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What could have been. Sigh.

Washington Capitals General Manager George McPhee has yet to finalize the 2013-14 on-ice roster, but at least one of the organization’s off-ice squads is now set. Following two days of tryouts and interviews held at the Verizon Center over the weekend, the Caps introduced fans to the latest iteration of the cheerleading and community relations team known as the Red Rockers. But two rather visible Caps fans were turned away from the auditions.

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Monday night, Brendan Shanahan suspended Alex Ovechkin three games for his hit on Penguins defenseman Zbynek Michalek. Tuesday morning, George McPhee announced that Ovi would be pulling out of the All-Star Game and its festivities in Ottawa. “Because he’s a suspended player, he doesn’t feel like he deserves to be there, so he’s not going to go,” McPhee told the gathered media. “He doesn’t want to be a distraction to the event.”

Fair enough. Yet Ovi’s decision to skip All-Star weekend has been met with criticism from some and anger by others. St. Louis Blues winger Andy McDonald tweeted a “a classless move by Ovi ‘opting’ out of the NHL Allstar Game.” What they don’t seem to realize is that Ovechkin has lots of other important things to be doing with his time. First things first, shaving-cream pie Mathieu Perreault.

It’ll be twelve days between when Ovechkin was suspended and when we next see him on the ice, so in the meantime, here are a few things we think he might be up to.

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