Enjoy the video and follow me past the jump:

Top 10 Goals

10. Jamie Benn @ Columbus
9.  Eric Nystrom @ Washington (Neuvirth)
8. Bobby Ryan vs. NYI
7. Jiri Tlusty vs. Washington (Vokoun)
6. John Tavares vs. Calgary
5. Pavel Datsyuk @ Boston
4. Jason Spezza @ Pittsburgh
3. Nick Foligno vs. Washington (Vokoun)
2. Evgeni Malkin vs. Colorado
1. Matt Duchene @ Pittsburgh

That’s three appearances out of ten– two from Vokoun and one from Neuvirth. The Foligno one still makes me angry.

And if you include Semyon Varlamov and Brent Johnson, then HALF of the stupid list comes from goalies from the Washington system.

Thanks to random caps fan for the link.

In 1972 Doug Johnson was sent to prison by a military court for a crime he didn’t commit. He promptly escaped from a maximum security stockade to the Los Angeles underground. Today, still wanted by the government, he survives as soldier of fortune. If you have a problem, if no one else can help, and if you can find him, maybe you can hire the Puck Buddys.

The Puck Drop: Caps fans and booze-hounds, rejoice! We proudly announce this season’s newest, bestest, most assured to get you F’d up cocktail! The Rockin’ Red Flame Out! Directions: grab some high-priced this, pretend to add some top-shelf that, splash with vaguely European liquor, shred ice, and shake! Mix! Toss about round n’ round! Throw in a blender and oscillate! Back and forth, back and forth, up and down, over and over and over again! That’s the spirit!

Drink and regret. Clean out your blender from top to bottom (well, don’t go nuts) and repeat. Mmm…now that’s satisfaction.

Here’s the deal. I can’t believe I’m writing this yet again. For weeks I’ve been thinking about what to say about Denver – the team, the city, the doped-out state of mind. How Denver is nothing of the above: at the end of the prairie but not quite prairie, near the lip of the mountains but not in the mountains. Neither East nor West, North or South. The Hollow-Man City; the place that everyone forgets… or tries to. The cosmic rendezvous at the event horizon; the bong-water swamp where memory ends. In short, the Vortex Sutra of All That Is and Nothing That Isn’t. The confused, abandoned, cardboard bastard child of America.

And yet – hahaha we stink. Almost exactly half the time. Meaning all the mean things I said about Denver? They’re still half true, but we’ve got no room to swagger. Not despite, but precisely because of the last game.

The Naughty and Nice List, Quarta Edizione

• Naughty: Alexandr Valeryevich Semin. The Great 28. How disappointed are we; we who adore you? You don’t even get a funny comment, that’s how much. There’s nothing to laugh about anymore.
• Nice: Mike “Kanoooobs” Knuble has never disappointed, and Thursday night he again… failed to, um, not disappoint. Or something. Meaning Papa Knuble stands for everything that is awesome-sauce about the Knaps lately. Extra Xbox for the kiddies under the tree for you. But our special vánočka cookies go not to Santa but to his elf, Michal Neuvirth. Humbuggers may scoff at his stats (SV% .885) plopping him near the bottom of the NHL, but he’s shown dazzling sizzle (and other zazzley words we can’t think of right now) in moments throughout the season, and Thursday’s shut-out – though not of his own making – held moments of brilliance. Double-puppy-dog thanks to you, Neuvy.

OK, we’ve contractually gotta do this “Avs R Hawt” thing, so strap in. And to help us out, we’ve enlisted Michael “Bandito” Cox of GForce Hockey and some law skool or something out in Denver. The PuckBuddys pulled him away from his hotbox — haha, we mean finals! — long enough to offer some informed thoughts on the Avs. (ATTN prospective employers: we kid the kid – he’s straight-arrow, whip-smart, hot on his feet and has no earthly idea what a “hot box” is.)

What Makes Them Hot

1: Touche Douchene. Sure, he’s a little guy with a big ol’ -7, but Matt Duchene at 11G – 11A is second only to the comically named Ryan O’Reilly (who went to school with Paddy McShamrock) in total points, and still the Avs leading scorer. Says Cox: “He has some Crosby-esque, stylish moves up his sleeve that Caps should really watch out for, but this goal gets extra points.” So…apart from the C-word mention, he’s good. Oh, and if you’re so inclined, he’s also smokin’ hot.

Gabriel Landeskog

2: Names We Can’t Pronounce: Captain Milan Hejduk (9G, 12A, -5), the aging Czech right winger, and compatriot Gabriel Landeskog, the youthful left wing (5G, 8A, +4) are the sort of Yin/Yang to this team. Cox on Hejduk: “Their Knuble equivalent, and he’s even more of a papa because the next oldest forward is 29. Been with the Avs since ’98, he’s their captain and go-to veteran.” And on the other blondier one, simply: “He’s their Viking Warrior God.” We’ve seen pics of said deity, and we can confirm our colleague’s astute assessment.

Semyon Varlamov

 3: Space Cadet: Oh, guess what tonight is! Dinner with our Ex! Well, that’s always fun, eh? Yeah, we’re meeting up once more with Semyon Varlamov (SV .896%) near-giant Russian slab o’ puck-stoppin’ treat…and ex-Cap. And still handsome as hell. Says analyst Cox: “Some nights he’s a jedi, others he’s a space cadet.” We still miss you, Varlmonster, although we’re not missing what you didn’t do in our crease. That just sounded obscene. Anyway, you get it: Varly & Neuvy (we expect) face off. Russia v. Czech Republic. Vodka v. Pivo. Them v. Us. Sorry Varly, you’re off our Christmas card list.

What Makes Them Not

1: Is That A Stat, Or A Demographic? Oh harhar, the Avs are 14-17-1, placing them somewhere behind the Oilers and the Sun City Retirement Village Senores Y Senoritas squad. Not that that’s stopped us before from ignominious (look it up) defeat. Still, if you want to get your confidence back but you’re not quite at all confident, why not pick on the smaller kid? Oh that’s right, because it’s douchey. But may also be a path back to Caps believing in themselves again.

