Troy “Professor” Brouwer Could Win An Emmy

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Troy Brouwer‘s insane, mind-boggling career season continues. After scoring a career-high 25 goals (which forced me to wear spandex) and receiving his first career World Championships invite to Team Canada, Brouwer has been nominated… for a local Emmy?

Did I read that right? [Re-scans the Capital Emmys Facebook page again.] Yes. Yes, I did.

Brouwer, along with 11 others (including DC101′s Elliot Segal), are a part of the Caps Red Line team up for the Best Local Sports Program Series Emmy. It’s the fourth straight year CRL has been nominated.

The 28-year-old British Columbia native served as a segment host for the series, donning a white laboratory coat and giving essential, nerdy insight as his alter ego, Professor Brouwer.

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Troy Brouwer: 2013-14 Season Review

Photo: Chris Gordon

Someone protect us from the wrath of the Brouwer Rangers. Today’s the day we talk about their boy, Troy Brouwer, and both of the seasons he had.

By the Numbers

82 Games played
18.4 Average time on ice per game
25 Goals
18 Assists
47.8% Shot attempt percentage during 5v5
47.8% Goal percentage during 5v5
7.2% On-ice shooting percentage during 5v5
93.2% On-ice saving percentage during 5v5

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Photo: @JPughNBC4

It’s going to be a long, wet, hot, hockeyless summer. The way we see it, you have two choices:

  1. Spend the next five months (FIVE MONTHS, REALLY?!) in some dark corner balled up in the fetal positioning mumbling about perimeter shots.
  2. Do fun/stupid stuff to take your mind off how sad and lonely you are without hockey.

The latter seems preferable from a mental health perspective, and we’re here to help! In partnership with the fine folks at RMNB, we’re proud to present the First Annual Brouwer Pouwer Generic-Photograph-Manipulation-Software Skills Contest™.

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Despite not making the playoffs, a lot of Washington Capitals players still have some hockey left to play. Last week, Caps captain Alex Ovechkin announced that Evgeny Kuznetsov, Dmitry Orlov, and he will be representing Team Russia in the 2014 World Championships happening in Minsk, Belarus.

But what of the Caps’ Swedes? After winning a silver medal in Sochi, Marcus Johansson will likely not represent his home country due to a broken arm. On Thursday, Pär Mårts, Sweden’s national team coach, told Svenska Dagbladet that Nicklas Backstrom has turned down an invitation to play in the tournament this year.

When asked why, Mårts said Backstrom won’t be playing “for family reasons.”

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Photo: Chris Gordon

On Monday, the Washington Capitals held Breakdown Day at Kettler Capitals Iceplex. For two hours, Caps players filed out of the locker room and conducted exit interviews with the media. Because of the whole no playoffs thing, there were a lot of long faces.

There’s about three hours of interview video to surf though on Monumental Network. Because I hate myself and care only about you, dear reader, I’ve transcribed all the key quotes. And because this is RMNB, I also pointed out the fashion choices. Sadly, there was no crazy hair this year.

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The Caps-Blues game started off nice enough. The good guys drew a penalty late in the first period when Derek Roy slashed Alex Ovechkin. The Caps power play had a couple of looks, but everything went wrong after that.

It ended with Troy Brouwer and Marcus Johansson lying on the ice in pain, the second white-on-white collision in as many weeks.

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The Nail: Devils Beat Caps 2-1

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Photo: Bruce Bennett

Tuesday’s Caps game was ugly. The days that followed didn’t get much better. Adam Oates kinda sorta maybe called out Alex Ovechkin on Wednesday for being Alex Ovechkin. The national hockey media devoured it like it was some delicious Chipotle guac. Ovi wasn’t made available to reporters on Thursday to respond.

With six games left, everyone started to realize it would take divine intervention for the Capitals to make the playoffs. If they did make it, they didn’t deserve to be there — and the Capitals knew that.

The scoring got started tonight with an even-strength Alex Ovechkin tally, the first since we still cared about the Winter Olympics. Playing on a line with Mikhail Grabovski and Nicklas Backstrom, Ovi took a feed from Grabo in the near circle before flipping the puck past Cory Schneider.

During a second period in which the Devs dominated play, New Jersey tied the game up. Twelve minutes into the frame, Tuomo Ruutu tipped home a shot from D-man Eric Gelinas to make it one-one.

The Caps headed into the third with a man-advantage, needing their power play to once again save them from disaster. It didn’t happen.

Ryan Carter scored a late goal for New Jersey. Devils beat Caps 2-1.

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Brouwer laughs at Ian. Seriously, that’s what’s happening in this photo. (Photo: Patrick Smith)

Ian Oland is a very stupid person. In the midst of Troy Brouwer’s poor start, Ian bet that the winger wouldn’t hit 20 goals this season. Because he lost, Ian had to dress up as a Brouwer Ranger during Saturday’s game. Since the beginning of February, however, Brouwer has 13 goals. He scored two against Nashville on Sunday, hitting a career high. With 23 goals, Brouwer is having his best season ever.

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First-year pro Patrick Wey hit Nashville Predators facepuncher extraordinairre Rich Clune along the benches on Sunday night. That was obviously unacceptable per the rules of gentlemanly conduct, so Clune challenged Wey to a fight and then knocked him out.

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Evgeny Kuznetsov Scores Unlikely Goal in Final Minute

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The Capitals sort of played a stinker against the Boston Bruins. There was precious little to enjoy about the game: a couple flashy saves by Braden Holtby, Jason Chimera crashing the net, maybe Ian rocking the spandex with the Brouwer Rangers. Thanks to the game’s final minute, we can add one more to that list: Evgeny Kuznetsov‘s stinger of a goal.

Seemingly defeated by Carl Soderberg’s insurance goal with seven minutes left, the Caps struggled to put together any kind of offensive push in the closing minutes of rego. Troy Brouwer made one such push, but the Bruins D tied him up. That play looked like it would fizzle like so many others against Boston.

Enter the New Guy.

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