NBC4 just posted this terrific profile on superfan Sam “The Horn Guy” Wolk. Beyond the usual lovely sonics, Sam talks about coming to grips with the lockout and even considering the alternatives to hockey. The bit in Landover is my favorite.

Bee tee dubs, check out some of Sam’s art on tumblr and, of course, the esteemed Caps Road Crew.

WOMP WOMP WOMP

Photo credit: @typicalsquirrel

On September 15th, Gary Bettman and NHL owners locked out its players. One other prominent item began a lockout of its own: Sam Wolk’s horn.

Sam, a Washington Capitals superfan known for his loud tooting during games, left his famous prop at home for the entirety of the 115-day labor impasse. On December 6th when the Hershey Bears took on the Norfolk Admirals at the Verizon Center, Wolk came out to Verizon Center to support the Capitals’ minor league affiliate. The horn did not.

“It just wouldn’t be right to do it during a Bears game,” Wolk told me on the phone at the time. “It’s only for the Capitals. The day the NHL lockout’s over, the horn will end its lockout too.”

Well this morning, Washington’s Fox 5 had Sam, his horn, and several other Caps fans on their morning show to help promote the Capitals first home game of the season against the Winnipeg Jets. There was even some horn blowing.

Tonight will mark the first time in 258 days — or 36 weeks and 6 days — that Capitals hockey will be played at Verizon Center. Unfortunately, there will be no tooting tonight.

“I regret that I am unable to attend tonight’s home opener, but I’ll be back in action on Thursday against the Habs,” Sam told us. His message to Caps fans was this: “Be loud, be proud, and enjoy the return of hockey.”

Excuse me while I go have an existential crisis. Anyways, we can all overcome this. Everybody just play the below video at the same time tonight at random parts of the game, and it’ll be like he’s there!

LETS! GO! CAPS!

Video of Horn Guy’s Appearance on Fox 5

Photo credit: Chris Gordon

You watched games one and two. You know New York Rangers fans taunted Alex Ovechkin. You know Ovi had some trouble hearing them after scoring the game-winning goal on Monday.

Here’s how it works: The Madison Square Garden crowd counts down to the 8-minute mark of each period and then chants “Ovi Sucks!” Here’s it in action:

As Ana explained earlier, the chant is a bastardization of what Ottawa Senator fans do at the 11-minute mark to celebrate their captain, Daniel Alfredsson. So it’s like an homage, except mean-spirited and awful. Good news is that Caps superfan Sam “Horn Guy” Wolk plans to redeem the tradition with a remix of the remix. Please consider the following for Game Three tonight.

At 8:08 of each period, start counting down the seconds 8 – 7 – 6 – 5, etc.  until the 8:00 mark.

Then you will chant  ”O-V!” eight times.

It’s quick. It’s easy. And it shows solidarity for Ovi (even if he doesn’t need it).

But really, it’s how we’ll remind Rangers fans that we still do their own cheers better than they do.

Sam tells me the horn will not be involved, and everyone’s screams need to be in unison. To make that happen, you’re gonna have to tell your friends, family, and everyone that you know who’s going to the game about this post and prepare them. Spread the word.

Make us hear you.

Photo credit: Chris Gordon

Thank you to everyone who attended RMNB Party 4: Judgment Day at Front Page Arlington. Thank you to Front Page for being such terrific hosts and putting up with our crowd. Thank you to Wes Johnson for rocking the microphone. Thank you to Mathieu Perreault for scoring the game-winner.

The turnout was terrific, the game was great, and it scarcely could have gone better. Our own paparazzo, Chris Gordon, was snapping pics all night long; here’s a sampling behind the jump. If you’ve got more pics to share, please link ‘em up in the comments or share ‘em on Twitter on the #RMNBParty4 hashtag. If you’ve got a story to tell about the party (love connections, anyone?), let us know that as well. Thanks again!

Sam the Horn Guy pumping up the crowd.

Adam from King of Leonsis was the only person not wearing red.

Arian, who is a Bruins fan, is an exceptional photobomber.

Chris was dedicated to getting awkward photos of me last night. Mission accomplished.

Ian wears Chris’ Yankees hat. The Orioles won 8-2 last night, in case you were wondering.

Wes Johnson makes everything funnier.

Our only fatality of the night. It was nice knowing you, Suzanne.

Ted Starkey and Dave Nichols taking what I’m told is a candid photo, but I’m starting to doubt it.

