The Washington Capitals have addressed their defensive woes in the worst way possible, signing former Penguin Brooks Orpik to a five-year, $27.5-million disaster of a deal.

Orpik, 33, has never played a full NHL season. He was a defensive defenseman in Pittsburgh, logging over 20 minutes a night. He has been outshot his whole career and hasn’t posted a positive relative possession score.

In Washington, he will likely will be used as a second pairing defenseman.

Let’s review Orpik’s career and his new contract:

  • Orpik played at the 2014 Olympics, maybe because the coach was Dan Bylsma.
  • Orpik concussed Loui Eriksson with a hit he was not suspended for.
  • Orpik has been on a steady offensive decline for years. It probably would have been more noticeable had he not played with two of the best players in the world.
  • Orpik will be 38 at the end of this contract.
  • Orpik is known as a poor skater and his contract with the Caps almost takes him over the hill.
  • Orpik will command Washington’s fourth highest cap hit next season.
  • Orpik’s salary is higher than anyone’s in this FA class (as of right now) except for Paul Stastny and Ryan Miller.

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Florida Panthers lose to the Washington Capitals 7-3

Alex Semin Getting Some With Cory Stillman (Both Photos by: Eliot J. Schechter)

Above: Alex Semin Getting Nasty With Cory Stillman, Top: Tomas Vokoun Getting Some Love From The Florida Fans (Both Photos by: Eliot J. Schechter)

I’ll be honest, I’ve never been more bored by a drubbing than tonight’s 7-3 Caps victory over the Florida Panthers. Maybe it was because Japers Rink’s FREE ALEX signs got more facetime than the Russian Machine did. Maybe it was because the hundreds of people who WERE in attendance at BankAtlantic Center in Sunrise, Florida, were practically comatose during the entire game. Or maybe it was because Florida’s team defense was so bad that every member of it could have been replaced by a lawn chair and no one would have noticed a difference.

Oh well! A win’s a win, right?

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