2: Deep Thoughts: From future 1-percenter and current forward Michael Cox: “Dale Hunter spent his final year in the NHL with the Avalanche when they went to the western conference finals, but they lost. We traded Varly to the Avs for a 1st round pick next year and a 2nd round pick in 2013 (Thanks Colorado!), Fliechman spent last year with the Avs before going to Florida, Scott Hannan (gone now) the D-man last year came from the Avs.” So…if I’m reading this right, the Avalanche is sort of the Caps dumping ground. Hmmm?  No? Well, let’s dump on them all the same.

Meme of the Night

I feel like I’ve seen this person before… (Photo credit: Mitchell Layton)

Fans enter Verizon Center before the season-opener. (Photo credit: Chris Gordon)

One hundred fifty-seven days. That’s a long summer for Caps fans. And Saturday night at 7:09 P.M. Eastern Time when six ounces of vulcanized rubber tumbled toward the ice sheet it was finally over.

“The atmosphere was great,” Alex Ovechkin told reporters after the game. “The fans push us forward all the time. It’s nice to play at home, especially the first game. I know everybody was missing hockey here so it’s nice to come back.”

The trademarks of Caps hockey were all there last night: Sam Wolk pursed his lips to his horn and let lout three loud blasts at the drop of the puck; Wes Johnson bellowed out the name of Alexander Semin (heavy on the “r”) after Washington lit the lamp for the first time this season on Sasha’s tally; William Stilwell, better known as the Goat, let out a thunderous roar of “Let’s Go Caps!” as he stomped the metal beneath his feet when shown on the big screen in the second period.

There have been pre-season games (eight of them to be exact) and practices — a convention too. But nothing lives up to games that actually matter — or maybe do not matter depending on how you look at it. And Caps fans were ready. 18,506 of them packed Verizon Center, good for a sellout crowd at 100.6 percent of capacity, a number that makes sense if you don’t think about it.

“I’m super excited that they’re back,” Caps fan Jenn McAdoo said. “I felt last year they were trying to stay angry. Let’s just hope this year they stay in the playoffs.”

The off-season, which like all recent ones has begun much too early for the Caps’ liking, was one of change. Former playoff stud and ceiling enthusiast Semyon Varlamov was shipped to Denver, though he probably should do some stretching before hitting the slopes in Colorado. Eric Fehr, too, now plays for another team. Same goes for Matt Bradley, Boyd Gordon, Jason Arnott, Scott Hannan, and Marco Sturm (who was in D.C. for about half has much time as it will take you to read this post). But the team now boasts a new starting netminder — actually, that part might be complicated — in Tomas Vokoun. The D-corps have also received a veteran boost thanks to the acquisition of Roman Hamrlik. The forwards now feature the Hebrew Hammer Jeff Halpern along with former Moose Jaw Warrior Troy Brouwer and former Owen Sound Plater Joel Ward (I love junior hockey). And for fans before 2009 (those exist?), fan favorite Olie Kolzig is also back as a coach.

But enough about the summer. Now it’s finally time for hockey. Glorious hockey.

“I’m really excited for the season to be back because the off-season sucks,” said Caps fan Amanda Hill.

“I have to admit, at the beginning of last year I was a little blasé,” the Goat said. “It was really kind of the status quo team and there was no real reason to think anything had changed. … Starting on July 1st I just felt, ‘This is it; this is a regular season to be excited about because we could actually see a different team out there.’”

“There’re a lot of guys on the Caps that have something to prove and I’m looking forward to seeing them prove it,” he continued.

Washington plans do just that. And though they may be professionals, the team can still get a case of the butterflies.

Said Head Coach Bruce Boudreau: “The crowd’s into it, there are a lot of new guys. Nerves were there. It’s like the first day on the job and going into the office — you’re nervous. Whether you’re a 20-year veteran on the job or just brand new.”

If you took a break from hockey after May 4th, when the Tampa Bay Lightning swept the Washington Capitals out of the playoffs, we completely understand. It was rough. But the new season is here, along with reasons for renewed hope. So in case you’ve been avoiding hockey in general and this blog in particular, we’ve prepared a primer to catch you up.

Here is everything you need to know about the Washington Capitals but were afraid to ask (2011-2012 edition).

Who won the cup?

Boston Bruins. Tim Thomas was a monster. So was their bar tab.

Where’s Semyon Varlamov?

On July 30th, we thought that Varly was headed to the KHL. But the rumor was dubiously sourced, two teams (SKA and Lokomotiv Yaroslavl) disputed Varlamov’s negotiation rights, and the Caps weren’t talking. On July 1st, the first day of free agency, the Capitals dealt Varly to the Colorado Avalanche in exchange for some very nice draft picks. As a condition of that deal, if the Avs don’t to make the playoffs those picks get even better.

Who else is gone?

Most of the team’s free agents:

• Matt Bradley was signed by the Florida Panthers.
• Boyd Gordon was signed by the Phoenix Coyotes.
• Jason Arnott is a member of the St. Louis Blues.
• Marco Sturm is in Vancouver on a gig for the Canucks.
• Scott Hannan will play for the Calgary Flames this year.
• And F16 Eric Fehr is a member of the brand-spanking new Winnipeg Jets. Yeah, more on that in a moment.

And Brooks Laich is back?

Is he ever! Brooks Laich signed a monster 6-year, $27M contract on June 28th. You’ll be getting lost in those eyes through 2018.

Who is this new goalie?

“New” is a relative term. Tomas Vokoun is a 35-year-old Czech goalie most recently out of Florida. Because he wants to play on a team with a chance at victory, Vokoun agreed to take a serious pay cut to play for the Caps. This is very good news, as Vokoun is an elite goaltender with a very real chance at the Vezina Trophy for best goalie this year. As sad as I’m sure you are about losing Semyon Varlamov, be heartened that the team has added someone this talented.

