Let’s analyze the psychology of each type of fan.

Washington Capitals fan, neophyte

Possibly unaware that Jaromir Jagr ever donned the Caps red and white black and brown, the Caps bandwagon limits its gaze across the International Dateline to Russia. Russia sports no fewer than six former Washington Capitals, and their play is (supposed to be) as aggressive as the home team’s. Canada sacrificed any chance of garnering the Caps newbie’s support when Steve Yzerman passed over @GreenLife52. Team USA stirs up some base patriotic vitriol, but the unfamiliar roster and lack of hype surrounding the team undermines any appeal to the Johnny-come-lately Caps fan.

Washington Capitals fan, with an autographed Dale Hunter jersey

The Caps fan of the Bondra era still mourns the Cup-round blowout of 1998 and is filled to the brim with bile for the Pittsburgh Penguins. Because of this long-brewing rivalry, the ancient Caps fan, peering over his 401k report towards a standard-definition television, cannot bring himself to root for any team containing a Penguin. Canada and Russia lose any chance at garnering his favor because of Crosby and Malkin, respectively. Grandpa Caps fan somehow overrides his Penguinphobia when considering Brooks Orpik’s presence Team USA; perhaps it’s the dusty memory of Lake Placid 1980 or the manly gristle of Ryan Miller’s unkempt facial hair.

Pittsburgh Penguins fan, there but for the grace of God

The Pittsburgh Penguins are one of the most talented teams in the NHL, but their geographical origins have rendered them far flung in the Olympiad. This puts the fans in an awkward position, as they must now reconcile the relative vitality of their favorite players in order to pick a team to root for. Should their allegiances drift above the border to Mike Richards and Sidney Crosby, he of the private jet? Or perhaps Evgeni “Geno” Malkin’s dynamism will excite the inner fan despite his Washingtonian linemates? And then there’s Brooks Orpik sporting the nation’s colors, piggybacking on nationalistic fervor. Frankly, no one’s got it tougher than the Pens fan for the next week.

Gretzky

Gretzky’s rooting for Ovechkin. After that torch-lighting SNAFU, 99 wants nothing to do with his countrymen.

Old-school Puckheads

The hockey faithful from days of yore consider Sidney Crosby to be the second coming of Mario Lemieux. When Jeremy Roenick, who always looks like he has just gotten out of the shower, speaks, the senior hockey fans must be restrained from throwing slippers at their TVs. To this fan, Team USA lacks a marquee name or a hockey pedigree worthy of his support. Nay, the Puckhead’s eyes invariably look to Canada, as surely a decent hockey player could hail from nowhere else. This fan, to the surprise of thinking people everywhere, discusses the gold medal as if has been bequeathed to Canada from on high, and the mountiess need merely show up and claim their prize. Even if this fan played for the Bruins and coached for the Islanders (and beat up a fan with his own shoe), this dude will become his ultimate obsequious self only when speaking in praise of Team Canada.

When March finally arrives, we’ll all need showers.

Alex Ovechkin mentally crushing you (Photo: Fotobank.ru / Getty Images)

While TJ of Alex Ovetjkin has been absolutely tearin’ up the Translation Game right now for The Olympics (check out his awesome work here), the Russian Machine has taken a more gradual approach. Unlike TJ, we prefer Fedor continue to eat meals, sleep 8 hours a day and exercise. So tonight, we present Artem Zagumennov’s interview with Alex Ovechkin after he immediately got off the plane to Vancouver. His article was published on Championat.ru yesterday morning.

Below the jump, find out about Alex Ovechkin’s SHEEP-CRET, who he partied with on the plane over & how many sticks he brought to Vancouver.

Artem Zagumennov – People greeted you here like a president. Is it unusual for you?
Alex Ovechkin – Yeah, I’m not the president, I don’t need this welcome.

AZ – Tell us, how was your flight?
AO – Good, I was with Semin and Varlamov, Backstrom and Fleischmann flew with us as well. It was fun, although most of the way I was asleep. [Ed Note: I find this hard to believe]

AZ – You came off board and are now in a party.
AO – Yes, you’re right. That’s how it should be.

AZ – It had to feel that you are definitely at the Olympics…
AO – Yes, it was immediately obvious. A lot of fans, a lot of Canadian flags, a mass of people who recognize me on the street. This is Canada, the people here are crazy about hockey.

