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GIF by welshhockeyfan
What did I say yesterday? Do not smite the hockey gods lest you shall pay. In game one of the Stanley Cup Finals, Jaromir Jagr hit the post in second overtime and then collided with teammate and part-time bouncer, Milan Lucic. Shades of this, amirite?
Next for Jagr: locusts!
The play happens at the 38-second mark.
During Friday’s series-sweeping Boston win over the Pittsburgh Penguins, Brad Marchand did his thing. But I’m not here to chronicle another Louganisian dive or a infuriating cheap shot, instead I want to take a look at what happened when he tried to steal Sidney Crosby‘s stick during a line-change.
As Crosby dumps the puck into the Bruins zone, Marchand, loading up to make a big hit, instead softly shoves the Penguins captain in the left shoulder. Crosby skates away, but Marchand isn’t finished chatting. He grabs Crosby’s stick and refuses to let go.
Marchand is a toddler, sure, but the interesting part is Pierre McGuire and his reaction. Pierre, with a look of concern, raises his right hand twice and then, after flinching backwards from the players, lunges forward, and smiles. It’s creepy.
Laaaaadies. (Screenshot via reader Paddy P.)
Last week, Alex Ovechkin and companion walking boot made the trek to Paris to cheer for his fiancee Maria Kirilenko (and BAY) at the French Open. Maria had a successful tournament, advancing to the quarterfinals of the Open for the first time beforing losing to Viktoria Azarenka of Belarus, a part-time lion tamer and also the third ranked women’s player in the world.
Not winning the shiny Roland Garros trophy isn’t the end of the world. As of next week, Maria will break into the WTA’s top-10 rankings for the first time in her career. The highest she’s ever been ranked previously was 12th. Do we credit Ovechkin’s cheering? We credit Ovechkin’s cheering.
Now let’s summarize what you missed.
The Pittsburgh Penguins entered the 2013 playoffs as the best team in the East. Hands down. They led the league in goals despite losing ever-vainglorious Sidney Crosby to plastic surgery mid-season. It seemed like a trip to the Stanley Cup Finals would be a cakewalk, even moreso once The Kid returned.
And then.
Marc-Andre Fleury’s first round cognitive flatulence from last year made an (un?)expected return. He was benched after four fecal games against the Islanders. Opting instead for Tomas “I have a really surprising amount of tattoos” Vokoun, the Pens’ rickety ship got rightened long enough to beat the Islanders and the Senators.
But now, against the Bruins in the Eastern Conference Finals, hockey’s golden goose Sidney Crosby has been diagnosed with a virulent case of the Fleuries. Crosby had a bevy of boondoggles in game one, which I’ll document below, including a Sean Avery-esque shove of Tuukka Rask at the end of the second period that in a just world would have resulted in a They Live-style brawl. Then, in game two, on his first shift, Crosby served up a tasty turnover that led to Boston’s first goal. That set the tone for the game, which was the most deliciously pathetic thing we’ve had the privilege to watch in a long time. The Bruins lead the series 2-0, and the Pens — well, they’re in trouble, dude.
Listen. I’ve been taunted by Penguins fans all my life. This is overdue.
Mathieu Perreault‘s celebrations after Capitals’ overtime wins were the best part of the season. We gave them the name #PerryCelly and designed a t-shirt in its honor, but it seems Caps fans still can’t get enough of the enthusiastic gyrations Now, dougiegilmour has shared this GIF to Tumblr. Just stunning. Here, Perreault and Jay Beagle partner up to bake a cake. Real teamwork.
I think I still love the guitar windmill version more, but man, so great.
If you see other #PerryCelly remixes out there, post them in the comments below. They need a home.
Photo credit: Bruce Bennett
I appreciate the gesture, but I’d really rather not have my team’s $10-million superstar throwing his body in front of ballistic vulcanized rubber. – RMNB game 6 recap
Washington’s one surviving newspaper beat writer, Katie Carrera, dropped this bomb on Thursday afternoon:
Alex Ovechkin played the final two games of the Capitals’ first-round series against New York with a hairline fracture in his left foot, according to a league source with direct knowledge of the winger’s injury.
Ovechkin reportedly sustained the injury blocking shots during the first period of game six. We wrote about it at the time.
Photo credit: championat.com
Alex Ovechkin flew for approximately ten hours to Helsinki with the intention of helping the Russian national team win the 2013 World Championships. Jet-lagged, he did what he could, scoring a goal and recording an assist against the United States during their quarterfinals game on Thursday. That help was not nearly enough, as the defending champions suffered their worst defeat ever in a World Championship game, a 8-3 loss to the United States. After half a year in the KHL, a shortened NHL season, a too-short playoff run, and a single game at Worlds, Ovechkin’s season is now officially over.
Ovechkin, who spoke to Sovetsky Sport’s Pavel Lysenkov after the game and had his words later translated by Puck Daddy’s Dmitry Chesnokov, was disappointed.
Hit play before watching the GIFs.
It’s game seven. It’s do or die. Washington Capitals captain Alex Ovechkin isn’t going to stand idly by as his team’s season hangs in the balance.
With 11:38 left in the first period, Ovechkin stepped out on the ice for a shift, and it was inspiring. Ovechkin laid out three New York Rangers players with big hits and left the ice to a roaring standing ovation from the sold out Verizon Center crowd.
Let’s recap.
Skating in just the second NHL game of his career, Tom Wilson immediately saw his role on the team expanded. Wilson got a lot more ice time and more of the same with: big hits and strong skating.
For the most part, at least. Wilson lost a skate blade after a collision with Ryan McDonagh and had to hobble his hulking frame back to the bench like a goofball.
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