Who’s new on defense?

On July 1st George McPhee signed Roman Hamrlik, a grizzled vet who has spent the last four years with the Montreal Canadiens, to a 2-year, $7M contract. Hamrlik represents the added depth and experience that GMGM was looking for in the defensive zone. You can expect him to pair up with Dennis Wideman.

Who’s new up front?

That would be Joel Ward, who got a 4-year, $12M contract with the team on free agency day. Ward distinguished himself with a superb playoff performance with Nashville, scoring seven goals in 12 games, and he has a reputation as a defensively minded forward and hardy penalty killer. With the Caps’ apparent evaporation of secondary scoring, Ward will be expected to produce this year.

And don’t forget Troy Brouwer, who was picked up on draft day. Brouwer is what GMGM calls a “power forward”, a tough guy who will likely see time on the top two lines. McPhee thinks he might put up 20 goals this season.

And what’s this I hear about Olie Kolzig?

Vezina and King Clancy winner and the winning-est goalie in Capitals history, Olaf “Olie” Kolzig has rejoined the team as associate goaltending coach! Olie intends to be here for a while and has sold his insane mansion in the pacific northwest. If you’ll forgive a momentary brag, we talked to Kolzig back in February and told us then he was enthusiastic about future relations with his old team. Maybe we’ll see number 37 retired soon?

Any other new old faces? Maybe one that’ll actually play?

Hell yeah! Caps veteran Jeff Halpern is back with a one-year contract. Halpy was a Cap from 1999 until 2004 and says he “jumped at the opportunity to come back” to the team that launched his NHL career. Between this and the return of Olie, you can expect to see noticeably more blue/black/bronze jerseys around Chinatown this year.

How about those injuries last year?

Dennis Wideman missed the playoffs after a nasty hit to the leg from Carolina’s Tuomo Ruutu (checked: still not a Star Wars character) at the end of the regular season. We heard it was “just a bruise”, but it turned out to be something gross called “compartment syndrome.” Wideman is looking good in the preseason and should be playing on opening night.

Tom Poti missed most of last year with a nagging groin injury. We usually make jokes about groin injuries here, but Poti’s ailment is seriously endangering his hockey career. Tom failed his physical and will likely be on injured reserve status this year.

Any cool drama I need to know about?

Alright, get this: Matt Bradley gives an interview to a Florida radio station and says that Alex Semin doesn’t care. Then David Steckel kinda-sorta says the same thing. And then everyone else jumps to Semin’s defense. And then the dude himself gives two English-language video interviews, which kinda makes you think someone in the organization was really worried about this meme. Speaking of memes, we made some bar graphs about the whole kerfuffle.

In other news, Alex Ovechkin slouched in an interview with Mike Vogel, leading everyone to think he got fat. A subsequent onslaught of notables (including Ted Leonsis himself) defended Alex’s fitness. This in no way justified and perpetuated a ludicrous story that should have been ignored by all sensible people except us and Dan Steinberg.

Just recently the Caps tried out white netting instead of black netting behind the ice, creating a kind of snowblindness for fans who sit at funny angles. People complained, and the white netting lasted exactly one game. Don’t laugh; we actually have to read and write about this stuff.

And any blatant gimmickry I should be aware of?

For 16 road games this year, the Caps will be wearing their third jersey, which is basically the Winter Classic uni. Most of those games will be in February and March, when the Caps will be on the road a lot.

What utterly trivial things did RMNB write about this year?

Nothing except the earthshaking drama of Alex Ovechkin playing soccer, Alex Ovechkin dressing like a wookiee, Alex Ovechkin wearing sweatpants over his jeans, and Alex Ovechkin being on a candy bar.

Hook me up with some #fancystats.

My favorite piece by Neil this summer was The Sasha Index, which tracks how Alex Semin’s janusian nature affects the team’s performance by inventing a brand new statistical metric. You might also be interested in Jeff Halpern’s projected output, the lofty expectations placed on Alex Ovechkin, and who Nick Backstrom should play with.

What’s up with the Caps on the radio?

Longtime Caps play-by-play man Steve Kolbe did not have his contract with the team renewed over the summer. In his place, John Walton, former PR boss and play-by-play guy for the Hershey Bears, will be doing radio and other stuff. Scott Stuccio takes over for the Bears.

How was your summer, Russian Machine Never Breaks?

Oh not bad; thanks for asking. Neil has been contributing to ESPN Insider in addition to WaPo’s Capitals Insider. Ian has two ferrets. I’ve got a new bulldog named Georgia who sits on my coffee table when I’m not home. Chris got his pubes. Fedor and Igor are still Russian, and Rachel is working on her artist chops.

We’ve got bigger news, but let’s save that for later in the week.

What’s going on in the rest of the NHL?

The Atlanta Thrashers are history. The franchise has become the Winnipeg Jets, restoring the team that left for Phoenix in ’96. Manitoba native and newly minted Jet Eric Fehr is particularly happy about this news. The sucky part is that the ‘Peg is still technically in the NHL’s Southeast division, so there’s gonna be a lot of travelling for SE teams this year. The NHL will realign next season.

Sidney Crosby is still recovering from the concussion he suffered at the beginning of 2011. There is no timetable for his return.

Perhaps Washington’s most reviled ex-player, Jaromir Jagr, has returned to the NHL. He will play for the Philadelphia Flyers.

Speaking of Philly, the Winter Classic of 2012 will pit them against the Rangers.

Sean Avery is still a douchebag, but now with a heart of gold. Matt Cooke is still a thug, but wants to reform. The Sedins are still creepy, and that’ll never change. Martin St. Louis is still lilliputian, and he probably wears lifts in his shoes.

What are the expectations for the Caps this year?

Oh man. Well they struggled a bit in the preseason, but let’s pretend that doesn’t matter.

As of right now, The gambling site Bodog has the Caps tied with the Canucks to win the cup at 7:1. Puck Daddy’s profile on the team predicts they’ll advance to the conference finals at least. As long as no one paints any oil paintings, this thing should be a lock.