Happy moment or angry moment? Not sure.

GOAT leads a “Let’s go Caps!” cheer.

Wes delivers his St. Crispin’s Day speech.

Giving away swag during a rousing game of So You’re An Expert!?

Alan May rookie card.

Perturbation on the face of Mr. Sam Wolk.

Perturbation gone from the face of Mr. Sam Wolk.

The cheesy RMNB magnet is not worth that smile.

Our ultimate prize, a signed Pierre McGuire card. At right, Ana cannot believe it.

Superfan fight.

Craig and Doug with Chris.

Craig and Doug with Adam.

The traditional RMNB shooter, shared by Dave, Suzanne, and Ian.

Mike Knuble’s head will never be scratched from an RMNB party. Thanks, Knuble’s Knights!

Caps Basketball is hilarious.

We’re apparently not on the same page about how to pose here.

Neil and Nicci are adorbs.

The end.

(Photo credit: @clydeorama. Go check out Clyde’s site.)

Rituals bind us to one another. In a fan community, rituals take many forms. In the clothing we wear, the cheers we shout, the fives we high– that’s where togetherness happens. It’s like a wholesome mob mentality, and everyone’s allowed in the mob so long as they can do a couple simple things.

Problem is: sometimes those rituals get us into trouble. Some rituals become bad habits, and those bad habits have got to go. You know what I’m talking about: It’s all your fault, Who Cares?, RED!, and a certain nickname for Sidney Crosby. It’s not cool anymore. Let’s discuss.

“It’s all your fault”

Imagine a Capitals player scoring a goal. I ask you to use your imagination because my recent memory is coming up blank. To make it slightly easier, pretend it’s the Caps best goal-scorer Jason Chimera doing the deed. Once P.A. Announcer Wes Johnson growls out the scorer’s name, the red army typically berates the defeated goalie with a taunt of “it’s all your fault!”

There are three ways to categorize a goal: due to scorer skill, due to goalie error, or due to some combination of the two. When the crowd at Verizon Center says, “It’s all your fault!”, they’re also relieving the scorer of any responsibility for that goal. Jason Chimera worked hard for that goal, but you’re saying he got it just because the other guy was incompetent.

Instead: Don’t.

RED!

After witnessing the siege of Fort McHenry in Baltimore, Frederick native Francis Scott Key wrote a poem that was later set to the tune of an old British drinking song.  ”The Star-Spangled Banner” became our national anthem a century later, and it’s been performed at sporting events since the 1950′s. The lyrics remind us that America’s very existence is owed to many valorous dead. In Chinatown, Caps fans memorialize America’s patriots by tunelessly shouting “Red!” during the “rocket’s red glare” line.

Beyond being rude to singer Caleb Green (who is too much of a pro to ever let it shake him), the shouting is dumb. And I say this as a purveyor of dumb things. It’s no more clever than guffawing whenever the number 69 appears. (Heh.) There are many ways to enjoy the national anthem, and all of them are valid so long as this is a nominally free country. But we can do better than this.

Instead: Sing it loud! Or stand silently. Or sit in quiet protest. In America it’s your call, but you don’t have to be a dick about it. (We’ll tackle the “O” thing another time.)

Who cares!

When the opposing team scores at Verizon Center, Wes has the solemn duty to read the scorer, assist, and time of goal. As soon as he finishes, the crowd shouts, “Who cares!”

For context, as of game 23 the Capitals are third-to-last in the league in goals against per game– averaging 3.22. We all care deeply that goals are being scored against our team. If not, we should.

Perhaps when the Caps are leading by 6 goals and Mathieu Perreault is taking his shifts in the cage just for a giggle, it’d be cool. But that’s not right now. Right now our team is fighting for every precious goal it can get, and every puck in our net is a minor tragedy. “Who cares” is false bravado at the wrong time. So….

Instead: Don’t.

Cindy Crysby

When fans discuss star players from other teams, character assassination is hard to avoid. That’s why we get Alex Semin is a diver, P.K Subban is a jerk, and I wouldn’t pee on Danny Briere if he were caked in napalm and I’ve been pounding Gatorades all day. But that stuff is kind of quaint. So too is calling Sidney Crosby a whiner. After all, thanks to 24/7, we’ve got incontrovertible video documentation of Sidney Crosby being a whiner.