AZ – Fleischmann already disclosed the secret that you’ll play in skates with special “speedy blades.” Is this true?
AO – No…

AZ – No?
AO – Honestly, it’s still a secret.

AZ – Did you prepare something special for the Olympics?
AO – Yeah, but you’ll see, I won’t tell.

Ovechkin's SHEEP-CRET? Russian word ovechka means (cracked out) little lamb. (Photo by Pavel Lysenkov)

AZ – In Torino you brought 19 sticks to the games. How many now?
AO – 42 (laughing). No, seriously, 24.

AZ – How’s the weather in Vancouver?
AO – It’s OK for the hockey players, we’re playing indoors, but I think for the skiers it’s not.

AZ – So you’re not amazed that it’s winter now and at the Olympiad there’s no snow?
AO – Sometimes this weather happens, and we can’t avoid it. It’s Vancouver, can you imagine what will happen in Sochi?

AZ – I guess, you’re not acclimated, your flight was short though.
AO – Yeah, sure, I’m not acclimated yet. [The flight's] hard for other guys, but not for us. All is close here and we’ll get used to Vancouver conditions soon.

AZ – Who will your roommate?
AO – Nikulin.

AZ – What were you talking about for so long with Proshkin?
AO – It’s a secret.

AZ – Have you decided how you’ll celebrate your goals?
AO – Well, you first need to score, then you celebrate. And how – this is the second question. Generally it’s better to celebrate wins, not goals.

AZ – In Canada you’re getting special attention, everyone talks and writes about Ovechkin. What do you think about it?
AO – Well, just no one has arrived yet. They have to talk about someone, they chose me.

AZ – Can you compare your feelings before Vancouver with your feelings before Torino? You were just 20 years old then, now you’re a star.
AO – Yeah, when I came to Olympics at the age of 20, I felt butterflies in my stomach. Since then, I have become more experienced. I went through World Championships, Stanley Cup playoffs. I have grown up vastly in terms of experience. My feelings are very different.

AZ – Do you feel any psychological pressure because you’re the main hope of the team and everyone is expecting incredible play by you?
AO – The main thing is expectations should be on the team, not me personally. No one here needs personal stats.

AZ – How many kilograms of muscles (Ed Note: FEDOR THIS ISN’T LBS) have you added in the last 4 years?
AO – Ugh, I don’t know, I have to take a look at the stats.

AZ – Where’s the stick you scored in Torino Olympic quarterfinal against Canada with?
AO – I don’t know, I didn’t save it. I collect sticks of other players, not my own.

AZ – You’ll live in the Olympic village together with Crosby and other Canadians. On the ice it’s a war between these countries, everyone wants a Canada-Russia final. What’s it like for you?
AO – I think, we’ll talk normally. Maybe everyone wants a war, but it’s too early to talk about it. Anyways, Olympics won’t hurt our relationships, there’s a big difference between the rink and real life.

AZ – Three games without goal heading into the Olympics, can you explain why it happened.
AO – I’m saving it up for the national team! I’ll try to end my goal drought and start to produce goals again!

During the rest of The Olympic Games, make sure you check out Alex Ovetjkin, The Washington Post’s Heavy Medal Blog & Alex Ovechkin Spotlight page (hey that’s us!), Tuvanhilbilly’s updates on Japers’ Rink, and Russian Hockey Fans everyday for all your Team Russia/Translation Needs. Until tomorrow, we say goodnight and Sweden Rules too!

• Instant icing. The refs will blow the whistle as soon as the puck crosses a second red line.   No such thing as washing out.  Expect more frequent stoppages in play.
• Stay out of the crease. Mike Knuble would not fare well at the Olympics.  Any forward encroaching on the paint will be met with an instant whistle.   Faceoff comes out of the zone.  Expect more frequent stoppages in play.
• Longer OT. In the bronze medal match, the fourth period will be 10 minutes of 4 on 4.  In the gold, the OT will be 20 long minutes.  Would that we could be so lucky to have 80 minutes of USA vs. Russia.
• No headshots. In the NHL, if you have the chance to pop a dude in the noggin, you take it.  NHL refs will let some head shots slide unless they’re gloves-off, into the glass, elbows-up, or egregious.  In Vancouver any hit to the head will be penalized.
• Shootout free-for-all. Once the first three shootout players go, anybody can.  You can even repeat.  You just send everybody except Semin and Varly to the locker room.  They’ll keep shooting and blocking until they deliver the win.
• Free-range goalie. The keeper can do keeperly duties anywhere he wants.  And you know that what means…

(Is that really the best quality available, YouTube? C’mon.)

