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	<title>Russian Machine Never Breaks &#187; Dogs</title>
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	<link>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com</link>
	<description>A cheerfully demented Washington Capitals site with a healthy fixation on Alex Ovechkin and his Russian bros. CRASH THE NET!</description>
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		<title>Karl Alzner&#8217;s Dog Ends His Personal Lockout</title>
		<link>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2012/10/17/karl-alzners-dog-ends-his-personal-lockout/</link>
		<comments>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2012/10/17/karl-alzners-dog-ends-his-personal-lockout/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 17 Oct 2012 15:26:04 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ian Oland</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Photos]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dogs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Karl Alzner]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/?p=39829</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[With the lockout a little over a month old, Karl Alzner&#8216;s dog Murphy decided to show the type of free-thinking and ingenuity that will be needed to end the NHL&#8217;s labor dispute. Presumably using his paws, Murphy jimmied the crate door open (again) and left his calling card on the carpet. The reign of terror [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/karl-alzner-dog-escapes.jpeg"><img class="alignnone size-large wp-image-39830" style="border: solid 1px #000;" title="karl-alzner-dog-escapes" src="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/karl-alzner-dog-escapes-607x809.jpeg" alt="" width="607" height="809" /></a></p>
<p>With the lockout a little over a month old, <strong>Karl Alzner</strong>&#8216;s dog Murphy decided to show the type of free-thinking and ingenuity that will be needed to end the NHL&#8217;s labor dispute. Presumably using his paws, Murphy jimmied the crate door open (<a href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2012/05/29/karl-alzners-dogs-can-escape-crates/" target="_blank">again</a>) and left his calling card on the carpet.</p>
<p>The <a href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2012/05/04/karl-alzner-explains-why-his-dogs-trashed-his-home/" target="_blank">reign of terror in the Alzner household</a> continues.</p>
<p><em>Photo via @<a href="https://twitter.com/karlalzner/status/258418571829456896/photo/1/large" target="_blank">KarlAlzner</a></em></p>
 
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Karl Alzner&#8217;s Dogs Can Escape Crates</title>
		<link>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2012/05/29/karl-alzners-dogs-can-escape-crates/</link>
		<comments>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2012/05/29/karl-alzners-dogs-can-escape-crates/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 29 May 2012 16:41:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ana Hansen</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Video]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dogs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Karl Alzner]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/?p=35518</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Despite his strong play throughout the season, Karl Alzner might be more famous lately for his dogs&#8217; bad behavior. A month ago, as Alzner and his fiancee Mandy left for Game Three against the Rangers, they decided to leave their dogs out of their crate for the night. Of course, that was the night that [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><img src="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/dogs-607x398.jpg" alt="" title="dogs" width="607" height="398" style="border: solid 1px #000" class="alignnone size-large wp-image-35555" /></p>
<p>Despite his strong play throughout the season, <strong>Karl Alzner</strong> might be more famous lately <a href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2012/05/04/karl-alzner-explains-why-his-dogs-trashed-his-home/" target="_blank">for his dogs&#8217; bad behavior</a>.</p>
<p>A month ago, as Alzner and his fiancee Mandy left for Game Three against the Rangers, they decided to leave their dogs out of their crate for the night. Of course, that was the night that the game went into triple overtime, and when the two returned at 2 AM, their dogs Charlie, Murphy, and Duncan <a href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2012/05/04/karl-alzner-explains-why-his-dogs-trashed-his-home/" target="_blank">had trashed their home</a>.</p>
<p><span id="more-35518"></span></p>
<p>Well, apparently crating the dogs doesn&#8217;t work either. Over the weekend, Alzner <a href="https://twitter.com/karlalzner/status/206885090825998336" target="_blank">tweeted video</a> that his family took of the dogs escaping while they were out of the house, and the results lead us to believe that these dogs might <a href="http://gingerbare.tumblr.com/post/23974485699/mike-green-on-a-segway-the-full-sequence" target="_blank">actually be smarter than some Caps players. </a></p>