Some fans call him Cindy Crysby. Crysby is a little obvious and punny, but I guess it’s fine. Cindy, on the other hand… Here’s why that’s a dick move. You see your sister, mother, girlfriend, wife, daughter sitting next to you? She heard that. And now she’s internalizing what you said– that being a girl is a bad thing. That women have no place in sports, regardless of what mindblowing stuff my 15-year-old cousin is doing on that blueline in Vermont. When you call him Cindy as an insult, you’re perpetuating that boys club nonsense, and it is keeping a pretty cool sport on the fringes.

Sidney Crosby is back,  but he’s still worth mocking. Not because he’s a little bitch and not because we wish serious injury upon him, but because he’s our opponent. We can find new and better ways to talk trash. For now, we’ll toe a fine line.

Instead: Create a poster like this:

But I’m not trying to be a downer; there’s a ton of good habits among Caps fans too. The 100% participation rate for “Unleash the Fury” is still inspiring, and we’ll always have The Horn Guy and Goat to get the crowd going. Maybe we could deal with a few “Crash! The! Net!” cheers and maybe a “ka-NOOOOOOO-ble” chant, but that stuff will come in time.

Verizon Center always explodes in applause for military folks. That’s fantastic. Since there ain’t no way I’m fighting, I’m happy to thank those who will and have. I suppose you guys feel the same. Right on.

Then there’s the rally balloon, an emerging and possibly fleeting trend of spurring a comeback by floating a creepy red balloon out over the ice. That one’s a bit mischievous, isn’t it? It’ll pass for now.

And then there’s my favorite: the D.C Hat Trick. We haven’t seen this one recently, and you may not know it at all, so I’ll explain. When a player scores two goals in regulation and then scores during the shootout, fans at Verizon Center lose their dang minds! It’s great! Even though that goal doesn’t really count at all, Caps fans throw hats on the ice and hoot and holler like history has just been made. This is awesome and should never stop.

Don’t ever change, D.C. We love you just the way you are. Except for, ya know, all the stuff I listed at the top. Change that right away.

Illustration by Ian Oland

A Heartfelt Thank You: Over the last nine months, RMNB has taken away valuable time I could have spent with my closest friends or family. Honestly, I haven’t always enjoyed the late nights of writing, the five Diet Pepsi’s to get through the day or trekking across the tri-state area just to meet one person or get one photo.

But everything changed Saturday night when I met RMNB’s readers. You all are so fun, so passionate, and so dedicated. You showed us what it means to be a true Caps fan, and I feel so blessed that we have carved-out a place where you can all respectfully obsess with us.

At final count, over 150 fans of the blog gathered at Front Page Arlington to simply meet each other and have a good time. We gave you a great excuse to spend your money for a good cause; Samantha Casey’s charity Love146. At the end of the night, you were all gracious enough to donate almost $900 towards it. And yeah, some awesome prizes didn’t hurt either!

Simply put, you are all such inspiring people. You constantly encourage some of my closest friends: Peter, Neil, Fedor, and Kyle – to write insightful, creative, funny pieces about your favorite hockey team. We do this because you are so receptive, so responsive, and just so danged nice. Saturday night was really just a giant thank you to all of you for participating in a blog that has evolved from being more than just a hobby (that I do in my sweatpants). We eagerly look forward to this October and maybe – if we’re lucky – our 2nd Anniversary party can be in June.

Well, with that said, let’s relive the mayhem that was last Saturday Night.

Out of all of us, Neil probably had the best night:

Samantha Casey poses with Miss Virginia USA Neil Greenberg

Then Caps PA Announcer Wes Johnson announced us to the crowd:

Really. Our lives can only go downhill from here. (Photo by Jesse Vaughan)

The introductions were so epic, Neil made sure he could relive the moment for the rest of his life.

Say hello to the Best. Voicemail. Ever.

Then the raffle happened… And Neil embarrassed us again.

Not only did Murf win a RMNB t-shirt, he also won Neil for the night.

Amazingly, there was more to our party than Neil. Like…

Our amazingly beautiful crowd. (Photo by Jesse Vaughan)

We weren't kidding.

Hi!

Two of my favorite people!

Did any of you try the Ovie Burger?

Apparently, it was served on a hot dog bun with Swiss Cheese hand-made by Nicklas Backstrom.

The Bartender was busy all night.

He kept making us a shot that Wes came up with that night.

It was called “The Dale Hunter,” a shot to celebrate the HOFer’s 50th Birthday!

It was a mix of vodka, peach schnapps, and cranberry juice. MMM MMM Delicious.