There you have it: your cheatsheet to sounding informed regarding Olympic hockey.  And don’t forget to tell your friends about the erudite website from which you gained this wisdom: The Pensblog.

First, RMNB taught you how to correctly pronounce the names of some of Team Russia’s Best Hockey Players. After the significant attention our post received, we figured our readers desired to learn more. So today, RMNB is going to teach you how to root for the Russian National Team in Vancouver with style. Yes that’s right, like a Ruskie! Take it away Fedor.

Are you fan of the Russian Hockey Team? Are you going to root for Russia in the Olympics? If you’ve answered yes to both questions, then you’ll probably be interested in the most popular fan chants in Russia and how to pronunce them. I’ve included easy and difficult chants.

“Вперёд, Россия!”
“VperYOOOd, RossIya!”
“Let’s go Russia” (Special Note: triple vowel means looong sound. CAPITAL vowel means stress.)

This is the Main chant. If you’re a little confused on how to pronounce “YO” (∏), check out our post here.

“Мы приехали, чтобы победить, чтобы победить, чтобы победить”
“MIII priiiEEEhali, chtOby pobedIt, chtOby pobedIt, chtOby pobedIt”
“We came here to win, to win, to win”

This is a pretty long and difficult chant, but let’s try it anyways! This is one of the main chants that Russians do during games. You know the song by the Beatles called “Yellow Submarine”? Russians generally sing this chant with the chrous of that song. I don’t think there’s anything too difficult to pronounce here.

“Шайбу! Шайбу!”
“ShAAAybu! ShAAAybu!”
“Puck! Puck!” [our exclaim to get the puck]

100% classic Russian hockey chant. Easiest way to support!

“Верим в команду”
“VEriiim v komAAAndu”
[We] “Believe in our team”

This song fans use when team is losing. [Ed Note: Welp, we won't be needing this one.] Best way to show your support when game isn’t going good for the team.

Lastly, we need to educate you on the flag we generally use, which is shown at the top of the post. It’s a combination of the Russian Flag, a crazed, blood-thirsty bear (which is our national symbol), and Russian Text which says “Let’s go Russia.” Soccer fans actually used this at a game between Russian and England. It was the biggest flag ever used in a sporting event.

So now you are ready to root for Team Russia! Check in tomorrow, as the writers of RMNB will share our Olympic Hockey Predictions with you. Also, check out Melissa Allen’s Ovechkin artwork below to get you in the spirit!

Melissa Allen shares her Russian Pride via this illustration.

Fedor provides for us another illuminating interview translation, this time between Slava Malamud of Sports-Express.ru and Alex Ovechkin. In today’s piece, Alex thanks the fans for waking the team up during the Penguins game, explains the value of a fight, and discusses his prospects for Vancouver.

Q: What was the reason of Capitals’ slow start [at Sunday's game]?

Alex Ovechkin: Weather meddled in it for sure. We’re used to seeing fans wind us up during warm-ups. But some fans were late to the start of the game due to snowfall. It was unusually silent. Perhaps it unsettled us. But when the fans stepped up for the third period, we just couldn’t stop.

Q: In the first period, when you were boarded, Knuble fought for you.

A: It’s one of the moments; when you see your teammates ready to fight for you if something happens. It was a turning point for us.  Everyone started to fight.  Mike received 17 penalty minutes. That was what we needed. I so like hard games.

Q: Your productivity before the Olympics is perfect.

A: I’m going to be the optimal fit for Vancouver. What am I to do? I must do it.

I, for one, choose to interpret that last answer as a declaration of infallibility.  When taken in combination with AO’s hubristic interview with Lindsay Czarniak, The Great Eight seems to promise to return from Vancouver with stratospheric goal production, a gold medal, and the head of (Canadian superstar) Bill Shatner.  Others, however, might consider this a radical interpretation of the text.

Agree to disagree.

