of the old Ovi. You know– that creative, “you will not effing stop me from scoring even if you set up a brick wall in front of the goal and tie both hands behind my back” Ovechkin. In the third period against the Senators, with the game tied 2-2, the Caps started a breakout from behind their own net. And then Ovi decided he felt like scoring.

Let’s review.

After curling behind the net to build some speed, Ovi takes a drop pass from Nicklas Backstrom.

He goes for a skate.

Oh hey, Daniel Alfredsson!

See ya, Daniel Alfredsson!

Oh hey, Erik Karlsson! (NO RELATION TO JOHN CARLSON!)

The wraparound doesn’t look like an option…

Let’s try…

A DOUBLE SKATE STOP AT 30 MPH!

Snow!

Bye bye!

Okay, time to blast it past Craig Anderson.

I’ma serious.

Just kidding!)))))) Let’s do snap shot instead!

Kiss glove.

LKDS&$&#%$#EO#@!!!!

best!!!!!!

Video: http://youtu.be/Gw-m1n–W-E