We also made a big announcement!

Andrew Gordon is going to blog again with us during August!

And don’t worry, we didn’t forget about you Fedor!

We read Fedor’s unedited Thank-you note to the crowd.

Everyone loved it. Though I still don't get that parrot joke. (Photo by Jesse Vaughan)

We gave a lot of free stuff away

RMNB Koozies, keychains, stickers and magnets.

And we auctioned off some great items

Chris wins the ladies medium RMNB T-Shirt

The signed Mike Knuble stick.

And the highly sought-after Michael Jenkins Package

Everyone had a great time!

Even Crazy Knit Hat Lady and her posse consisting of Tim, Stacey and David.

We loved Victoria’s Shoes

The best keds EVER.

And Andrew’s Terrible Dancing

Morgan got a gift she’ll sure cherish forever

Really, I do.

So yeah, we totally had a great time

Kyle, Peter, Neil and Ian

How about next year, Stephanie Carosa actually makes the drive down from Buffalo?

Email us, Steph. We'll mail you some of the free stuff we gave away.

Finally, my terrible sketch found a great home

To the right of a Bears sign and an Edgar Allan Poe figurine!

Additional Coverage: Live in Red, On Frozen Blog

Whew!  How ’bout that game last night?  The Washington Capitals beat the Montreal Canadiens in a plum zinger of a hockey game.  John Carlson and Nick Backstrom summoned some playoff heroics for us, but there’s a problem: they’re both clean-shaven.  Do they know something we don’t?

Just between you and me, RMNB might have taken the celebration too far.  The word hangover seems understated; it’s more like an aftermath.  Compounding the problem, Caps Nation is looking increasingly more haggard.  Scanning the #beardpact channel, I’m seeing a broad spectrum of growth.  Before we get to the parade of stubble, let’s check in with the Russian Machinists.

El Hefe Ian Oland is cheering up, but he’s still #1 on the  most likely to shave list.  Do not let him.

Sentence-maker Peter Hassett is cheerful despite looking terrible.

Numerical Savant Neil Greenberg‘s whimsy declined somewhat in the second period last night.

Even the elusive Russian correspondent Fedor Fedin is getting in on the action!

Parade of Stubble!

It’s never too late to join #beardpact!  Hide your razors now and post your pic on Twitter with the hashtag.  Support your fellow fans who chose to look like serial killers, especially the high-risk ones (like Ian) who might bail.

The magic is starting to work.  Don’t quit now!

Yes, after multiple failed attempts to get his attention (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6), some soul-searching, giving up, and then trying again, The Horn Guy, el toot de extraordinare, is now following us. Commence celebrating… now!

Why is this important? Why are we so happy? Check out why below the fold:

If The Horn Guy is a Caps Superfan, then the Russian Machine is the biggest superfan of this Caps Superfan. Get it? Confused? Ok, we are too. But does it matter?

A hero of man, the most bad ass of Red Rockers, The Horn Guy is the epitome of what the Russian Machine hopes to be considered someday: A leader in expressing Caps Love in a Creative Way.

The Horn Guy is so vital, Wikipedia even mentions him on its Verizon Center Page:

Two notable fan fixtures at Washington Capitals games at Verizon Center since the late ’90s include Goat and The Horn Guy. “Goat,” aka William Stilwell, sits in Section 105 and loudly stomps and starts cheers for the team, with his loud voice that The Washington Post once called “the loudest voice and stompiest stomp on F Street.” “The Horn Guy,” aka Sam Wolk, sits in section 415 and blows out three blasts on a horn to which the arena responds “Let’s Go Caps!,” a chant that can be heard during radio and TV broadcasts, home and away.

We wanted to thank Sam for taking the time to meet us at the JapersRink/PuckDaddy get-together last Thursday (photo shown below), and for his dedication to our favorite team. I don’t care what anybody says, The Horn Guy is responsible for at least 27 Caps victories over the past decade because of the energy he gives to our players.  Those three loud blasts stir us in a deep dark place that the Capstronaut will never reach.  For that, Horn Guy, we love you.

What rocks the red and has two thumbs? Blogigarch Ian Oland (left) and TheHornGuy (right).

If you’re like us and can’t get enough of Horn Guy, please do the following:
Check out the Caps Road Crew Website he & his wife started | Follow Him On Twitter | Follow Him On Facebook after You Follow Us |  Read about him on the DC Sports Bog | View His Deviant Art Profile