Crash the net.

Illustrations and layout by Ian Oland; Capitals photos by Chris Gordon.

When George McPhee traded Semyon Varlamov to Colorado in early July, not only did he gain the roster flexibility to sign Vezina-hopeful Tomas Vokoun to a discounted one-year pact, he also netted two valuable assets from the Avalanche: a first-round pick in the 2012 NHL Entry Draft and a second-round selection in either 2012 or 2013.

In a year’s time, Colorado could seriously regret this deal. Why? With two injury-prone goalies in Varlamov and Jean-Sebastien Giguere, and an offense that has few proven scorers, the Avalanche could fall into the lottery or possibly even finish dead-last in the West. That would give the Capitals a chance to pick in the top five for the first time in five years (they nabbed Karl Alzner fifth overall in 2007). It also presents McPhee and company with a shot at bringing a new Russian superstar to DC. His name: Nail Yakupov.

Let’s get you caught up. Yakupov was selected second overall by the Sarnia Sting in the 2010 Canadian Hockey League (CHL) Import Draft. Before this, he played in the Russian junior league (MHL) for his hometown team, Reaktor Nizhnekamsk. Instead of biding his time and trying his luck in the KHL with Reaktor’s parent-team, Neftekhimik Nizhnekamsk, Nail thought joining the Ontario Hockey League would be a quicker path to his dream to play in the National Hockey League.

So far, his decision looks to have paid off. Yakupov is currently ranked number one in the vast majority of prospect rankings, though it’s still too early to make any stone-cold predictions for next year. However, many analysts say that Yakupov “has it all” and will surely go number one come draft time in 2012.

In his first year with the Sting, the 17-year-old 5′ 11″ 167 lb. winger was named the OHL’s Rookie of the Month three times. He also broke records previously set by current NHL superstar Steven Stamkos. At the same age, Stamkos posted 42 goals and 92 points. Nail finished his season with 49 goals and 101 points, winning both the OHL and CHL’s Rookie of the Year awards.

For those of you who have never seen him play, here’s a video — with glorious techno music of course — of Yakupov dominating in the OHL:

Wow. After watching this, it’s hard to disagree with the praise Nail’s earned from HockeyProspect:

Maybe the easiest way to compare Nail Yakupov is a smaller version of Alexander Ovechkin. Although it is extremely unlikely for Nail to reach Alexander’s 6’3” 225lb size, he plays a very similar game and has a great number of similar traits.

Travis Yost, HockeyBuzz’s Senators and OHL blogger, agrees:

With as much strength as there is at the top of the draft, the Washington Capitals have to be absolutely salivating. In a best case scenario, imagine that the Avalanche completely tank, and the Capitals go and grab the venerable Nail Yakupov from the Sarnia Sting.

By all accounts, Yakupov is already NHL ready and could hit the National Hockey League as a blue-chip. You know, the ‘can’t-miss’ prospect that’s sure to dominate the league for years and years to come.

A player of his talent could single-handedly marginalize the probable loss of Alexander Semin, who should be in another hockey city come 2012. And, you’d have to imagine Yakupov would love playing alongside one of his country’s most respected and heralded players in Alexander Ovechkin.

Despite his limited size and Russian hockey education, Yakupov is not a complete liability on defense. He also can play both wings — just like fellow Russian Evgeny Kuznetsov. He’s also not afraid to mix it up.

Or check someone through the glass.

So, Caps fans, let’s hope for an awful season from the Avs this year. I truly believe Nail Yakupov is a superstar in the making, a perfect player to compliment Ovechkin and eventually replace an expensive — and possibly declining — Alex Semin on the second line. And really, it’s nothing personal, Colorado. You’ve won your championships. You have your banners. Now it’s time for the Caps to have some good luck!

Additional reporting by Ian Oland.

September 7, 2011 will be remembered as one of the worst days in hockey history. An airplane carrying the KHL’s Lokomotiv Yaroslavl team crashed just after takeoff from Tunoshna Airport, 11 miles southeast of Yaroslavl in central Russia. The team was on its way to Belarus, where they were set to begin their regular season against Dynamo Minsk.

The aircraft was an Yakovlev Yak-42, an outdated Soviet-era plane that was due to be phased out next year. In Russia the plane is known for its woeful air safety record, and just two months ago 44 people were killed when an Antonov-24 caught fire in midair before crashing in western Siberia. There have been eight fatal crashes in Russia just this year.

According to Slava Malamud of Sport Express, Kommersant, a Russian newspaper, reported Yak-Service, the airliner operating the plane, was ranked last by the European Air Safety Commission. The New York Times reported that the company, founded in 1993, was suspended for three months in 2009 by Russian authorities because of “major safety deficiencies.” The BBC reports that the aircraft broke into two pieces after hitting a radio mast before crashing into Volga river. The Times notes that eight Yak-42s have crashed over the years, killing 570.

“It was wobbling in flight, it was clear that something was wrong,” an eyewitness told the BBC. “I saw them pulling bodies to the shore, some still in their seats with seat belts on.”

There are 45 confirmed fatalities of Wednesday’s crash, including all but one player on Yaroslavl’s roster — which includes former NHLers Pavol Demitra, Ruslan Salei, Karel Rachunek, Karlis Skarastins, Josef Vasicek, and Alexander Vasyunov along with their head coach Brad McCrimmon.

“We have no team any more,” Lokomotiv spokesman Vladimir Malkov told The Times, “they all burned in the crash.”

Demitra, a three-time All-Star and Lady Byng winner, retired from international hockey in May. This video from his last game with Slovakia is poignant.

There are two known survivors of the crash — a male flight attendant and forward Alexander Galimov, who is listed in “extremely critical” condition according to Sport-Express.

The KHL’s season opener between Salavat Yulaev and Atlant was in progress when news about the tragedy broke, and was stopped after nearly 15 minutes had been played. KHL president Alexander Medvedev said the KHL season will go on as scheduled starting tomorrow.