<p><iframe src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/jJHFGirDnJA" frameborder="0" width="607" height="341"></iframe></p>
<p><em>For the dog pun version of this story, visit <a href="http://www.nbcwashington.com/blogs/capital-games/Karl-Alzners-Dogs-Incredibly-Resourceful--154919345.html" target="_blank">NBC Washington</a>.</em></p>
 
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		</item>
		<item>
		<title>Karl Alzner Explains Why His Dogs Trashed His Home</title>
		<link>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2012/05/04/karl-alzner-explains-why-his-dogs-trashed-his-home/</link>
		<comments>http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/2012/05/04/karl-alzner-explains-why-his-dogs-trashed-his-home/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 05 May 2012 03:03:27 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Ian Oland</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Playoffs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Transcription]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Dogs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Karl Alzner]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[NHL Players and Nature]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/?p=34064</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Early Thursday morning, a disappointed and exhausted Karl Alzner returned home with his fiancé Mandy. Alzner, who was on the ice when the Rangers&#8217; Marian Gaborik ended Game Three in triple overtime, had just participated in the longest NHL game since 2008 and the third longest game in Washington Capitals history. Unfortunately for Karl, the [...]]]></description>
				<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/karl-alzner-with-dogs.jpg"><img src="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/karl-alzner-with-dogs.jpg" alt="" title="karl-alzner-with-dogs" width="607" style="border: solid 1px #000" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-34070" /></a></p>
<p>Early Thursday morning, a disappointed and exhausted <strong>Karl Alzner</strong> returned home with his fiancé Mandy.  Alzner, who was on the ice when the Rangers&#8217; Marian Gaborik ended Game Three in triple overtime, had just participated in the longest NHL game since 2008 and the third longest game in Washington Capitals history.</p>
<p>Unfortunately for Karl, the deflating loss was just the beginning of his problems.  <a href="https://twitter.com/#!/karlalzner/status/197927867512918016" target="_blank">In a tweet at 2 AM</a>, Alzner published a photo with the caption <em>Dogs not happy about the loss either</em>. In the picture, Alzner&#8217;s dogs can be seen posing &#8212; proudly &#8212; in front of his trashed living room.  </p>
<p><span id="more-34064"></span></p>
<p><a href="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/karl-alzner-dogs.jpg"><img src="http://www.russianmachineneverbreaks.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/karl-alzner-dogs.jpg" alt="" title="karl-alzner-dogs" width="607" style="border: solid 1px #000" class="alignnone size-full wp-image-34068" /></a></p>
<p><em>D&#8217;awwwwww.</em></p>
<p>Since then the photo has gone viral, showing up on <a href="http://sports.yahoo.com/blogs/nhl-puck-daddy/capitals-defenceman-karl-alzner-dogs-had-way-more-214529458.html" target="_blank">multiple</a> <a href="http://now.msn.com/now-plus/0503-alzner-dog-tweet.aspx" target="_blank">national websites</a>. On Friday, NHL Live hosts EJ Hradek and Deb Placey asked Karl to tell the story behind the picture.</p>
<p>&#8220;In the picture on the left is Duncan and on the right is Charlie,&#8221; Alzner began. &#8220;Another culprit is Murphy, who me and Mandy assume is the ringleader. He was hiding at the time.&#8221;</p>
<p>&#8220;I was excited to be home and see the dogs,&#8221; Alzner, who estimated that he got 2,500 more twitter followers due to the photo, explained. &#8220;Usually we have them in a crate, but Mandy was leaving early to go to the game and we knew that they&#8217;d be in [the crates] for a while.&#8221;</p>
<p>That&#8217;s when the 23-year-old Capitals defenseman felt sorry for his pets and decided to let them be free and roam the house for the night. </p>
<p>&#8220;We thought maybe we&#8217;ll give them a chance,&#8221; he said. &#8220;Everything should be fine. Then we came in and they greeted us at the door. We took them outside to go to the bathroom and then we walked up the stairs and sure enough, there was their mess.&#8221;</p>
<p>Alzner was shocked by the destruction. It was obviously the last thing he wanted to see that night after such a tough loss. </p>
<p>Lesson learned, right? From now on, the Caps just need to end all their games in regulation so that his dogs won&#8217;t run wild.  Alzner disagreed: &#8220;I have a feeling they got to work on that right away.&#8221;</p>
<h2 class="ihatepeter">Video</h2>
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