“Hockey boom will happen in Vancouver”

Alex Ovechkin: Happy new year for all!!
Dmitri Chesnokov: How was your 2009?
AO: It was a good year. I gained experience, achieved some goals. And above all – all are safe and sound. Rest is secondary.
DC: The Year of the Tiger begins with very important event in your life – The Olympic Games. A while ago you visited Vancouver as a Capitals player. What is the situation there now?
AO: It’s a hockey town. I was amazed by how many people came to the game and events I took part in! It’s hard to imagine what it will be like for the Olympic Games. It will be a Hockey Boom there!
DC: What were the events you took part in?
AO: Signed Russian national team jerseys. The Organizing committee of Games arranged that. Yes, it’s a hockey town, but I can’t imagine how it’ll be when the Olympics will be there. Let’s wait until February.
DC: Were you excited for the Russian Olympic roster announcement?
AO: Of course. A roster spot wasn’t guaranteed for anyone. I understand the feelings of guys who didn’t find their names on the list. It happens to everyone. But no one will go to Vancouver for past services. And no one will go there for friendships with somebody (referring to Semyon Varlamov). It’s not amateur hockey. The Olympics are a very serious tournament.
DC: Why did organizers demand the roster now? And coaches will not be able to make changes as Games go…
AO: I do not deal with this issue. These are the rules by [the Olympic Game] organizers. I don’t think about it. My goal was to be on the “23 Man Roster”. I held it down. Next goal – to be in the best shape of my life for February.

“I’ll not reduce speed”

DC: “Soviet Sport” reported a few days ago that “The Hockey News” named you the second influential man in world hockey…
AO: I knew about it!
DC: Probably because you were second this year, too. Why weren’t you first?
AO: It means that I don’t deserve it. Very deserving people go ahead of me.
DC: More specifically, one man: Gary Bettman. Let’s leave him unaccounted for. He’s the NHL commissioner. What are your feelings about being the coolest player in the NHL, Alex?
AO: I’m cool?! Oh, you really are nice, guys… Let’s say it this way, I’m very glad to be on top of the list. Thanks for my dad and my mom. They brought me up right. Thanks for all the coaches that worked with me. Especially for Semenov and Bilyaletdinov, who were busy with me. Without Bilyaletdinov it would be hard to build my life. He put me on the right track.
DC: What do you think about the talks that you have to give up your power style of play. They say It’s dangerous and Alex won’t able to do so for a long time in NHL, a very hard league.
AO: Why should i have to change something that’s working? If I made some mistakes it is not a reason to ruin yourself and go back to the start. For example: you’re driving a car at full speed. You had some kind of road accident. It’s life, everything may happen. But you won’t stop driving and ride a bike, right? Or you can ride roller skates very slow. But who is interested in that?
DC: Not long ago we saw your photoshoot in glossy. You’re on the “Harley”. And you say that you’re not cool.
AO: One russian magazine asked that. All right…
DC: In another town you were photographed with a very nice girl…
AO:It was in the US. I have very good friend who occupies himself with my press relations. Probably, you know him – Arik Zakaryan, agent of figure skater Pluschenko. He organized my date with the bike…
DC: Who organized your date with the girl?
AO: Other people helped.
DC: Do not sidestep the question! Did you choose the girl for the photos?
AO: Not at all. I didn’t think too much about it. I don’t worry about what’s in the paper. Ovechkin is Ovechkin. Organic man. Why I need to copy someone?

“Mora is our captain”

DC: Your teammate on the Olympic team Ilya Kovalchuk is at a crossroads. He’s going to become a Free Agent in the summer. According to rumors he may go to DC.
AO: I doubt whether he will play for the Caps. But if it will happen, Washington will become a killing team!
DC: Can you give advice for a friend?
AO: I don’t think Ilya needs any. He’s an experienced guy. He has an alternative. He may quietly play for the rest of the season, go to the market and find a team he wants. There is no sense to advise him on this. I will be happy for him in any case. He decides a great deal. He’s the leader of his team.
DC: You’re right about Kovalchuk’s leadership. What do you think, can he become a captain of the Russian Olympic team?
AO: You should ask the coaches about it. But we have a captain – Alexey Morozov. Every one of our players is a leader in the locker room. Everyone can scold if something is wrong. In terms of it, the “C” on a jersey it’s only a formality. But it’s not right. You should deserve it. Mora deserve it, like nobody’s business.
DC: How will you see the New Year in?
AO: We’ll fly out to LA with the team. We’ll find something. We’ll decorate a New Year’s Palm, ::laughing Ovechkin::
DC: We suggest you say a humorous greeting for our readers. Imagine yourself in Santa’s role.
AO: Joking apart! Health is the first. You have nothing without it. Let’s see, how many great people died this year? It’s not important how much money you have – 100 rubles or 100 of millions. I wish you health. Robust health. And love – it’s obligatory, too. And be happy! We will be at pains for you to be so at the end of February.