According to RMNB’s Fedor Fedin, the mood across Russia is somber. Almost every channel on television is devoted to news of the crash, and grizzly pictures have been broadcast.

Meanwhile, reactions to the tragedy have come pouring in from the hockey community, and NHL.com has put together an extensive, though heartbreaking, collection of tweets from League players.

As for the Capitals, the catastrophe hits close to come for some players.

“I knew [Alexander Kalyanin] well, and I also know his father Igor Viktorovich well, who was a coach for Traktor,” Evengy Kuznetsov told KP Chelyabinsk. “It’s tough to talk right now. My condolences to his family.”

Former Capitals goalie Semyon Varlamov told Malamud he was ”in shock” and couldn’t say anything else. Varlamov played in Lokomotiv’s organization for four years, including two with the main club.

“It’s kind of a scary moment,” said a shaken Alex Ovechkin, via The Washington Times’ Stephen Whyno. “It’s a whole national tragedy.”

Fellow Russian Stanislav Galiev who, like Ovechkin, knew some of the players on the team, was also moved.

Candles are lit in tribute of Lokomotiv Yaroslavl in Prague’s Old Town Square.

“I am shocked,” Galiev said, again via Whyno. “It’s very sad.”

Whyno also reports that new Capitals goalie Tomas Vokoun declined to comment on the crash, saying his best friend was on board.

“Gloomy day in DC and even worse news in Russia,” defenseman John Carlson tweeted. “Prayers to all the family/friends associated today.”

“I heard about the accident, and I can’t say anything other than what happened today is just awful,” Nicklas Backstrom told Hockeysverige.se, as translated by @Rabiesmalin, about countryman Stefan Liv. ”First, Stefan was a very good friend of mine, and then that the whole team was killed in the accident. You can say nothing bad about Stefan as a friend. He was a very happy and positive person and he always had a smile on his face. The news was awful to receive and hard to comprehend.”

The league echoed their players’ sentiments.

“Though it occurred thousands of miles away from our home arenas, this tragedy represents a catastrophic loss to the hockey world — including the NHL family, which lost so many fathers, sons, teammates and friends who at one time excelled in our League,” NHL commissioner Gary Bettman said in a statement. “Our deepest condolences go to the families and loved ones of all who perished.”

The same goes for us at RMNB.

Photo credit: Chris Gordon

We all know Alex Ovechkin loves to have fun, and now we have this fantastic new anecdote — thanks to Alex Ovetjkin — from former Caps netminder Semyon Varlamov who spoke to Artem Lisovsky of KP.RU.

Capitals forward Alexander Ovechkin is a famous prankster. On April Fools’ day he almost got the entire team!

“On April Fools’ Day Ovechkin came up to me and said, ‘It’s urgent, call General Manager George McPhee. He seems very unhappy and angry.’ I got scared and thought it was something really serious because it was never before like this. I called George and asked him what happened. And he answered, ‘Listen, what the hell? [The entire team's] called me and asked what has happened. My phone is off the hook!’ It turned out that Ovechkin pranked us all. We laughed for a long time afterwards. But our head coach got it the worst. Ovechkin asked him to call the Owner of the team, billionaire Ted Leonsis. When this happens, it means you are either getting fired, or you are in a serious trouble. Our coach called, but got Leonsis’s answering machine. Only then Ovechkin explained that it was a joke. The coach was swearing like a sailor!”

As it turns out, this isn’t the first time Ovi has played master prankster.

Or this!

And oh yeah, this!

Is there anything else we missed?

Photo credit: Chris Gordon

A few weeks ago, Dmitry Orlov completed his third Capitals Development Camp, flying back to his hometown of Novokuznetsk immediately after its completion. The 20-year-old Orlov will continue to train in Russia until heading back to Washington in September for his first ever NHL training camp.

Three weeks ago, Sports.ru’s Andrey Osadchenko had a fascinating Q & A with Dima, with the Caps prospect going in-depth on his time in Hershey, who impressed him most at the AHL level, and his goals for the upcoming season. Orlov — who’s been involved in a few altercations during his time in the KHL — also revealed if anyone tried to fight him during his time with the Bears.

Below, RMNB’s Igor Kleyner translates the interview.

Dump and Chase

Andrey Osadchenko: You radically changed your surroundings during the last season. You played half a year for Kuznya, and then you went on to the AHL. Did it create additional complications for your adjustment process to the North American hockey?

Dmitry Orlov: Yes, it wasn’t easy, I needed some time. I did not know much English, so in the beginning I couldn’t even understand the coach. I knew a little bit, but mostly Kugryshev was helping me. Of course later on, toward the end of the season, I could — to a degree — communicate with the coach. We could discuss hockey issues. It turned out that the season for Novokuznetsk ended in February, it was too early. So my agent and I decided to move to America. In the end, I managed to play for two and a half more months and signed a contract with Washington.

Andrey Osadchenko: It was somewhat unusual to see you wearing not the usual number 9, but 27. Why did you pick that number?

Dmitry Orlov: I was given a choice between 27 and 34. I decided to go with 27. There were no other options, including number 9. Because that number belonged to someone else who played for Hershey in the past, and now the number is retired. So I was told:  ’Sorry, but there is no way.’

Andrey Osadchenko: When our goalies move across the ocean, they point out that they have to be more involved in the game because there are more shots on goal. Forwards talk about the difference in the way the attacking play develops and in the number of physical one-on-one battles. What was the biggest adjustment for you, as a defenseman?

Dmitry Orlov: For us, there is also a lot of physical confrontation along the boards, when the puck is dumped into the zone. You need to get to the puck as soon as possible, and then either pass to your partner, or bring the puck out of the zone by yourself. Meanwhile, you have to avoid being hit. I realized that defensemen there are getting hit a lot. In Russia very rarely do you see such physical game against a defenseman. But there, they are getting it even more than forwards.

Andrey Osadchenko: Is there anything in the North American style that you don’t like?

Dmitry Orlov: Not really. Because it was my own choice. I want to play in America. That is my life. How could I possibly not like it? I play the game, and I enjoy it. Certain things are hard, but there is nothing you can do about it.

Andrey Osadchenko: A lot of our players aren’t very appreciative of the great number of fights in the AHL.

Dmitry Orlov: Actually, I wouldn’t say there are that many fights. And about the AHL, the talk is that it’s such a meat grinder, they almost kill there. So, I played there. Yes, there is a lot of hard hitting. Yes, there is fighting. But most of them are between the fighters. I feel all right about fighting. If you can fight – fight. If you can’t – play hockey.

Not afraid to mix it up: Orlov (#9 in white) gets in a fight with Alexander Aksenenko in a January 10, 2010 KHL match against Amur.

Andrey Osadchenko: Has anybody challenged you to a fight yet?

Dmitry Orlov: No, I have not had to fight yet. I am not a fighter, I am trying to play hockey. But if a situation comes up, of course I may have to get into a fight. It’s not that big of a deal. Sometimes you have to stand up for yourself or your partner.

Andrey Osadchenko: In Russia, the North American style is often disparaged as “dump and chase”. Do you agree with that?

Dmitry Orlov: To a degree, yes. There is plenty of dump and chase, but there is also normal hockey. The third and fourth lines mostly just dump and chase. But the first two lines try to be creative. The guys who play on the first and second lines know how to play. I think that is how the game is played everywhere now. Even in Russia. The third and fourth lines are mostly physical, and the top two are more oriented toward creativity and power play.

Rare Interview

Andrey Osadchenko: You came to the AHL with about twenty games to go in the regular season, but still managed to get a micro-injury even in such short period of time. Was it just an unfortunate accident or something else?

Dmitry Orlov: It was just a groin pull. I wasn’t hit, there was no contact. After the game the coaches came to me and told me – if you need to, you better rest it. There was only one or two games left.

Andrey Osadchenko: Have you ever heard any instructions from the coaches that you did not fully agreed with?

Dmitry Orlov: No. Hershey plays the same system as Washington – a carbon copy. We played all right, and the coaching instructions were fine.

Andrey Osadchenko: Are you happy with your stats in the regular season? Nine points in 19 games for a rookie defenseman — those are very decent numbers.

Dmitry Orlov: I would have liked something better. Besides, my plus-minus ended up being minus-seven, I think. At first everything was going well, and then something stopped working — we were constantly scored against during my shift. Although, during the playoffs I managed to rehabilitate myself. By then, my adjustment period was over. And my plus-minus was completely different.

Andrey Osadchenko: Did you keep the puck that you scored your first AHL goal with, or did you not think of it as an important milestone in your career.

Dmitry Orlov: I got the puck. As soon as I scored, our captain skated over, grabbed the puck and gave it to the team doctor. They put tape on it and wrote ‘The first AHL goal scored against such and such team.’ They gave it to me after the game. It’s at home now.

Andrey Osadchenko: In the NHL they usually put it in a pretty frame with a photo.

Dmitry Orlov: Oh, please! This is not the NHL, so… (Smiles)

Andrey Osadchenko: Did you feel a lot of attention from the media in America?

Dmitry Orlov: No. I only have had a couple of interviews so far. The first one – right after I came here. A Russian man (guess who?) came to me right after my first game for Hershey. And the second one, when I was in Washington. I couldn’t go on a road trip to Canada with the team because I did not have visa. I was at the Capitals game with Rangers, and another Russian reporter came to me. And that’s all.

Andrey Osadchenko: Some of our players say that they prefer to interact with the foreign press. Do you in any way differentiate the journalists by their nationality?

Dmitry Orlov: No. If they ask, why not answer. I don’t see any problem with that. It’s a normal situation. If they are interested, we should talk.

Golf – it’s interesting, but hard.

Andrey Osadchenko: Hershey is referred to as Chocolate Town because of the world famous chocolate factory. Have you tried the local sweets yet?

Dmitry Orlov: Haven’t had a chance. But you can smell the chocolate in the town.

Andrey Osadchenko: We often hear that in North America our players are almost mandated to consume a lot of protein. Is this also the case at Hershey?

Dmitry Orlov: Yes, the guys do drink protein shakes and various recovery drinks. But I don’t. I don’t need to gain weight. I am doing all right as far as that goes.

Andrey Osadchenko: Hershey is a tiny town. Were you bored on your days off?

Dmitry Orlov: Yes, it is a bit of a problem of course. We spent almost all of our spare time at home, taking naps during the day. Quite boring, there is nowhere to go. Yes, we go out to dinner, lunch, once we went to play golf, went to the movies. That’s where I study the language. When I come to a camp, or anywhere else, everybody tells me to watch movies in English – that it’s very useful. So that’s what I try to do, even during flights. It does help.

Andrey Osadchenko: Everybody says that it is difficult to understand Americans because they talk very fast.

Dmitry Orlov: I agree. I noticed that too. If they speak fast, I can’t tell the words apart, so I can’t understand what they say.

Andrey Osadchenko: There is another Russian playing for Hershey – Dmitry Kugryshev. Have you taught your teammates any Russian words yet?

Dmitry Orlov: (Laughs) Just ‘Hi’ and ‘Bye.’ Nothing else.

Andrey Osadchenko: And how do you like golf?

Dmitry Orlov: I like it. I played for the first time, but I would love to try again. As far as golf goes, Hershey is pretty good. The owner of the local golf course has a good relationship with the team president, so the players go there and play for free. Play as much as you wish, no one will say anything.

Andrey Osadchenko: Do hockey skills help with golf in any way?

Dmitry Orlov: The technique is completely different. Very difficult. But interesting.

“The WJC is won– the season is over”

Andrey Osadchenko: In Hershey, were they nagging you with questions about the scandal after the WJC final?

Dmitry Orlov: Everybody wanted to know. Everybody was asking. Everybody who had heard about it was inquiring, asking questions. What happened? How? The issue was drawing a lot of attention.

Andrey Osadchenko: What did you say?

Dmitry Orlov: I said that everything was normal and calm. We did not misbehave, did not do anything horrible. Just calmly boarded the flight. Perhaps, someone did not like something. I have no idea what. Honestly, I don’t even want to remember all that.

Andrey Osadchenko: Have the emotions from the victory calmed down, or do you still get goose bumps when you think about it?

Dmitry Orlov: Of course I think about it. Whenever I see the video – I get goose bumps. After the WJC, for a long time I could not calm down. There was such a feeling of euphoria, it was even difficult to go on the ice. I couldn’t even think about it. It felt like the end of the season. We won the world championship – and that’s it, the season is over. But that was not the case. Then I realized that I have to think about hockey, the season was still going on. I understood not to live in the past.

The task – to fight my way into Washington this year.

Andrey Osadchenko: Sheldon Souray played for Hershey last year. They say his shot is even harder than Chara’s. Did you notice?

Dmitry Orlov: Yes, we played as a pair. He really does have an awesome shot. There is a good reason he has played in the NHL. Someone to learn from.

Andrey Osadchenko: You also have a hard shot. Did you ask Souray for any pointers on how to improve your shot?

Dmitry Orlov: No. Some just have a gift for it. He is really-really big. And the shot really depends on that a lot.

Andrey Osadchenko: Among the AHL players, who made the biggest impression on you?

Dmitry Orlov: A defenseman from Connecticut named Wade Redden. Just like Souray, he plays for the farm-club, but his salary comes from the Rangers. He is a very good player. I don’t understand what he is doing in the AHL.

Andrey Osadchenko: Are you surprised that the Capitals decided not to sign Semyon Varlamov to a new contract?

Dmitry Orlov: Well… I think if they had made him a good offer, he would have stayed. But since they could not agree on something, trade. Which is normal. Now Semyon has signed with Colorado, and I wish him the best. Yes, I would like for Washington to have more Russian players, but that’s how it worked out. He is a good goalie. He was just unlucky with injuries.

Andrey Osadchenko: Having spent half a year in Canadian Juniors, Maxim Kitsyn returned to Metallurg. Why did you decide to follow a different path and coming back to the AHL.

Dmitry Orlov: He has a contract, but I was released.

Andrey Osadchenko: Last summer you said that you had two more years to go on your contract with Kuznya. Did you have to buy it out?

Dmitry Orlov: No, they let me go. They said: ‘We are giving you a chance. Go, prove yourself. If it doesn’t work out, come back to us. Our doors are always open for you.’

Andrey Osadchenko: Do you think you have a better chance of making it to the NHL via the AHL, rather than the KHL?

Dmitry Orlov: That’s what I decided. I want to test myself there. Washington has been calling for me for three years already. They told me, sorry, but we are not going to wait for long. It was not a spontaneous decision. I have wanted it for a long time. I asked for it, and they let me go, gave me my chance. Now I have to prove that it wasn’t all for naught. Whether I get to stay with Washington, or they send me back to the farm club, we’ll see after the camp.

Andrey Osadchenko: There is a great deal of competition in Washington now for the roster spots on defense. Are you afraid?

Dmitry Orlov: What do I have to fear? If they send me back to the AHL, I’ll play there. I will be proving that I deserve to play in the NHL. I didn’t sign a three-year contract for nothing. I don’t give up. I will fight for it.

Andrey Osadchenko: Do you set a target for yourself as to when you need to make the main team?

Dmitry Orlov: Of course I do. I have my goals for the season, and I want to meet them. For example, to make it to Washington – this year. I will give my best effort to achieve that.

Additional reporting by Ian Oland.

Photo credit: Chris Gordon

When George McPhee swooped in and signed free agent goalie Tomas Vokoun for a couple bucks and Alex Ovechkin’s now useless stockpile of CCM sticks, there was no doubt it was a great move for the Washington Capitals. But that doesn’t mean everyone was happy with it. 21-year-old netminder Braden Holtby, who looked assured of a roster spot just a day before when the team traded away Semyon Varlamov, was once again relegated to a job with the AHL’s Hershey Bears.

We know what Michal Neuvirth, the remaining ‘keeper in the Caps’ trio, thinks about the deal and losing his starting spot. Holtby, however, has been somewhat of a mystery, with head coach Bruce Boudreau admitting during Development Camp even he hasn’t spoken to the Saskatchewan native about the move.

Unbeknownst to us (but not Hockey Ramblings), someone has been able get Holtby’s side of the story. Several weeks ago, The Pipeline Show on Team 1260 Edmonton caught up the young goalie, with Holtby spilling the beans on the crease situation, Nicklas Backstrom’s injuries, why he didn’t think the team’s defensive system was much of a change, and more.

Below, we offer a transcription.

The Pipeline Show: You had a pretty impressive 14 games in the NHL this year. How gratifying was it? How comfortable were you to play that well?

Braden Holtby: Yeah, it was obviously a great experience all year. It was a lot more than I was expecting coming into the year. The 14 games were spread out through the whole season so it there was actually a lot of experience in there. A couple ups and downs right at the start. I think I got a little overwhelmed with the presence of being in the NHL. I got a bit more comfortable in the end and got a few more wins.

The Pipeline Show: The Caps traded Varly to Colorado. I’m sure you were doing fist-pumps after that. Then a few days later, they sign Tomas Vokoun. What does that mean for you? What kind of emotional roller coaster did you go through?

Braden Holtby: Yeah, it was a tough week, obviously,  just because it kind of came out of nowhere in the middle of the summer. It was a pretty big high and a pretty big low. At the same time, it’s basically the same setup as last year. I still have a lot to win in Hershey. I wasn’t really proud of the way I finished out the season down in the AHL. That’s one thing that I really want to work on. Obviously, the sophomore season is going to be the toughest one. Whenever I get called up again, it’s going to be even more valuable experience to play in the NHL.

The Pipeline Show: What has the Vokoun signing taught you about patience?

Braden Holtby: Obviously, I want to play a lot, so I guess that’s one positive coming out of it is that I probably won’t be a back-up to start — I’ll be able to play a lot of games. At the same time, in Saskatoon, I played a lot and I learned to be able to play a lot of games and be more in shape. At the same time, when you’re a back-up or not playing as many games, you have to work twice as hard in the gym to keep that up and it’s not quite as easy. Being patient is tough, but it definitely makes you mentally stronger in the end.

The Pipeline Show: Is it a massive jump from the AHL to the NHL?

Braden Holtby: Really there’s some parts that are easier and some parts that are harder. I think [in the NHL] it’s a lot easier because your defensemen are in position. They always do the exact thing that you expect them to do. It makes it easier to read the play and whatnot. At the same time, the skill-level of the NHL is just so amazing, you kind of get caught up watching guys sometimes. That and obviously it’s the NHL. The aura of the NHL that goes around it, the pressure to perform, the big crowds, everyone seeing you or whatever, telling you what great job you did or not so good job you did on the streets. Just little differences like that. When it comes to playing on the ice, it’s really not a whole lot different. The speed is fairly similar, just the precision and skill level makes it harder.

The Pipeline Show: Bruce Boudreau installed a new defensive system this past year. How different was it from the run ‘n’ gun one that you guys played under before?

Braden Holtby: You know, I didn’t get to experience the other team so much. When I was up the year before, it really didn’t seem like that much of a change. When you bring in guys like Carlson and Alzner and they play 22 or 23 minutes a game, no matter what system you play in, you’re not going to have very many tough scoring chances to stop when you have guys like that on the ice. Bringing in a couple of key guys like Wideman and Hannan, they played a big role. I don’t think it was too much of a change in the system, I think it was just the defense just got that much better. People started to figure out the offense a bit. I know Nicklas Backstrom had a few injuries that guys didn’t really know about. I think everyone has that throughout the year. But that definitely made him not perform as well as he usually does. But, you got to give those guys a break. To perform at that level, it’s really hard to do that ever year. I wouldn’t be surprised if they came out and tore it up this upcoming season.

The Pipeline Show: Karl Alzner — is this guy still scratching the surface of his potential?

Braden Holtby: Yeah, you know he’s so amazingly good at the little things of hockey. You can watch a whole game and not even notice him. Then watch the game on film, watch him the whole time, and realize he never made one mistake the whole game. Those are the guys goalies absolutely love to have on their team. They probably don’t get the praise that they should. His hockey sense, his hand-eye coordination with his stick is absolutely amazing to watch. It’s definitely a big positive to be able to play behind him.

The Pipeline Show: You spent a lot of time in Hershey. What can you tell us about what Sheldon Souray was like down there?

Braden Holtby: Sheldon, from the moment he got to Hershey, he had about probably 10 times better of an attitude than anyone was expecting. You can’t really blame a guy if he comes down there and doesn’t really work as hard or whatnot because he’s been in the NHL for so long. He battled every game. He was fighting for us — big hits, sticking up for guys. He was just good guy to have on the team. He really taught a lot of us how to be professional and to perform in the professional ranks over a series of an 80 or 82 game season whether it’s in the NHL or the AHL. He was a positive influence in the dressing room. Always joking around having fun with guys. We’re all glad to see he got another chance in the NHL.

Additional reporting by Chris Gordon.

Photo credit: Greg Fiume

When the Washington Capitals traded away oft-injured but skilled goaltender Semyon Varlamov, General Manager George McPhee said the team was more than comfortable using two relatively inexperienced netminders in Michal Neuvirth, 23-years-old, and Braden Holtby, 21, for the 2011-12 season — after all, he had done so the previous year with Neuvirth and Varlamov in the crease. Less than 24 hours later, however, the tables turned when McPhee scooped up veteran Tomas Vokoun, one of the league’s elite goalies, for the bargain price of $1.5 million for one year.

“We were certainly willing to play our top young goaltenders, but I think people will agree this addition makes us deep again at the most important position in the game,” GMGM said at the time. “We love what we have in Holtby and we certainly love what we have in Neuvirth, but from an organizational standpoint, we’re all better off having this depth.”

Soon after the signing, Vokoun told reporters the Caps offered him no guarantees on the starting spot, but as a Vezina-caliber ‘keeper, Bruce Boudreau essentially gave him the nod over Neuvirth.

“If you’re looking at a guy that’s had the experience and done everything and been a number one goalie, you got to give Vokoun the respect that he’s coming in and he’s going to be the number one guy, and we’ll see where it goes from there,” the coach said.

So what does Neuvy think of all this? Well, that’s been largely an unknown — until now, that is. On Tuesday, he spoke with Czech Web site iSport.cz and said though Vokoun will no doubt take playing time away from him, he is excited that the veteran countryman could become a mentor.

“When I started to think about it, I realized that it’s actually really great,” Neuvirth told Frantisek Suchan of iSport.cz, as translated by RMNB’s Fedor Fedin. “He is a goalie I always looked up to.”

The Ústí nad Labem native — who signed a two-year, $2.3 million contract extension last September before completing a stellar first full season in the National Hockey League — said he was “happy” with his current deal. He added that he had “good feelings about the last season” was “looking forward to the next.”

While Neuvirth didn’t deny that he was somewhat disappointed Vokoun is being considered the number one, taking over his hard-earned starting role, he was adamant that his goal hasn’t changed.

“Yeah, that’s a pity,” he said to the Czech site. ”But I don’t care who is number one and who is number two right now. It’s summer, the season has not even begun. These talks don’t harm me at all. I’m going to camp with the same position as every year. I want to play as many games as possible, whether at the expense of Tomas Vokoun or Varly. I just want to play.”

Translation by Fedor Fedin.